are useless cunts.
NONE of them fucking work. NONE.
Hold your breath? Tried. Tried strangling myself, suffocating head in pillow, it doesn’t work.
Drink a cold drink? Took a gulp of the heavily iced vodka and orange that gave me the cunts in the first place, didn’t work.
Pull your knees to your chest? Dislodges a mega fart but doesn’t cure the hiccunts.
I know one thing that’ll work, so I’m off to watch an ISIS instruction video.
Nominated by WokeUpTodayAndRealisedWhatACuntIAm.
Get ready guys and gals for airlines to introduce compulsory wearing of seat belts at all times, no walking up and down the aisle during a flight and being escorted in a protective suit to go to the toilet……just in case.
Sounds unlikely or even bonkers?
Well, if enough of these compo chasing cunts win these erroneous cases then it could happen for fear of the airlines being sued….for a natural phenomenon- an ‘act of god’; if you like
This old cunt is trying to sue an airline for turbulence….yup- as if it was something an airline would be in control of!
Read the story (below) this compo cunts husband didn’t even die as a result of this turbulence throwing him around- he died of a heart attack shitting himself when it started.
I hope this gets thrown out of court…..and no doubt the no win no fee lawyer gets told to fuck off forever. Don’t get me wrong, I have no interest in airlines, but I do have an interest in freedom and lessening red tape, but cases like this..if won, will result in airlines introducing some, if not all the suggested outcomes I made at the beginning of this cunting. It’s because of people like this, we now have ‘warning contents may be hot’ on coffee cups. You think…we don’t need that, then you read a story like this and businesses then start to cover their arses..just in case.
Nominated by Chuff Cugger.
was a cunt.
Dear dear me.
The Perfect illustration of the collapse of decent society,replaced in many parts by feral human trash.
“Serious disorder at a balloon release for one of the young men who died in the A66 car crash is “unacceptable”, an MP has said.
Durham Police said a large crowd gathered on a privately owned field near Haswell, County Durham, on Thursday evening where five vehicles were set on fire and balloons, flares, and fireworks were released.
Redcar MP Anna Turley said it put lives at risk, while Assistant Chief Constable Jon McAdam said the force condemned “anyone who would use that tragedy as an excuse for disorder”.
“Durham Police said officers decided to let the cars burn because “the field was contained and it was assessed there was no immediate risk to wider public safety”.
County Durham and Darlington Fire and Rescue Service said one crew arrived at the scene but withdrew “given the circumstances and concerns for the safety of our firefighters”.
How about making an example of the thieving gypsy bastarđs?
A last gasp of common sense policing..knock total fuck out of the entire rabble..
No chance of that in Modern Britain.
Nominated by Unkle Terry.
are cunts.
I’m a miserable cunt, bitter about the world and everyone in it. I have to work 7 days of the week to keep a business running, dealing with bullshit from staff and customers on a daily basis. This is while living in a country run by Stalinists who want to fuck me for all the tax they can get (and give to workshy scum of all shades), and who want to tell me I’m an evil capitalist exploiter and I should be allowed to be sued at every opportunity by lazy narcissistic tribunal trigger happy arseholes who are empowered to cause businesses endless stress whilst simultaneously complaining there’s no jobs out there. I am surrounded by lefty cunts who want to hector me about how I need to be kind to trannies, darkies, carpet kissers, immos, neuro diverse skivers, eco grifters and hirsute dungaree wearing lesbian wheelchair users.
The result of this deeply hate filled relationship with life is that, in the tiny moments of privacy I enjoy away from all of this bullshit, I want to do just what the fuck I want and not be beholden to any cunt. I want to choose where I want to be, who I want to be there with, what I want to spend my money on, what conversations I want to have and with whom, AND what crap I want to acquire for my enjoyment.
This is why I not only do not like receiving gifts from people, I positively fucking resent it. I am writing this on a Sunday morning when I have a rare opportunity to have a coffee and have some playtime on isacunt without anyone bothering me. I’m dressed only in my tattered grundies, I’m unwashed, a shocking fucking mess, and I don’t give a fuck. But one of my members of staff messages me and asks if I’m at home. What the fuck. I ask the missus what this is about, she looks guilty. She realises that she was chatting to the employee in question on Friday as he was going to London on the weekend where his brother in law is a chef in an upmarket restaurant, and he produces some top notch cakes which she politely said sounded wonderful. So, at 8.30am on the one day of the week when I might be expected to get some rest and peace and quiet, the demand is being made of me to get up, throw on some clothes, and be all fake happy and grateful. Fuck that, I’m not doing it. I said to him leave it on the doorstep, sorry I’m not in a state to receive you. He quietly drops the parcel off, a Harrods bag with cake and all sorts of goodies in it, and quietly slopes off. The missus goes and retrieves it and shows me what a cunt I am for not even managing to go and say thanks to him.
So I have, without consultation, been put in the invidious position of either doing something I don’t want to do on my morning off, or being a rude and ungrateful cunt. All for some additional shit in my life that I neither asked for nor wanted.
Whenever anyone gives me a gift I don’t fucking want it, and I consider it an arrogant liberty to demand I pretend to be happy and grateful for this gross imposition on my misery. Take your fucking gifts and stick them up your arses, I’m not gonna be happy and grateful for any cunt.
Nominated by Balsamic Dave.
are cunts and full of cunts.
I’ve just read the music journo equivalent of slurry, fawning over that talentless trollop Charlie XCX in a review of her recent performance at Reading Festival.
“She commanded the stage with a singular focus and was bolstered by a live band in places and a group of dancers; the result was a statement of epic proportions.”
Put your crayon away you intellectual midget and let us reflect here for a moment. Back in the day when I was a festival going kid, Reading was headlined by legends, The Stones, The Yardbirds, The Animals, The Who, Peter Green’s Fleetwood Mac, Cocker, Beck, Marmalade, just a few of the genuine talents to have graced the stage at Reading. What do we have now? A karaoke act with her growler hanging out of her pants. It’s not good enough, note in that review the words, ‘bolstered by a live band IN PLACES’. All I can say is that Gen Z are easily pleased, mind, most of them seem to be as thick as a fucking breeze block. Cunts!
Nominated by Benito Cuntolini.