Americanisms of the Useless Variety [5]

Disturbing rise of useless americanisms


If I saw 25 build large mansion supporters smacking the shit out of a random white person…..what would you do?

I’d turn 360 degrees and walk away.

Hang on? You’d walk straight at them, 360 degrees is not 2x better than 180 you directionless cunt. How does this creep in? Is their maths really that bad.

Classic others were, I could care less; what did you say? Yep full fucking retard.

Declutter, erm tidy perhaps?
Irregardless. You seem a bit over antonymed up there friend.
He is the winningest Coach. Err excuse me? What language do you use?
Birder who goes Birding. An ornithologist or twitcher or birdwatcher perhaps.

The windows are open the mouth moves but MISTER brain has long since departed.

I am unsure if the full level of retard hasn’t been accomplished yet, but if you think John Oliver is original then anything is possible.

(“Reaching out” instead of “contact” really makes my skin crawl. – NA)

Nominated by: Get fucked BLM

Ethnic Diversity (Again)

I am sick to fucking death of this fucking shit being rammed down our throats on a daily basis. The latest load of bollocks is the crew of the Mary Rose which sank nearly 500 years ago “was more ethnically diverse than previously thought” according to research. And what startling piece of evidence is this based on? Apparently they have discovered that THREE crew members “may have come from southern European coasts, Iberia and North Africa.” That’s a grand total of three possibly non-British crew out of a total of 179 remains of bodies they have found which equates to 1.68%. One of the researches in particular seems to be getting her knickers all fizzy with this astounding revelation: “However, we never expected this diversity to be so rich.” For fucks sake, give us a break.

Nominated by: Cupid Stunt The First

Megs & Harry [9]

Megs & Harry two for one special

After shunning the limelight to move to the sleepy village of Los Angeles to enjoy their private life. They’re back (after what a week?)

Meghan is writing a book about a poem she originally wrote on father’s day for Harry. Good job she didn’t write it for her own dad as HG Wells has already written the invisible man and she’d be done for copyright infringement.

But wait there’s more! this Sunday YOU can tune in to watch Vax Live (it’s pre-recorded not live) and see a bunch of millionaires telling you to donate money. The event raised $53.8 (£38.8 million) for Covax, which is working to provide vaccines for low and middle-income countries.

You know if you’d just given a million each you could have raised it yourself, stayed at home and ordered a takeaway you rich attention seeking fucks. Also they only invited people who’d had the vaccine, which probably rules out the target audience of who they’re trying to help as they couldn’t attend.

Nominated by: Lazybiscuits

Deluded Instagram Sluts

Deluded Instagram sluts are cunts.
Every selfie obssessed whore who nowadays call themselves a writer,model,influencer etc….FUCK OFF!!

Taking selfies does not make you a model.
Writing Facebook updates does not make you a writer.
And just cos tons of guys use you page to jerk over does not make you a cunting influencer!!

Even Peter Sutcliffe would not have wasted his time on these pigs.

Nominated by: Kendo Nagasaki

Andy Burnham [8]

With his eye make-up ever ready, a Mayoral cunting please for Andy Burnham (the man who would be next Prime Minister if only Dame Keir would fuck off). Yesterday, writing on that ever – entertaining wonderland of fun, Labour List, the baggy-snatched Rachel Reeves, spoke with great eloquence (inspired by her leaders Mother Superior-like distaste for “sleaze”) that “fish rots from the head down”.. How true, but Reeves, like her boss, who she loves to be obsequious to, only spies rotting fish from without – never within. In my view any party that had Keith Vaz and Peter Mandelson in it’s ranks should think twice before using the word sleaze. I wonder, when they are at the ultra-pious stage what their Ladyships make of this story, that Burnham does nothing to stop two of the Rotherham child sex criminals to stay in his territory, even though he has the powers to take action:

Link to story here.

Diversity is our strength. Oh yes…..

Nominated by: W. C. Boggs