Special assistance at airports

 

A cunt or not a cunt?

Some while ago I cunted getting trough airports for the many different stages which passengers had to go through, horrendous queues, Diego cops, facial recognition finger printing and a several mile walk carrying the same weight as a SAS Bergen in the Brecon Beacons on their selection March.

I was sick of it and decided that I to would allow some person to wheel me in a chair through all said obstacle’s and allow Mrs E/C to carry the afore mentioned Bergen or pack less fucking weight.

I wrote on here that it went well breezing through checkpoint Charlie and all the other ones involved, sometimes skipping the eye recognition and finger print stages altogether just because I put on a gormless face, dribbled from my mouth and used an inhaler.

A few weeks ago I buggered off to the canary islands for a post summer holiday. Did the wheeze work as well?
Our plane was delayed for half and hour because of the large number of assisted travellers on board. Oh dear. Biggles then made up the time by burning up more fuel and speeding, the naughty boy.

On arrival at EMA a woman collected me and wheeled me to the meet and greet parking lot and then onto my car. What a woman. 10/10
Thank goodness she fucked off before I opened the boot where my golf clubs where lain. So yes I’m a cunt but assisted travel is brill.

Nominated by Everyonesacunt.

kim Rose Gosport

 

There’s a advert on GB News for a pawnbrokers called Kim Rose,
kim stars as himself.

this advert sets my teeth on edge.

The repulsive kim (girls name) is approached by some young bodybuilder called George who’s been left some jewellery by a recently deceased relative and wants to know the value of what he describes as ‘this scrap’
the ungrateful cunt.

Kim who has a face full of warts Lemmy would be envious of, and wears white suits then goes into a completely irrelevant monologue
about how in 1976 he had a car and 50 quid.

while this flashback to 1976 is happening
what sounds like Dire straits is blaring out.

It does make sense.
also I hate Dire Straits,
anyone in a white suit is a bona fide twat an wannabe ice cream man.

just tell the cunt what its worth you fuckin pikey.

island echo

Nominated by miserable Northern cunt link Unkle Terry.

Russell Brand [15]


Old Rasputin features is once more in Allegations Land, generally accused of sexual assault and rape over a period of years. Nice to have the now very grey beard cunt back in the frame after those attention seeking early years where he seemed to have opinions on everything and intelligence, none. Cringe at the memory of the cunt’s loudmouth smartypantsness. Appeared as a controversial talking head here there and everywhere. Good riddance we thought until his past caught up with him.

These days fellow cunters you can never keep a good rape claim down. Much money to be made in The Courts me dears and the fair sex are all at it – the monetizing husseys. What is an old roue (should have and acute “e” but alas my old imperial keyboard is without”) to do but pay up and keep taking the tablets. (in Brand’s case antibiotics and Viagra).

Note on Viagra (other brands available) – an old cunt of my acquaintance gets them prescribed on the NHS by a very nubile young filly of a GP and is now permanently on the horn. Has been stopped recently for shoplifting after being spotted shuffling around the Co-Op with his hands suspiciously clasped over his groin. At least his prowess has been recorded and shared around local stores.

Be careful of what you ask for.

BBC News?

Nominated by : Sir Limply Stoke

Lesbian covid masked require bar.

is a cunt.

spiked

Seems some sexually confused types set up a safe place type bar for other sexually confused folk and as part of this the bar was COVID safe(you know where I’m going with this don’t you.)

Yep masks, you had to wear them to go in seems the end of the Wuhan sniffle never arrived in the safe bar for sexually confused folk.

Well shocker said bar started losing money, one of the partners left to join a clown school (no I’m not joking here) the other is running around doing lots of jobs to help fund bills and comes up with the idea of relaxing the mask rules.

Well we can’t have sanity and the customers, the few not spending enough to cover the bills then lose their shit. Cue social media shit storm and vast amounts of abuse as the very idea of unmasking is on a par with murder or misuse of pronouns or some shit.

Anyway watching the left eat themselves was hilarious and amused me, were I planning a trip to America I’d pop in but fear it’ll be closed by the time I get there.

Nominated by Paul Goddard.

Arrogance rewarded via ludicrous legal dispensation

 

is a cunt.

If I were to sum this nommed situation up with a single emoji, it’d be this one : 🤪

Cunt, 36, male. Up on charges of possessing a large collection of scumbag pics ‘n’ vids (circa 1,600 / 84) in three separate devices, so no ‘accident’ (as if, anyways!) …. the kind of pics/vids he might have gotten from gary glitter or huw edwards, right, …

First appearance before a judge on the matter?

Cheeky enough to ask his address be witheld ‘to keep him safe due to the nature of his crimes’ which isn’t his right in this case, but was granted by the judge anyways … bad enough, .. but merely an appetizer for the real humdinger.

You see, the judge ordered this cunts passport be confiscated/surrendered in order for him to stay out on bail now that he’s going to trial. Then his defence-cunt I mean lawyer .. piped-up with the following ..

He had the fucking AUDACITY to bring up that the man had a “previously arranged holiday” booked for 9-19 October. (A holiday booked *since* his arrest, which the article doesn’t mention btw).

And instead of saying ‘Tough shit, creepo’.. ;

The judge ordered that his passport be returned by the cops TO the accused on October 8th but that he “must return it to Sligo Garda Station on October 20th”.

Then – IF the cunt comes back, his case is due November 26.

Think about it. Condition of ongoing bail? .. passport confiscated … which is done to prevent a cunt leaving the country and/or fleeing, presumably. But this guy can HAVE IT BACK for nigh-on two weeks in the meantime specifically so he can go abroad, destination undisclosed & unrequested by the looks of it.

While out on bail for serious charges.

Did the fact his daddy is a retired judge have any bearing? Who knows.

It’s utterly-daft cuntery either way.

ie news

Nominated by Cuntemall.