Guilt laden charity adverts

A cunting required for all the guild laden charity adverts I am seeing these days, saw the above adopt a fucking Orca ad today and thought for fuck sake, they are now touting for people to adopt a wild Orca and keep Orca families together, pay for an Orcas shopping, or a homeless Orca you get the idea, thats just one of them.
There are hundreds baby shades with cleft lips, African babies with a cold, homeless crack heads, who need a new I phone- donate £50,ex Donkey porn stars, young muzzie girls married to stinky old pervs- and the affronts of white wimminz who have an issue with this,
Dirty Harriet just says don’t send money to the cunts send them condoms.
Then we have help the people of Gaza, Ukraine ,Amanda Holden’s next surgeries, repairs to Harvey Prices new cage, RSPA and my personal favourite the RNLI .
Some of these are indeed worthy causes, some are not and some are just miss used, like using life boats to bring illegal immigrants to the UK from France [ that really pisses me off].
But then i started thinking, when did this stuff become big business and how much of your donation actually goes where the guilt shamed donator thinks it goes.
So first and foremost it looks like 40pence out of every pound is paid in tax to the government, then the cost of the adverts, then the boss of the company gets a share and then further trickle down economics until the tiny percentage thats left finally gets given intended end user.
Also what is the percentage that has to be donated by the charity to be classed as a charity 30% apparently and then that 30%is then miss used by the organization [think RNLI] to be spent how they see fit.
So first and foremost the charity spends the money on itself, the street i used to work in had a building built, so they could move out of a rented building using donations meant for the actual kids they are meant to be helping, another on the same street are supposed to be helping homeless people and all we saw is electric cars and chargers being installed that are never used and thats only obvious if you can see it, imagine the money that gets spunked up the wall by these outfits and what money grabbing cunts they all really are.
Then of course you have completely unregulated crowd funding and this is by cunts who want to cut out the cunts who skim off the top, dead scrotes whose mum wants another all expense paid trip abroad or football hooley killed for probably acting like a cunt in Spain and the beat goes on…..

bornfree

Nominated by Fuglyucker and seconded by Chuff Chugger.

I would not only like to second this cunting, but add to it if I may. Gone are the days in TV charity adverts asking for a donation, or will legacy. The latest charity adverts are now asking for either specific amounts or minimum amounts….not contents with the odd fiver, they now state ‘£25 will buy Ranjit a weeks worth of food’ or ‘£50 will buy Willomena and her load of sprogs clean water for a year’ thus guilt shaming people in to send more than the original fiver they were going to send, so will now send more than they can afford or not even send the fiver they were going to as it’s considered such a paltry amount.

Cunts.

Rory Campbell

is a cunt.

Oh dear, I forsee trouble breaking out in the Campbell dynasty.

Old soak Alistair, probably already hitting the bottle harder than ever over Orange Man’s victory, has now seen his £300,000 ‘investment’ in his son’s gambling syndicate disappear down the swanee.

Son Rory, clearly a chip off the old cunt block, described his syndicate as ‘massively low risk’ and convinced his dad and others to ‘invest’ millions. One wonders how pissed the old man must have been to believe that gambling on the outcome of football matches amounts to a low risk investment.

Hopefully Rory will do the decent thing now and do himself in, then his old man can find out how it feels to lose a close family member to suicide.

MSN

Nominated by Geordie Twatt.

Roy Keane


Roy Keane is such a bellend.

The rent-a-grouch has now said the highlight of his entire career was his time as Eire’s assistant manager. Keane has described his five years as Republic of Ireland manager Martin O’Neill’s assistant as “the highlight of my career”.

You know, the Ireland who won fuck all.

Keane played in one of the greatest and most fondly remembered Manchester United teams ever. With greats like Cantona, Schmichel, Kanchelskis, Hughes, Ince, Giggs and Robson. Two league and cup doubles, and not forgetting Keane’s own heroics against Juventus in 1999.

Yet, his hatred for Alex Ferguson blinds everything. As he just won’t acknowledge Fergie’s greatness, fall out or not. Keane also once called Brian Clough the greatest manager he ever played for. And that was also just to purposely snub Fergie.

We all know Keane hates Sir Alex. He’s said it often enough (the moaning cunt). But, to let that eclipse genuine success and true greatness? It shows what a childish and grudgeful cunt he really is.

And, stand up to those gobshite wimmin pundits on Sky, you soft cunt.

Daily Mirror.

Oh yeah. Keane also played in the 1999 treble winning side. With Scholes, Stam, Sheringham, Solksjaer,Yorke and the rest.

But being Martin O’Neill’s sidekick was better than winning the treble.
Sod off.

Nominated by : Norman

Cadburys chocolate

is a cunt.

Once a treat, we all remember the “glass and a half” don’t we.
Well l and older cunters will, because Cadbury can’t make that claim anymore

Even the King can’t endorse the dog chocolate they purvey these days.

He’s withdrawn the Royal Warrant.

Good on you, but you’re still Jug Eared.

Cadbury, as we all know, has been bought out by the Grinch, otherwise known as the company that has turn Mis favourite Ritz crackers into bland pap.

I don’t know what the fucking hell it’s all about, unless it’s a plot to get us all used to a delicious dish of crickets?

bbcnews

Nominated by Jeezum Priest.

Big Issue sellers

I’m in a festive, goodwill to all men, mood this Christmas morning, so it’s time to cunt Big Issue sellers.

I sort of liked the idea of the Big Issue when it was conceived all those years ago – the idea of giving someone fallen on a shit situation a purpose and means of earning a living in order to give them independence and control over their lives and so that they could then move back into regular work and have the means to sustain their own accommodation. The right balance of charity and self-responsibility it seemed to me.

But what I’ve noticed is that these fuckers don’t seem to want to ever do anything more than stand there selling this dogshit rag, there’s no sign (amongst the ones I encounter at least) of them ever taking the next challenging steps of getting a proper job and moving themselves back into society.

I used to occasionally buy a copy / put a few quid in the hands of a foreign (muzzie) looking female seller who plies you with the Big Issue guilt down by the entrance of our local supermarket. I nipped in there yesterday, and, sure enough, there she was as usual with that guilt-tripping beatific smile, only it’s Christmas so you should be feeling especially bad for her and dig even deeper into your pocket. But I pretended to be on my phone as I went in and out of the supermarket. Why? Cos she’s been there for ten fucking years! And still all the over-monied locals of this neighbourhood buy her magazine and give her dosh in her hand, instead of saying to her listen love we’ve been happy to support you getting onto your own two feet this last decade, but maybe it’s time to start walking by yourself now?

I’m sure many of you will think I’m the cunt here, I’m willing to take the flak on this to see what others think.

big issue

Nominated by Balsamic Dave.