Sir Keir Starmer [20]

Good ol’ Sir Kweer, he’s always good for a laugh, and he’s at it again, getting into a muddle once more on the trans issue.

A while ago, he was telling us that ‘it’s not right’ to say that only a woman can have a cervix. Now I’m no anatomical expert but as I understand it, the cervix is the lower end of the uterus which forms a channel to the vagina. Well I don’t know about you Sir Knobhead, but it seems to me that being female is an essential quality for possessing those bits of kit.

Now to clarify matters further for us, he’s declared that ‘of course 99.9% of women don’t have penises’. Well, the female population of Great Britain in 2023 is a little over 35,000,000, which according to Stormin’ Starmer, means that 35,000 women in the country DO have a penis in their pants.

And there was me, naively thinking that 100% of women in Britain were dickless. I’m sure that you’ll all join me in thanking the Labour leader for clearing that misunderstanding up for us.

To coin a phrase; what a cock.

Daily Fail Link.

Nominated by : Ron Knee

Being Triggered By Clarkson

A cunting for the poor little darlings who got upset over Jeremy Clarkson and a rather well written piece about, who else, MeAgain.

It seems the reference to the game of thrones scene where the ‘shamed’ queen was forced to go through the streets naked and was pelted with shit didn’t go down well.

Clarkson has issued a statement on Twatter, basically ooops sorry, will do better next time, fucking hilarious.

6000 complaints apparently, nice one Jeremy 👍

Manchester Evening News Link.

Nominated by : Sick of it

Baroness Mone

Former saucy pants Czarina and walking facelift and booblift influencer (don’t have them ladies) Michelle Mone (now Baroness Mone OBE ‘for services to the Lingerie Industry” I kid you not due to enoblement at the suggestion of David Cameron) has been caught up in the PPE scandal re supply of dodgy and unuseable medical gowns at extortionate prices during the Covid Emergency.

My Lady has taken “a leave of absence from The Lords” due to certain embarrassments resulting from allegations of stuffing her crotchless knickers and those of her family with non legit moolah at a time of crisis for the nation. She is an astute business woman so what better time to rip off the nation than at a time of crisis….Surely not another Tory Spiv?

Falls into a theme of a golden pathway of Fast Track Contracts provided by HMG for those with close connections to the Tory Government to the exclusion of experienced and efficient suppliers. Pigs in a private trough funded by the taxpayer sort of thing.

Medpro is the company in question and the Honorable Lady denies any connection to wrongdoing. Very large sums of moolah (£200 mill+) are at the centre of the allegations.

Grauniad Link.

Nominated by : Sir Limply Stoke

Awaab Ishak’s Parents

Right- this is NOT a cunting for this young lad.

It is a cunting for his parents, who have not come across mould and the causes of it due to them being just another couple of immigrants…this time from Somalia, where presumably fucking mud huts and a warm climate don’t contribute to mould. Neither does having to worry about your hut having an indoor shower/bath, flushing toilet and water on tap. No sir……mould is alien to them. Until of course they come to the land of plenty where they are given a nice free property with all those water fed luxuries, which of course also can cause mould if you don’t ventilate the property correctly. I have always found it peculiar that when you read a news story about someone complaining about mould, you just know it’s going to be a council place. Why is it only council houses that suffer from mould? Or could it be the residents are in it all day doing fuck all with the heating cranked up, windows shut, with the washer/dryer going and some munter having her weekly shower?

What really pisses me off though, is the comments from the father (interpreted by the way, as they cunt can’t even speak English) whereby he calls the council racist (didn’t take him long to employ the narrative did it?) and basically doing nothing to help his family.

Ungrateful cunt..fuck off back to Somalia where mould is a luxurious dream.

Nominated by: Chuff Chugger

Seconded by : Cuntstable Cuntbubble

To add to Chuff’s comments.

”Awaab Ishak: Mould in Rochdale flat caused boy’s death, coroner rules”

Sad but:-

Mould can be dealt with.
Ventilation, not having wet clothes hanging about.
Opening windows.
A cheap spray which kills the spores and growth.
But no. They did fuck all.

These cunts were smothered in social workers etc who identified the problem, did fuck all to rectify it themselves. (Its the council’s/housing association’s problem) and now, undoubtedly with the help of some white woke cunt cry racism. In fucking Rochdale which is 50% Parking Stanley.

This child’s death is 100% due to the stupid, non English speaking family. No doubt Somalia would have sorted it if they fucked off back there.

Dreadful Treatment of Migrants

I know we are often light hearted on here but the following harrowing tale puts things in perspective. (Go on, we’re listening – NA)

‘Staying here is intolerable’: the truth about asylum seeker hotels”

This concerns the dreadful treatment of Ali, who has fled religious persecution (??) in Iran, desperately crossed 8 or 9 countries to reach our shores.
He is banged up in a Berkshire hotel where:-

”The food is repetitive, his fellow guests never leave, the streets of Reading rarely change. “There is nothing to do. Nothing happens”

Yes, the racist bastards of Reading never change the streets for him.
He has been banged up here for 489 days with only complete freedom, food and a money allowance to cling to.

We should be ashamed of ourselves and can thank the Guardian for bringing this to our attention. If you open the attached make sure you have hankies at the ready.

MSN Link.

Another MSN Link. (Additional link provided by Jeezum Priest)

Nominated by: Cuntstable Cuntbubble