Keith Allen (3)

I nominate Keith Allen and the song Vindaloo, and all the cunt actors that appear in that pop video. This appeared as a recommendation on YouTube. I watched it and felt sick. That’s when the rot set in. Labour supporting Luvvie cunts trying to be popular.

Keith Allen is a Welsh cunt. If history could be rewritten everything half decent he has done should have been performed by Robert Llewellyn and this annoying cunt should have died 40 years ago.

It was made in 1998 and features many cunt actors of the day: Keith Allen, Paul Kaye (Dennis Pennis), a young Lily Allen, David Wallaims and Matt Lucas (In their Mash and Peas Sweaters).

There are 2 actors portraying Max Wall as Professor Wallofski presumably because John Cleese was too expensive to do a funny walk. Do these air head cunts even know who Max Wall was?

The only ones I could stand were Rowland Rivron as a guardsman and allegedly Malcolm Hardee is in the video but I can’t see him.

Nominated by :Anton Pillar

63 thoughts on “Keith Allen (3)

  1. Terrible song and he is responsible for spawning little Lilly, yeuch.

    I do like Dennis Pennis though. “Hey Steve (Martin). Why aren’t you funny anymore?”

    • ‘Hey Tom (Hanks), how was it playing Forest?’
      ‘Well, you know. It was a very challenging role.’
      ‘But don’t you think they’ve lost something now they’ve sold Collymore to Liverpool?’

    • Agree. Dennis Pennis was funny. Kaye also played a pretty good drug /drink addled cunt called Paul in ‘Pulling’ (2008), one of the best comedy series of the last two decades. Not a lot of people remember that.

      • Mike Strutter was fucking funny as well. My favourite Dennis Pennis line to Cher “Has anyone ever told you you’re beautiful,and meant it?”.

      • Correction: the name of the character Kaye played in ‘Pulling’ was Billy.

        Freudian slip – I must have been thinking of Paul Maskinback.

      • Good call.
        It’s fair to say that Pulling was an underrated classic.
        Donna and Karen were a bit tasty as I remember.

    • Dennis once nailed Mel Gibson a treat at a large public press conference…

      “In the movie you play a guy with long-hair / a Neanderthal Barbarian. Being an Australian, are you worried you might be typecast?”

      “I got to thank you though because I haven’t had sex in a long time……but I went to the movie and slept with the entire audience”

      To his eternal credit Gibson saw the funny side of that and laughed along. Not sure Tom Cruise would!

    • Allen’s a thoroughly annoying Cunt ……

      Fake ( diamond geezer) man of the people working classer

      Fake (champagne) socialist (moneyed) labour luvvie

      Fake comedian/ entertainer having done absolutely nothing of fucking merit in his lifetime

      But by far and away his biggest crime is creating the cretin lily the musical Mong

  2. I hate Keith Allen.
    Not because hes welsh, or even for ‘vindaloo’
    Simply because he’s a ducky darling, makeup wearing little cunt.
    His kids have inherited the same disorder, something wrong with Keith’s chromosomes,
    And his fake jack the lad bullshit have me reaching for a claw hammer, the only thing ‘laddish’ about Keith is his fuckin IQ.

    Dennis Pennis is great though!!👍

    • Allen is one of the biggest cunts of all time. I have seen him in action, MNC. He’s up there with the Gallagher cunts, Robbie Keane, and Mick Hucknall.

      • Wikipedia tells me for some reason Damien Hirst and Michael fucking Barrymore were also in Fat Les.

  3. Forgot about this bollux, didnt the tarts jugs flop out in the uncut version, or did I have a nightmare?

  4. I remember this Keith Allen cunt. This gobshite twat used to hang around New Order like a fly around shit. He frequented many Manchester pubs and clubs in those days and he was the most obnoxious pissed up arrogant prick there was. One night he was giving it his ‘Big I Am’ routine one time too many and he was mithering this fit bird and he got nasty. Her boyfriend then knocked seven colours of fuck out of Allen, much to everybody’s satisfaction. He was pretty much hated by Manchester’s club regulars and rightly so.

    He also spawned the mackerel cunted cokebag woke bullshit machine whore that is Lily Mong. So that alone is reason to despise him.

    • For sheer cuntish behaviour in and obnoxious attitude in Manchester clubs, Keith Allen rivals Liam Gallagher and Mick Fucknall. No mean feat, as they are both Death Star sized cunts.

      • Decent band in my opinion but each to their own Bob.
        Oasis were the definition of over rated.

      • Norm:

        A good mate of mine, blonde and very pretty, studies architecture in Manchester and worked in the Hacienda at the same time.
        She told me Coogan, Hucknall and Tony Wilson we’re complete Cokeheads.
        Coogan spent two years chasing her, she spent two years telling him to fuck off😂

        I never shagged her (sorry “L”), she asked me too, on quite a few occasions though.
        Ergo: Cuntfinder General 1 : Alan Partridge 0

      • Studied*

        Fuck apple
        Fuck fatigue
        Fuck being a lazy cunt and not spell checking before posting 😢

      • Never mind….. Partridge nailed Courtney Love as a consolation prize. Two junkies in an alley I’d wager?!

      • I like a bit of New Order, but Joy Division were the real deal. They were immense live. Ian Curtis on a good night was unstoppable.

        I’ve met Hucknall and Wilson. Tony was OK and a decent bloke who never forgot his roots and he never looked down on people. But Hucknall was and is a spectacular cunt. Never come across Coogan, but I’ve heard from others how up himself he’s supposed to be. Totally ignores folk who ask him for an autograph. Completely blanks them and walks on, so I have heard. A complete cunt then.

    • I always wondered why the fuck he was gurning in the background of the world in motion video. Fucking leech!

  5. I did wonder why this nomination came about. If anyone deserves to be called a has been it’s Keith Allen, failed as a B rate celebrity and failed as a father.

    Still it can’t be comfortable opening the morning paper to see your daughters minge staring back at you.

    • No Sixdog, keiths career has been revitalised due to starring in that Pembrokeshire murders thing☹️
      We’ll never be rid of him,
      Hes like a tick.

      • No, like a cold sore.
        A scabby little viral cunt that spoils your chances of a kiss and ruins photos.

      • I need to go and lay down, I’ve just agreed with something AOC said and then bloody Elon Musk and Ted Cruz also agreed, worlds gone mad!

  6. I never quite understood what this bellend was famous for to be honest. Actor? Comedian?
    Then he blatantly (along with others) jumped on the footy record bandwagon making out he was some sort of super patriot. Odd behaviour for someone who’s politics is so far to the left.
    Anyway, what finally done it for me was his hatchet job of Keith Floyd when the man was clearly ill and very fucked up that finally done it for me.
    Oh and helping to produce the mong if all mongs of course!

  7. Great nom Anton. Fucking hate this obnoxious, talentless prick with a passion and his narcissistic twat of a daughter. Boil the pair of them in piss.

  8. A twat of royal proportions.
    I must go and see if I can dig out some footage of some chap kicking his champagne socialist head in.
    Then pissing on him.
    Splendid 🎩

  9. Apparently according to a couple of celebrity sources the unfunny twat thinks it is highly entertaining to whip his cock out at show biz type gatherings.

    Funny thing allegedly), is that the midget prick has a midget prick.

  10. This Cunt not only spawned Lily Mong but that other prized prick Alfie Allen.
    He needs a good old fashioned kicking for inflicting those two fuck ups on planet earth and it’s people.

    It just goes to prove that any talentless puke can become a celeb in the UK, just by doing a shitty footy song or some other wankfest activity and Keith Allen certainly takes the prize place of talentless cretin on account of this.

    Allen shares the cunt platform alongside other luvvy cunts like Geldoff, Billy Bragg, Frank Skinner and that other oxygen thieving cunt Philip Schofield that sadly infect our arts, music & entertainment industry.

    I’m just glad some pissed off Manc pile drived his head into the dance floor several times in ‘krystals’ nightclub Stockport back in the day.

    Utter useless cuntoid.

  11. He’s Pestilence in the very funny Four Horseman scene in the Young Ones episode ‘Interesting’. Perhaps my favourite episode of one of my favourite shows. However Rik Mayall and Nigel Planer were far better as War and Famine. But then, they were/ are good actors and comedians

    • Evening Lentil.
      I liked the Young Ones.
      Especially with Motorhead as house band!
      A mate of mine was having a argument with some bloke called Neil,
      He withering said
      “Oh and Neils a hippies name”

      It greatly amused me😀

      • Evening Miserable- That made me smile
        Neil seems to be dying out as a boys name. Does anyone get christened that anymore? Similarly when was a kid half the boys in my school were called Ian and Darren. I was the only Vesper

      • There was loads of miserables at our school 😀
        Some names are dissapearing,
        Its a shame,
        Bernard, cute little baby Bernard?
        Edgar, Cuthbert, Ronald etc
        And ThunderCanary,
        Dont hear kids called that anymore..

      • My best mate in school was Thundercanary Taylor. They seem to be all called Liam and Connor now. I expect in Ireland they’ll be reciprocating. Girls names die out too, I used to sit next to a girl called Donna Kebab

      • Some names come back in vogue, Daisy, Ava, Molly etc
        But I prefer Agatha, or Doreen,
        Doreens a solid name!
        A dinnerlady name,
        A name thats dependable and gives a starving lad a extra portion!

      • Mis:

        Before I shuffle of to IsAC Heaven, I just need to fuck a lass with a name beginning with “X”, Xena or something and I will have “done” the whole alphabet 👍

        No Doreen, quite a few Diane’s, Donna’s, Denice, Danuta, Daisy, Davina, Dana, Dolores, Debbie, possibly some others, I have forgotten 😳

      • Jesus CG!
        Its almost impossible to find a X
        Name, like you say Xena,
        Maybe Malcolm X?
        Ever heard of the plastercasters?
        They were a bunch of groupies who shagged all the famous rock stars of the 60s, youd love em!
        Anyway, I knew a girl who was a groupie, she was with a band called Dogs d amour (shite)
        Blonde, massive tits, liked to party, and I took her off the lead singer😁
        Saw her about a year ago,
        Looked old.☹️

      • Kudos👍

        I remember them-the best thing about them was the cartoon album covers adverts in Viz magazine and others.

      • Ruff-wasn’t that one of Lenny “I-kaaaaaaaaaay” Henry’s milk-butty chomping Rastafarian cunts middle names?

        Just asking😉

      • I couldn’t actually say, General.

        We knew a large grey cat in the ’70s called Algernon. At least that’s what we called it. Turned out later it was a female. Must be the first transgender cat I ever came across. Not in that way, you filthy minded prevert!

      • There was one bird I met a few years back. Her name was Xenia and she was s total fucking psycho. So I declined. She was a bit Nazi looking and all. Dodged a bullet there, I think.

  12. Norm:

    In your opinion, where the Best & worst football records?

    Del Amitri-“Don’t come home toooooo sooooooon” 😂

    That shite John Barnes “rap” in World in Motion?

    England team’s “weeeeellll fly the flag agaaaaain”?

    • Best:

      Martin Buchan – Old Trafford Blues
      Don Fardon – George Best Belfast Boy
      England 1970 – Back Home


      Manchester City – The Boys In Blue
      Blue Moon (any version)

      Manchester United –
      1. United, Manchester United
      2. Look Around
      3. Yellow Submarine
      4. Oh! What A Lovely Morning
      5. Storm In A Teacup
      6. Precious Memories
      7. Congratulations
      8. Never Be Alone
      9. Chirpy Chirpy Cheep Cheep
      10. Love Again Live Again
      11. Saturday Afternoon
      12. Raindrops Keep Falling On My Head

      The whole team – Best, Law and Charlton included – recorded a whole album of 70s hits in 1972. It has to be heard to be believed, CG.

  13. Have I turned into Matt Damon in “The Martian”, or us it fu king Q-u-I-e-t in here😢

    • Sssshhh.
      Theyre all asleep, teeth in a glass on the bedside, medication taken,
      One or two will be up to piss a few times but to all intent theyre in the land of nod.
      Dreaming racist white dreams and occasionally talking in their sleep.
      “Mmm a cunt…zzzz

      • Mis-my tv in the bedroom (6 months old-fuck you curry’s) died, I don’t watch mainstream, nor on social media:

        They could have dropped the fucking bomb and I would be the last to know😗

        Thought maybe forum problems if the WEF putting plan “world domination” into practice👎

  14. I fucking hate Keith Allen with an unnatural passion. His daughter is a massive woke cunt too. But I tell you what, I saw her in the flesh a couple of years ago in Tavistock and she looked fuckable I’ll give her that. To be fair, based only on looks, she’d get a right violent dry anal hate fuck from me and no mistake. Fucking cunt!

  15. I never quite understood what this bellend was famous for to be honest. Actor? Comedian?
    Alleged actor. He was in The Comic Strip Presents: The Bullshitters. An awful waste of a parody of The Professionals.

    He also made an arse of himself whilst drunk during The Late Show. Insulting an Indian gentleman by saying he didn’t have a chip on his shoulder, he had a vindaloo. Hence is association with Vindaloo for the song. The irony is that it’s an old joke and Vindaloo is a Portuguese dish. I don’t think a drunk Mr Allen in 1989 knew that.

    The man is a buffoon.

  16. This arse clown is a cunt for spawning the Musical mong Lilly the spunk trumpet, I’m sure he, s a cunt in his own right as well, but honestly Kieth it would have been better to pull out and shoot your load on the pub toilet floor you wanker…..

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