Australia is a cunt.

Australia, land of biodiversity and a white non native government is a cunt for wanting to kill a harmless pigeon which allegedly had made its way from the alleged home of the free world, USA.

Now it has since transpired that the pigeon had a fake leg ring on it https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.bbc.com/news/amp/world-australia-55660592 but the non native white government declared the immigrant pigeon in question to be a threat to national security and stated that it must be captured and destroyed.

This same government which has a similar and admirable immigration policy towards humans, except birds by their nature are migratory creatures and like to summer and winter in different places, A bit like my local geese and politicians.

This pigeon was a massive threat to Australia, a risk to the wildlife of which is mostly deadly or violent anyway, Biting spiders, Hissing snakes and boxing kangaroos.

So it would have been destroyed if caught. By this reasoning i feel all sideways talking non natives should be destroyed and until then, Australia is a bigger cunt than Kylies well greased and fragrant cunt.

Nominated by: Cunt of all trades

I nominate Keith Allen and the song Vindaloo, and all the cunt actors that appear in that pop video. This appeared as a recommendation on YouTube. I watched it and felt sick. That’s when the rot set in. Labour supporting Luvvie cunts trying to be popular.

Keith Allen is a Welsh cunt. If history could be rewritten everything half decent he has done should have been performed by Robert Llewellyn and this annoying cunt should have died 40 years ago.

It was made in 1998 and features many cunt actors of the day: Keith Allen, Paul Kaye (Dennis Pennis), a young Lily Allen, David Wallaims and Matt Lucas (In their Mash and Peas Sweaters).

There are 2 actors portraying Max Wall as Professor Wallofski presumably because John Cleese was too expensive to do a funny walk. Do these air head cunts even know who Max Wall was?

The only ones I could stand were Rowland Rivron as a guardsman and allegedly Malcolm Hardee is in the video but I can’t see him.

Nominated by :Anton Pillar

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=va6nPu-1auE&ab_channel=UnionSquareMusic

A nomination for Enfield council’s Labour Group.

This comes courtesy of the Guido Fawkes website.

On Monday (11th January), Labour councillor Ann Brown was suspended by Labour Group Chief Whip Claire Stewart. Her heinous crime? She abstained, as a matter of conscience, in a vote to award a pay rise of up to £7,608 to her fellow Labour councillors. The Labour Group then voted to support Stewart’s decision.

Some of those who voted to support their Chief Whip are beneficiaries of the pay rise and apparently, they didn’t declare their financial interest, which could have made them ineligible to vote because, y’know, conflict of interest.

Isn’t it comforting to know that, in a time when thousands of businesses are closed, some of which will never re-open, that the priority of Labour councillors in Enfield, is to fill their pockets. And then cynically vote to punish one of their own colleagues for having a moral compass. What a bunch of cunts.

Nominated by: Quick Draw McGraw 

https://order-order.com/2021/01/13/labour-councillor-suspended-after-refusing-to-back-politician-pay-rise/

Tell the story again. The mobile broke on the telly downstairs. An opportunity to get rid. Mrs Plastic can watch her rubbish upstairs.

Decided also to leave the radio on Classic FM. Trouble is we often have a late dinner. And I often sit down with it just in time.

Just in time for John fucking Suchet and his beloved Beethoven. ‘Beethoven the Man Revealed’ 2 fucking hours it is from 7 to 9. Just when you desperately want music to calm the nerves and wind down to all you have is Ludwig’s crash, bang, walloping.
The deafness he suffered, the struggles he endured. He loves all that does John.

What is it about him….? Its just so pom de pom de pom… the melodies do nothing for me. They don’t go anywhere. He wrote the ‘Pastoral Symphony’ but it doesn’t evoke the pastoral for me. He doesn’t evoke anything for me. Its just the violins working off a phrase but it doesn’t build to anything. Not like say in Mozart. The ‘movement’ is always circular with Beethoven -round and round then it will abruptly end.

Is he supposed to be Romantic? There’s nothing touching in it. It’s all too big and thrusting (his music that is). I’ve got to say I don’t even care for the famous Fifth Symphony. DA DA DA DAAAAH DA DA DA DA DAAAAH.

Don’t bother.

I like lush orchestral work like Vaughan Williams. Something as I say to calm the nerves. Or choral works, religious works to sooth the spirit.

This isn’t anti German. I’ve really grown to appreciate Bach. There’s a sprightly rhythm to his stuff. I love Mozart. Russian music, European Classical music really. But it’s this cunt at the centre I don’t relate to.

Also he gave the EU it’s anthem so he’s a cunt by default.

Nominated by: Miles Plastic 

(Never fear: the woke will revise history and show he was a person of colour – DA)
The Pastoral Symphony is an absolutely beautiful piece of music. The end. – NA

Today’s deserving recipient of a good cunting is Sir Keir Starmer the alleged Leader of the Opposition.

‘Opposition’ is defined as ‘a contrast or antithesis’, which you’d be forgiven for thinking would mean offering something distinct from this Government of nodding Churchill dogs. Not so for Starmer, a living tribute to ‘Brilliant Beige’ on the Dulux paint chart.

His fans simper about how he’s so ‘forensic’, which I’m sure is great if you’re swabbing Leicester’s cottage queens for Keith Vaz’s salty deposits, but less so if you actually want to know what you’re voting for.

His shadow cabinet – Starmie’s Angels – are about as satisfying as a pack of Asda Smartprice sausages, and with a depressingly similar amount of filler. Anneliese Dodds, the shadow chancellor, has Hugh Fearnley-Whittingstall as her personal stylist, whilst beloved gob-on-a-stick David Lammy continues his career of blaming everything from council tax to Waitrose running out of papayas on being black. The most exciting character, and I use that word advisedly, is Deputy Leader Angela Rayner – voice sponsored by the Mersey Ferries foghorn.

Anyway, back to the man himself; he made a fairly content-free speech yesterday setting out what ‘securing the economy’ looked like. After striding on to stage and glancing lovingly to camera like something out of a Right Guard advert (‘What the world really needs right now is an antiperspirant that can handle all life throws at it’) he mumbled on about ‘family values’ and ‘getting tough on crime’. These are phrases straight from the pages of the 1987 Tory election leaflet stuffed between the cum-stained back issues of Razzle that David Cameron keeps in his Tyrolean shepherds hut.

Then of course, like all good acts, he played the old stuff. ‘We need stronger lockdown measures in the next 24 hours’. His sermons are like a box of chocolates, except you know EXACTLY what you’re going to get; pious preaching about lockdowns, bloody circuit breakers and extra restrictions. When asked by a canny journalist what measures he would actually put in place he had no idea. He just looked panicked and blurted out ‘close the nurseries’.

Starmer’s lockdown obsession, like cystitis, just keeps grumbling on. You take the antibiotics, drink buckets of cranberry juice and hope it fucks off but no, before you know it the burning sensation is back.

Journalists and other politicians need to start jumping on his glib little pronouncements and asking him what he would do and when he would do it, BEFORE any new Government policy announcements. The cunt would be straight into the Sunlit Uplands Retirement Home for Failed Labour Leaders before you could say ‘Clause 4’.

Nominated by: Gloria Stitz 

Seconded by: Coolforcunts

A short, after the horse has bolted, cunting for everybody’s favourite Tony Blair impersonator, Kier Starmer!

Same theatrical hand gestures, starting his replies with “look”, with a similar insincere smile when he is interviewed. If people think Boris is bad imagine Starmer in charge. Every time I hear him he’s gleefully boasting about how he would’ve done it faster, different and better, AFTER the fact of course. He is basically a broken clock that thinks because he is right twice in 24hrs he isn’t broken, he’s had a result! He is the personification of the Harry Enfield character “ooooh you don’t wanna do it like that, you wanna do it like this”, but with a posher, effeminate and more annoying voice!

Fuck off!