What sort of ethereal entity wastes it’s time haunting an eighteenth century coaching inn or the derelict insane asylum in which they died, when they could nip across the solar system to witness the majestic beauty of the rings of Saturn and still be back in time to catch Rachel Riley fingering herself in the shower…
Mugs.
Nominated by: J R Cuntley
They charge upwards of £2.50 a pack. You can buy supermarket brands for about 25p. They are exactly the same – they have to be by law!
Also they have started this ‘ targeted pain ‘ bollocks. It’s nonsense. It’s just the same stuff in the packets and it doesn’t ‘target’ pain. Aren’t they breaking some law? Don’t buy it!
Nominated by: Ozmandias
Rock group Green Day say they “fully support” the protests against US president elect Donald Trump.
“I don’t think any of us were prepared for Donald Trump to be president,” singer Billie Joe Armstrong told the BBC.
“I think there’s going to come a time when the protests get larger and larger – and that I fully support.”
The star, who has been an outspoken critic of Mr Trump, said he felt like his “country is being set on fire”.
Green Day frontman Billie Joe Armstrong publicly supported Hillary Clinton in the presidential race, branding her the only choice while calling Donald Trump “evil.”
He tells Beats 1: “There’s only one choice for me and that’s Hillary Clinton. What a lot of liberals need to understand is there’s never been a candidate that has come this far that has had this much of a liberal and a progressive agenda.
“Just because she has just got this baggage that comes along with her, and it’s not even really baggage, compared to Donald Trump she is basically a school teacher.
Wall street establishment child rapist defence council Hilary either did a really good job of pulling the wool over your eyes or your a paid up establishment shrill.
By the way your music is a parody of anything potent and your a massive cunt.
Nominated by: Sixdog Vomit
Firstly a degree of inteligence is required for breaking and entering, admittedly its not an art I study but the thick cunt didnt listen to his tutor that well.
Said cunt approached my garage in the small hours of Thursday armed with hammer and screw driver, he then ignored his tutors advice and bashed the implement between the upper frame and door slightly off center, bending the frame….he then successfully re adjusted his aim and smashed the inner staple off the frame and defeating the flimsy security of the structure.
What happened next well we can only guess, but my assumption is that said fuckwhit got a bit over zealous yanking the door open and twisted it jamming it in the frame with an opening of 4 inches and fled.
Well Mr Burglar you sir are a fuckwhit and a prize cunt,
1, you bodged the first attempt
2, you then jammed the door trying to open it
3, you left over £1,000 + of power tools in “loot” just an arms length away.
and most of all you showed me exactly how to break into the bloody thing, so a quick buzz down to B&Q £8 worth of angle iron bolted to the top frame stops the old cole chisel trick and a nice big defender bar at the bottom adds to the equasion.
My initial thought on surveying the damage was, “why don’t they just get a job” but on closer inspection I decided that they were proper thick cunts so unemployable, I would suggest a career move to stealing copper from sub stations in future.
Nominated by: Lord Benny
Not content with acquiring major British confectionery brands, the fuckers have removed the Toffee Deluxe from what was Mackintosh’s Quality Street. They’ve ignored the old adage “If it ain’t broke, don’t mend it.”
Bah fucking humbug. Christmas wrecking, meddling CUNTS!
Nominated by: Alan Fistula