Selena Gomez

Hi yi yi amigos.
On the signing of Trump executive orders and state of emergency deporting of illegal freeloaders from Mexico,
Multimillionaire actress Selena Gomez filmed herself crying and sobbing for the poor Mexican Cartel gang members being sent back over the border.

This was the typical virtue signalling from someone uneffected by south American villains roaming about
near her home,
What with having a gated mansion and private security.

It also prompted criticism from mums of kids murdered by undocumented illegal immigrants.
Who rightly pointed out

” We don’t remember you crying for the victims”

Shocked that she isn’t universally worshipped and that not everyone accepts every utterance from a Hollyweird airhead,
Ms Gomez went into a sulk.

Here’s a idea señorita.
Use your countless millions to help them if you feel such empathy?
Or
Fuck off to Mexico if you love them so much?

Badges? What badges?
We don’t need no stinking badges!

ladbible

Nominated by Miserable Northern Cunt.

Causing Hoarding and Panic


Just publish a headline like this.

Tesco, Aldi, Asda, Morrisons, Sainsbury’s, Lidl shoppers urged to freeze milk and meat this week

Yahoo News.

Please note, this is NOT advice from the Supermarkets named directly, but simply yet another example of click bait “news”

Apparently, there’s a possibility of power cuts over the next few days, because:

Last week
Blizzard to hit, only 8 Counties will escape Blast.

A few days later
Snow blast in 20 regions

Today
7 regions to be hit by snow blast.

Notice the re-occurring word?
Emotive, isn’t it?

So freeze milk and beef in anticipation of power cuts caused by the incoming snow blast, that might happen, probably, possibly, if there’s an R in the month, because
” We’re doomed, doomed I tell you!”

Nominated by : Jeezum Priest

Saints and Their Pointless Patronages

 

I was watching The Chase the other day and the question ‘St. Matthew is the patron saint of, A: Accountants, B: Candle makers or C: Ferrymen?’ came up. This got me thinking about saints and more particularly the pointless patronages bestowed upon them.

There are the well-known ones like St. George and St. Patrick but there are literally thousands of others covering all manner of jobs, trades, places and afflictions. Button makers? Church cleaners? Dog bites? Florentine cheese merchants? They have you covered. Today for example, Jan 31st is the feast day of St. John Bosco patron saint of schoolchildren, magicians and juvenile delinquency.

I like to think of them in a heavenly type waiting room getting their number from a ticket dispenser waiting for their sainthood.

“Oi, George! What did you get?”

“England mate, fucking get in. You Bonaventure?”

“Bowel disorders. Hilary of Poitiers, I’ll swap you for backward children?”

“No thanks, Fiacre has already tried to palm haemorrhoid sufferers on to me”.

Out of all of them though, I think Our Lady of Perpetual Help who is the patron saint of Haiti must be my favourite because it is so apt. The BBC and the rest of the lamestream media beatified St. George Floyd of Minneapolis some years ago, patron of fentanyl users and respiratory difficulties but its only a matter of time until its official and he gets his own feast day and joins the ranks of celebrating gallstones, lepers and stammering children.

The answer was A, Accountants by the way.

Chin up St. Matthew, it could have been a lot worse.

Catholic online

Nominated by Liberal Liquidator.

David Lammy Reparations Talks

 

Inside men are cunts.
David lammy is a cunt.
Reparations are cunts.
Entertaining these talks is a cunt

Here we have David Lammy (guyanese parents) having talks with Carribean nations who want £18 TRILLION in repararations?

Reparations for what? Helping the locals build up better economies and introducing them to the idea of Britain, They certainly seemed to think it was worth a visit.

GB news

I can understand that these countries recognise Britain is a soft touch and that if they don’t ask they shall not receive, but to have what amounts to an inside man dealing with the talks, smells fishier than carribean salt cod thats been used as Angies tampon.

Nominated by Cunt of the Isles.

Dead Pool [351]

Congratulations to Shaun who correctly predicted the death of the disgraced Tuekish Cypriot fraudster Asil Nadir and has thus won Dead Pool 350.Nadir was the CEo of textile company Polly Peck which folded in 1990.He was jailed for ten years in 2012 for serious fraud while in post .He was transfered back to Turkey in 2016 where he was freed after a day.Nadir was 83 years old and his survived by his wife and children

On to Dead Pool 351

The rules:

1)Pick 5 famous cunts you think will conk out next.No duplicates allowed and it is first come first serve.You can always be a cunt and steal someone elses nominatoons from the previous pool.

2)Anyone who nominates the worlds oldest man or woman is a cunt who we will ignore.

3)It must be a famous cunt we have heard of.

4)No swapping picks mid pool unless they have already been taken.

5)Hits are awarded based on chronology of death reporting and not necessarily in chronology of death.