“Good afternoon. This is IsAC’s Rural Affairs Correspondent Ron Knee reporting. Today I’m in Charnwood Forest in Leicestershire, where local residents are up in arms about a plan to site a giant solar energy farm in the area. I’m joined by Mrs Brenda Tosspott, spokesperson for local campaign group ‘Over My Dead Body; No to the Solar Farm’. Thank you for joining us”

“We’re not having it, and that’s that, sure as my name’s Brenda Tosspott. The developers can fuck right off”

“But surely this is a good move, aimed at reducing dependence on fossil fuels, and helping to fight against global warming”

“Well of course we all want to fight climate change, just not do it right here in our neck of the woods. It’s the wrong scheme in the wrong place. We’re all against it”

“Isn’t the truth of it that you’re all just being NIMBYs?”

“Naturally we’ll be called that, but this is an area of outstanding natural beauty, a
haven for wildlife and agriculture, which must be protected at all costs. The fact that we don’t want our views ruined and the value of our properties affected by this development is neither here nor there”

“I see. So what’s your solution to the dilemma then?”

“Quite simple. Don’t build the bastard here. There’s another area of outstanding natural beauty about twenty miles up the road. Put the cunt there, we say”

“Quite so. Anywhere but here in your village. Thank you Mrs Tosspott. This is Ron Knee, for IsAC, returning you to the studio”

Daily Mail

Nominated by: Ron Knee

These useless cunts want to slap a so-called “one off” surcharge of £16 in the bills of all domestic users in order to “protect suppliers falling massively into debt” or perhaps even going bust completely, as we’ve seen with 15 smaller suppliers over the last 2 or 3 years.

OFCUNT has also raised the Price Cap from £1834 to £1928 on a typical duel-fuel household as of 1st January, due to a spike in wholesale fuel prices.

A lot of suppliers (British Gas, Octopus, So Energy, EDF, Scottish Power etc.) are struggling with debts, some of which are due to domestic customers not being able to afford to pay their bills!

Therefore, the brains from OFWANK came up with the idea of this £16 supplement/tax that will affect everyone, including those who can’t pay their bills! There is plenty of government support already for those struggling with their cost of living bills. And there’s also the option of prepayment meters.

Therefore, it begs the question as to why those who do pay their bills on time are being penalised for being prudent?

Perhaps banks and building societies will do the same with mortgages and credit cards – slap a £200 supplement on the good payers to cover the debts from those who can’t!

And who is to say this “one off” surcharge won’t happen again?

OFGEM are total wankers!

Gov.uk

Nominated by Technocunt.

A nomination – not for Stephen Fry or even the anti-Semites attacking him – but the very stupid Channel 4 ‘Alternative’ Christmas Message, or should that be ‘(ego) massage’.

It’s like something Rwik from the Young Ones dreamed up, because he disapproves of the ‘fascist junta’ in Downing Street.

It all smacks of Guardian-reading tosspots shouting ‘Rwevo-looshun!’ in their nan’s face.

This idea has never been a good one, just more posturing by the daft producers at C4, and recruiting Establishment cunts such as Bercow in 2019, the year The Alternative went more mainstream than the Queen. Fry is also a solidly mainstream figure, but his message about attacks on Jews in Britain seems to have triggered legions of <del>Nazis</del> typical Channel 4 viewers who thought he’d say how being gay is great, trans women are women, gay-black is God’s work and Refugees are welcome. They weren’t told this, they were ade to feel bad after their Christmas nut roast, and now they’re punching their keyboards and spitting bile to their megapixel phone cams.

This infantile reaction could only come from the sort of edgy cunt who consciously watches an ‘Alternative’ Christmas message, be it by Marge Simpson or some fucking robot, or the university-on-fucked-up-legs Fry.

It’s the same mentality that gave rise to the alternative Christmas no.1 to stop Cowell’s poppets dominating every year. The first year was a success, even if it was a band who bump their ticket prices up to stop the poor from seeing them (although did any working class kids ever like RATM?) Of course, the ego of the musical know-betters, the punk rock/NME aristocracy, led to subsequent campaigns branching off and Cowell’s foetus topping the charts anyway.

This desire to be The Alternative (rather than an alternative) is now reflected in the big post-speech spaz-out.

A million blue-haired and monobrowed religious freaks crying out in rage as Stephen Fry dares chastise their chums who just want to give <i>die Juden</i> a good kicking. This is not <i>my</i> alternative Christmas message! how dare you!

That is your average channel 4 viewer though; entitled, middle-class, far left whinging cunts, almost educated in ‘studies’ far beyond their natural abilities.

Time Channel 4 packed this shit in. Want a zchristmas message then stick to Charlie, otherwise shut the fuck up and eat your sprouts.

Express News

Nominated by: Cuntamus Prime

The Met Office definition of a white Christmas is a pile of wank.

We’ve had record high December temperatures in many parts of the UK, where the weather has felt more like spring than the depths of winter. And yet, because a couple of places in Scotland happened to receive a small smattering of snow, an official white Christmas has been declared.Even though most of the UK hasn’t been anywhere close to getting the stuff since the cold snap last month.

The cunts have form for this too. Why are they so desperate to declare a white Christmas every year to the point of setting the criteria at a single FLAKE? What do they actually get out of it?

I know it’s a trivial cunting all things considered but it’s clear the wankers have some sort of agenda for whatever reason.

BBC News

Nominated by: OpinionatedCunt