118 118 need to be cunted. I don’t think I have ever used it and when I checked how much the cunts charge I never will. £3.49 per call and £3.49 per minute thereafter (minimum 1 minute) apparently so I think they charge you best part of £7 for a fucking number. What a load of cunts.

Who the dumb cunts are who call them I don’t know, why not Google the number for free and if your an old cunt with no phone ask/ring some cunt who can look it up for you. It’s one of those situations where I don’t know who the biggest cunts are? 118 118 or the people who use it. It’s no wonder they have now moved into money lending after ripping off all these cunts.

I remember those two annoying 70s athlete lookalike cunts in the Mews where I live running up and down like a pair of cunts, with all the Media cunts in the Office below me lapping it all up like a load of cunts. ‘Got your number’ yeah I got yours as well, you cunts.

Nominated by: Black and White cunt

A cunting for the “Unnamed Passenger”

Apparently at Wallsend Metro station some eastern european had been drunk,hassling women,begging and generally being a cunt. The station announcer had told the cunt over the tannoy to cut it out and that his behaviour might be acceptable in his own country,but it wasn’t here.

Although admitting that the man was causing trouble, one brave “unnamed passenger” had been left so “shocked,upset and offended” that they felt the need to report the announcer for racism.

What a fucking twat.

Nominated by: Dick Fiddler

T’aint this Capitalist world wondrous me dears. For every need up springs a market. Now doine me neck orf the woods the seasonal field work is slowing until the Christmas period and many orf the migrant fillies are looking for a spot orf sex work to tide them over until they start the turkey plucking. Simple rural ways.

Many orf these fillies are Rumanian, indeed quite a colony orf ’em and they range from the decrepit to the well worth thinking about or at least getting a supply orf antibiotics in from me quack. Fly in the ointment is that the prozzies are not self employed if you get me drift. They work under the aegis orf some Rumanian cunt who tours the area in a battered Merc towing a caravan in which to offer the necessary. Must admit I orn occasion turn a nice few quid orf the cunt by allowing access to me barns and stables and hiring oit riding crops and leather saddles and such like.

Problem is el cunto is as dodgy as they come and I know he is robbing me blind. The cunt is connected and half the county depends orn him and his mates for a steady supply orf field labour so we have to take it. Did I hear you say Plod? Bollocks to that. All deep in the cunt’s pocket. Anyway you cunts depend on such arrangements for your meat and two veg. Gangland extortion in rural England shock horror.

Roll orn Christmas.

Nominated by: Sir Limply Stoke