Cyclists are total and utter bell-ends. They seem to think that they own the bloody road,pedalling along in groups making overtaking virtually impossible. They jump red lights,ignore road signs and get quite snippy when you pull up in front of them to get out and explain to them what you think of their bellendery.

Well,you wannabe Bradley Wiggenses,you can all fuck off with your cunt-containing lycra, foreskin helmets and general total wanker attitude.

As for the prick who told me this morning that he had my” threatening behaviour” on camera,you’re just lucky that you don’t have a fucking good view of your lower digestive tract on camera.

Nominated by: Dick Fiddler

I fucking loathe the Lycra benders. They use the dual carriageway by me for time trials, the zoned out cunts. These pricks then think that the road, a busy main A road, is just for them, and traffic should give them all consideration and right of way. All these pricks care about is their time, so road positioning and indicating, or any of the rules of the road go out the fucking window, the riding four abreast cunts.

Pushbikes, especially those ridden by a pointy hatted, immac legged ponce, should not be allowed on a road where they have to compete with 70 mph traffic.

Team sky? Team cunt more like.

Nominated by: Gutstick Japseye

Anyone riding a bicycle over the age of 16 is a cunt. Not only do they not pay any road tax nor have insurance but they don’t have to pass a test to ride on the roads. Not that this is a problem as most think its OK to ride on the pavement instead.

They don’t stop at red lights and they view the rest of the highway code merely as suggestions which may be disregarded as it suits. They expect roads to be closed down so they can pursue their puffy hobby thus inconveniencing proper people who actually pay for the roads in the first place.

But the real clincher, the thing which gets right on my tits is their holier than thou, condescending and completely misplaced and erroneous assertion that they are actually doing something good, something worthwhile. They have evolved to a higher state of consciousness and are actually saving the planet and all us un-enlightened plebs from ourselves. Wrong, cunt! You are playing around on a kids toy and getting in everybodys’ way while you are about it.

Nominated by: Fat Rich

WTF is it with cyclists who listen to their iPods while driving along the road. Do these cunts have a death wish? How the fuck do they expect to hear what’s going on around them?

And headphone wearers are worst of all. Especially designer headphones. “Look at me! I’ve got £200 headphones on! I’ve got more money than sense, I’m a poser AND I have a death wish!”

Squash the stupid cunts…

Nominated by: Dioclese