Health and Safety

 

“A health and safety investigation has been launched into the death of a man who was killed by a tiger after he entered its enclosure.

Yorkshire Wildlife Park was closed over the weekend following reports of a man climbing down into the enclosure from a walkway on Saturday afternoon.”

“”I can confirm that, in line with our statutory duties, the council has launched a health and safety investigation,” a City of Doncaster Council spokesperson said.”

Splendid idea,that should get to the bottom of why an apex predator was able to kill a lunatic.

Dan Swaine, the local authority’s executive director of place, said the council was “deeply saddened” by the incident and sent its “deepest sympathies” to the man’s family and those who were at the scene.

“We are also working with multiple agencies, including the police and health agencies, and are supporting the Yorkshire Wildlife Park in response to the incident,” he said.

Red Tape wins again.

Perhaps the Home Office could house foreigners in the “big cat” enclosure once the appropriate paperwork is in place.

The stupid cunts.

bbcnews

Nominated by Unkle Terry.

Funeral adverts on TV

 

What can I say? Every fucking ad break on the channels I do not watch as a non payer of the telly tax, appears to be advertising funeral plans from some dodgy grifting cunts pretending to be ‘empathetic’. Well, I can tell you now that I am in no way persuaded to pay you 3 grand to stick me in the waste disposal bins on my expiry. I intend to have a magnificent bier of plumed black horses to fly tip me in a location unacceptable to the majority of the population and whoever I decide to leave my not inconsiderable inheritance to can fucking we’ll pay for it.
(Links hopefully added by you magnificent fellow cunters)

independent

Nominated by Kunte kunty, link by Unkle Terry.

Burnham,Brexit and the Ivans

 

Not sure I’ve heard of a bigger pile of excrement,at least not since Starmer smashed the gangs,but it “rolls the pitch” for yet another Modern British pantomime rejoining the EU..

Which is precisely what 98% want.

They shat themselves when the public had a say on it in 2016,didn’t like the result,made a shambles of “Brexit” and have allowed the mess to remain contentious ever since.

Burnham now tells us the Russians had a hand in it all,why not throw the Chinese,Iranians in as well?

“We didn’t know what we were voting for” apparently..

Shit stirring autocratic Cunt.

Single Market oven.

bbcnews

Nominated by Unkle Terry.

Dahir Ibrahim

 

This old charmer has been incarcerted in one of HM Prisons (one of the few), and it seems poor litle Dahir had a pianful knee, so the [rison authorities were very kind to him and gave him some painkillers. Wasn’t that good of\them?. Well, no -ut wasn’t because they had the cheek to give this convicted sex offender (who looked at porn sites to improve his English) his medication during the fasting period in Ramadam, so the injured cowson decided to sue the authorties. Now had I been the judge, I would have told him to fuck off – you too, I imagine. Not this court. They upheld his complaint:

Just how\much more nonsence is this gormless government going to take from immigrants, full stop, still less sex criminals.

express

Nominated by W C Boggs.

Chancellor John Healey

 

As I write this, the Budget is a mere 24 hours away, so time for the, now traditional, drip, drip of information to whet the appetites of this government’s adoring public.
Aside from the obvious tactic of avoiding political suicide by freezing fuel duty, our esteemed chancer, sorry, chancellor, has come up with a sure fire solution to the cost of living crisis.
A reduction of taxes on foodstuff ‘staples’
Sounds fantastic.
Or is it?
According to the BBC, the list of products the government is removing tariffs on includes:

Baked beans
Garlic
Gherkins
Chocolate-coated wafers and waffles
Boiled sweets
Toffees, caramels and similar sweets
Citrus jams, marmalades and pastes
Throat pastilles and cough drops
Plant-based drinks including soya, nut, cereal or seed
Kerosene
Fertilisers

A tax reduction on fertilisers may offer some relief to beleaguered farmers, and the same on cereal products sounds sensible, but can you see anything else on that list that will help anyone outside of Islington?
Apparently, families could save up to a massive £21 a year.
That should help kick start the economy, shouldn’t it?
Is this cunt for real?
Sadly, it would appear he is.
Dear me.

bbcnews

Nominated by Field Marshall Cuntgomery.