I could spend time singling out prize cunts one by one. As my time fades away I may regret the wasted time. So here is a catchall, boilerplate cuntification for the sloppy beta male cuckold bitch cunts of the LEFT.

If you know such a person (and you shouldn’t really, interacting with them only encourages further hypocrisy and vapid pointless pontification) you have a responsibility to will them to die of atrophic lateral sclerosis with a mouth full of cocks.

If you are one you must find a way to hasten your demise. You could seek out a political protestor to do it for you (unfortunately Mr D T Traitors Freedom F Britain will be unable to assist you in your transition to being dead on account of serving some time in jail for helping Jo Cox to become an hero). Or you could just drink a gallon of bleach.

I have a non exhaustive list of key indicators to help you identify the limp lame and utterly useless cunts;

1. Never knowingly held a belief that could be close to correct. Left cunts.
2. Only love social conservatism when practiced by brown people? Left cunt.
3. Academic? Left cunt.
4. Never accomplished anything worthwhile (see academic)? Left cunt.
5. Bleating on about the NHS or other public sector train wrecks? Left cunt.
6. Never knowlingly held an opinion of your own? Left cunt.
7. Beard with product in? Left cunt.
8. On a lame protest for cunts about other cunts? Guess.

You may on reading this realise you are a left cunt. It’s unlikely as most left cunts come with gravity defying self denial but possible. Know this; you are a cunt; your friends are all cunts; your mum is a cunt.

Nominatwd by Fuckwit

Pointless Posh `explorers’ With No Sense of Direction

Another day, another prattish posho with a chiselled jaw but no sense of direction is pointlessly wandering around Antartica, trying to do what exactly? Ben Saunders, 40, (40! He’s too bloody old for this nonsense!) is apparently `perilously close to running out of food’ and his family back in Blighty are frantic with worry.

Bizarrely, he is making this futile foray into the wilderness `in memory’ of his friend, fellow pointless explorer Colonel Henry Worsley, who died wandering round the South Pole trying to break some kind of record in 2016, leaving behind a widow and 2 children.

He follows hot on the heels of Benedict Allen who cunted off to find a lost tribe without any GPS equipment or a phone. Never mind the fact his wife and young kids were frantic with worry: he apparently deliberately went walkabout in an ‘old school’ manner as he wanted some alone time and ‘space’.

Typical bloody man. Why not just go to the pub like a normal person? Or get a shed?

A friend told a newspaper: ‘For people like Ben it’s about finding out more about yourself.’

He’s 57! If he doesn’t yet know himself, he never will. Explorers are supposed to be interested in the world, not their own navel.

Meanwhile, Sir Ranulph Fiennes was feted by the press for having to chop his own fingers off after getting frostbite while climbing a mountain somewhere. It’s not heroic, it’s stupid!

In 2003, Steven Boultby Brooks and his pal Quentin Smith were trying to break a ridiculous record for something and had to be rescued in Antartica by the Royal Navy after crashing their helicopter into the sea. And don’t get me started on Mark Thatcher.

`Exploring’ is just an excuse for under-employed old Etonians with trustfunds and mid-life crises to stumble around the planet before being rescued by plebs at the tax payers expense.

None of these cunts has a sense of direction that matches their sense of entitlement. Why are we even bothering to rescue them in the first place?

Nominated by Caro