I would like to nominate Big Dick Energy and its proponents for a full on cunting.. I’d never heard of this until the other day. Apparently it was started by the cunt known as Ariana Grande in a tweet about her boyfriend. It is described as “confidence without cockiness. It is never misplaced and cannot be simulated. It is the sexual equivalent of writing a cheque for ten grand knowing you’ve got it in the bank account.” If this weren’t baffling and bullshitty enough it reaches higher peaks of hilarity by stating that men with BDE include uber cunts such as Idris Elba, Chris Evans ( stop laughing at the back ), and Harry Styles amongst others. If you’re still following this lunacy it gets even better, it would seem that you don’t need a big dick to have BDE, in fact you don’t need a dick at all ! Ah ha !! Now we get to the nub of it, Wiminz are as likely, nay entitled to be brimming with BDE, famous cunts with cunts who fall into this catagory include Rihanna, Serena Williams and Cate Blanchett, who are all spurting great jets of the stuff 24hrs a day. Have you ever heard such bollocks ? This is nothing more than 21st. century, entitled, Wiminz penis envy, inclusivity horseshit.

Please let there be another war soon. Only mass bloodletting can stop this spiral into madness.

Nominated by Jack The Cunter

Big Lottery winners are complete and utter cunts-especially the ones who go public with the wonga.It aint enough that they’ve pulled off the impossible-sometimes beating odds of 100,000,000 to 1.Youve got more chance of growing a 20 inch dick,winning the Olympic 100m and landing on the moon,all within 6 months.No they have to rub it in the cunts,opening champagne bottles all over the gaff,brandishing huge cheques with “Please pay A.Cunt £99,999,999” .and gurning for the cameras with inane grins plastered across their cuntish faces.Yes,it could be you-especially if you are a complete and utter cunt.

Nominated by CuntsR-Us

I would like to nominate Harvester “Restaurants” for a cunting.

Not only are these places the monosodium glutimate of the cuisine world, and let’s not forget their tasteless and shameless usage of the Isley Brothers’ “Harvest for the World” song to promote their vomit inducing wares (a song about famine nonetheless), no, I would like to nominate Harvester because of their latest “Don’t risk it all for a sneaky Harvester” advert.

Bunch of snowflakes twisting about the bank of Mam & Dad daring to grab a shite 2-for-1 shambles with a couple of finest Chandonrays without being plagued and pillaged by their ungrateful offspring.

Now, as real as the ingrate sentiment may be, most kids – flakes or not – would rather chew their own arms off than a) visit a Harvester and b) go there with their parents.

Utter fucking shite on so many counts that even Audley Harrison hasn’t heard them all!

Nominated by Rebel without a Cunt!

Harvester restaurants are more than just a shite chain of ‘family pubs’. They serve as a stark, bleak reminder of just how catastophic your life choices have been up to this point if you end up eating at these hellholes on the regular.

Always to be found in remote corners of loosely middle-class faceless commuter hellholes like Northolt, Ruislip, Reading etc, everything about these places is fucking vile. In the same way that spaceship from Event Horizon inadvertently travelled to hell and was infested from stem to stern with evil, similarly are Harvesters steeped in the detritis of the scum class.

From the beer-varnished joists to the piss-soaked carpets, these outlets make Wetherspoons look like exclusive franchises. Admittedly inventive in how many different fucking ways they can serve chicken and sweetcorn, the infinite salad bars are a hideously ironic foil for the infinite salad dodging cunts who swill the piss-warm Worthington’s creamflow by the flagon.

The few times I’ve eaten there, all I can remember is feeling like I’m eating at some grey, concrete surrounded grief-hole much akin to an Alan Patridge travel-tavern. It would be a more joyous experience to put a table and fucking chair on the hard shoulder of a motorway near Saffron Walden and eat some waterlogged Buxted and chips as the long hauls whizz past.

And they have put out some real humdingers for shit adverts – check out this fucking abomination!

Take it from someone who has been to these dives – ‘liberate te ex inferis’.

Nominated by The Empire Cunts Back

i would like to cunt Rodrigo Alves. who he ? i hear you ask. well he is the human barbie ‘Ken ‘ . fuck my old boots what a fuckin specimen. what the fuck is that all about? i’d never heard of him until i saw a trailer for Celebrity Big Brother, obviously i don’t watch the shit. google him . what a sad sad individual.

Nominated by richard1

(Excuse the grammar and typing but we couldn’t be arsed to correct it – Admin)