A cunting please for modern ties please admin. Being of the age where relatives drop off the perch with monotonous regularity, I found that my trusty black funeral tie has gone missing in action. I had to ring a mate up, he was not impressed as I woke the poor sod up.

Anyway the modern ties are fucking short leaving yours truly with one that when done up looks like one Oliver Hardy used to wear in days of yore. I can hear the cunters tuning up their violins as I cunt, but fear not cunters, I brought one from the British Heart foundation, a long one too for a quid. Result CuntyMort is at his funerial best again.

Nominated by: CuntyMort

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The former “levelling up” Secretary has suggested he wants a “quiet life” after stepping down from frontline politics while enjoying throwing a few unhelpful barbs at Truss and her cabinet from the safety of the backbenches.

For a person who wants the quiet life what the fuck is he doing at the Tory Party Conference in Birmingham suggesting that the Tory Party has lost its way and that there is already discontent amongst prominent Cabinet Ministers regarding Truss’ leadership and uneasy relationship not only with her Chancellor, but the Bank of England and the Office of National Statistics (who incorrectly claimed the country was officially in recession, even though it isn’t. At least not yet) – (Obviously things have moved on since Techno submitted his nom last month. But the facts remain the same, Gove is still a cunt! – Day Admin)

Gove is an oily little shit, quick to stab anyone in the back, and always hopping between ministerial roles but never achieving anything of note. And what the fuck he did during his 5 minutes as “levelling up” secretary (what a Mickey Mouse title) is anyone’s business.

Gove wants to be seen as some kind of Tory Grandee, but in essence he is nothing more than a bitter and twisted individual, primarily because he never became leader or PM – a position he never openly admitted to wanting but the hints were always there.

Instead he’ll end up like Heseltine, Lawson, Brown, Blair, Major and other embittered old cunts put out to pasture with nothing better to do than rabble-rouse to the media and earn a few thousand quid from the lecture circuit slagging off the Party.

Telegraph News Link

Nominated by: Technocunt

‘An absolute disgrace!’

‘The scenes were ‘not good enough’.

Balls to that. It’s great to see a good old fashioned brawl. I bet the ‘crowd’ fucking loved it. I thought the Scrappy Doo figure who threw the punch to start it all didn’t throw his punch properly.

That was a let down, lads.

Next time, take some chairs and tables to break over each others heads.

And if they go down, make sure you jump on their heads.

Can’t be too careful nowadays.

https://www.bbc.com/news/av/uk-wales-63370566

The Sun Link.(Extra time link nodded in by Night Admin – NA)

Nominated by: Cuntybollocks

I’d like to cunt shop assistants who constantly try to upsell. And as an aside I’d also like to cunt the word “upsell”, but perhaps another time for that one.

What has annoyed me for years is when I go into a small business, particularly bakeries that are staffed with Asian females, there will always that one employee who is hellbent on impressing the boss with her sales.

I understand they are probably on about AU$8 per hour. And I think this sucks.

But if I frequent the same bakery a few times per week, and have been doing so for about a year-and-a-half. And if the same serving wench attends to me each time I ask:

“May I please have one biscotti please?”

I get pissed off when in reply she asks me:

“How many?”

Or:

“Just one?”

Bloody Nora … yes, just fuckin’ one.

(She’s an absolute looker with a great, almost scantily clad bod though so … I maintain composure).

Nominated by: Crocacunt Dundee

(More info on upselling here, Day Admin – Shopify Link )

The good old Guardian. Again.

You would think that an Asian PM would give the fuckers some cheer. But no:-

” Rishi Sunak is Britain’s first Asian prime minister – but it’s no progressive victory”

Please note that the name of this journalist is Hashi Mohamed. So no anti Indian bias of course.

Commenting on the Trussed election he says:-

”Alas, for Tory party members it was still preferable to elect a white woman than a brown man; just as well they won’t be able to vote on his appointment this time.”

Yep, racism innit. Even a woman preferable to an Indian. The rest of this horseshit, if you can be bothered to read it, becomes an anti Indian/Hindu diatribe.

The Guardian, bringing you woke racism at it’s finest.

MSN News Link

Nominated by: Cuntstable Cuntbubble