Free range eggs unavailable from Monday!

Oh the shock. Oh the horror. What are Joycelyn and Jocasta supposed to have for breakfast?

https://amp.theguardian.com/world/2022/mar/18/free-range-eggs-unavailable-britain-avian-flu

From what I can gather, there’s been an isolated case of evian flu ( correct me if I’m wrong) (OK then, it’s “avian” – NA) and all farmers, egg producers, have had to isolate their free range birds. So from tomorrow, they can no longer sell them as free range.

Over reacting much, munch?

Nominated by: Jeezum Priest

I’m rapidly running out of places to eat because I cross off places that sing happy birthday or some other shit to cunts who are celebrating.

We ate at a Turkish place last night and the fucking loudspeaker blurted out 4 times for some cunts birthday.

Sometimes a little cake with a candle on is presented and this is duly followed by clapping and cheering.

The recipients nearly always look embarrassed by it so why bother. Just let them eat their meal and fuck off.

If I’m not mistaken singing happy birthday is illegal anyway or used to be as it’s still under copyright.

Happy Birthday Copyright Link
(Fabulous link provided by – Part Time Admin – PTA)

I reckon that Marie Antoinette started it all. Fucking frog.
Sorry no link, it just pisses me off.

Nominated by: infidelgastro

Seconded by: Geordie Twatt

I’ll second this. Noisy bastards celebrating something not worth celebrating are complete cunts.

In particular I’d single out an authentic Burns Supper complete with piper for particular opprobrium. What the fuck is there to celebrate about a tax inspector who penned a bit of doggerel anyway?

Then there’s all that fuss about a bag of minced sheep’s offal, and some cunt in a skirt does his best to burst everyone’s eardrums. I know some people who subject themselves to this torture every year who even have no family connection whatsoever to Scotland, stupid sods.

Point of order, however. Marie Antoinette was Austrian, not French.

Lordy where to start on this latest round of Eco lunacy.

https://tyreextinguishers.com/
(Link provided by legal eagle Night Admin – NA)

Well I guess the claims on their ‘leaderless’ website is a good start.

‘SUV’s are a climate disaster’. If SUV’s were a country they’d be the 7th largest polluting country in the world’.

It’s hard not to really laugh at that. Fuck knows how they came to that conclusion but I’m left thinking wouldn’t it be better to take the fight to real countries like China, India, Brazil et al rather than pretending SUV’ are a country. FFS.

‘Air pollution is racist’. Jeez it takes a massive leap of faith to even believe this is worth any scrutiny but let’s have a go.

Apparently it’s only ‘people of colour’ that live in the most deprived areas that have the most toxic air and SUV drivers tend to be richer and therefore tend to be white.

That’s a quote lifted verbatim from their website.

No stats, no referencing just at best a totally bigoted assumption.

Try driving around Birmingham’s deprived areas where the people of colour all seem to have a 15 year old Range Rover, X5 or Q7 on their makeshift drives.

But being from the real world one thing I’ve noticed over the last 20 years or so is that the most deprived areas tend to be a proper mix of white Eastern European’s and sub Saharan boat people

Interesting that these bastards are blind sided by colour……

‘SUV’s are dangerous’. Apparently SUV’s are more likely to kill when striking a pedestrian that normal cars.

So a cursory look at the .GOV website confirms fuck all data is collected on the types of vehicles involved in accidents, so I won’t labour this point other than to say has a child who would scream and scream till they were sick written the press release.

Lastly ‘SUV’s are unnecessary’.

Well that’s a point that could be worth debate but I’d rather scratch my piles until they bled profusely.

I don’t own an SUV but fuck me I’m tempted now just at the thought of catching a wizened long grey haired sandal wearing yoghurt knitting eco lune trying to deflate my tyres at 3am.

Nominated by: CuntyMcCuntface

Night Admin responds…

Tampering with someone’s vehicle is obviously illegal. Sounds like criminal damage to me. Inciting others to participate in such criminal activity is also illegal. So who are these cunts?

Here’s a link to the whois lookup for their domain:

https://www.whois.com/whois/tyreextinguishers.com

They are using an intermediary security company to disguise their identity. However, the link contains email addresses where abuse complaints can be sent.

In addition, their website IP address is 82.221.129.68 which is owned by an Icelandic ISP. They too have an email address where abuse complaints can be sent. Here’s the link:

https://whois.urih.com/record/82.221.129.68/

Wales Online News Link.

Romany Gypsies playing the fucking victims is a cunt, see above.

You live somewhere nice, rural, quiet and before you know it there’s horses appeared in a field, or a caravan/ caravans, then the land is sold and then your nightmare starts, your local pub becomes a no go zone, and then all sorts of problems start and on it goes.

Then you have an innocent guy, who would never hurt a fly, has never ripped anyone off in his life and I’m sure there’s loads of other things he’s never done, was somewhere else at the time with witnesses and so on and so on, goes on the news bleating about how hard life is, how they cant understand why people don’t welcome them with open arms, how its everyone else’s fault, how they get a raw deal, how/why they will never get planning permission, and the best bit is how they are victims and they are so misunderstood, plod usually don’t want to know.

The place always ending up looking like a scene from snatch and you cant sell your house and move…..

Nomimated by Fuglyucker

Do women have a cervix? Do women have a backbone would be a better question nowadays.

Women used to have backbones (my mother had one) but not anymore.

It was ‘International Woman’s Day’ yesterday. I am sure you celebrated with with your wives and sisters and mothers cunters.

What a great day to truly reflect in what it is to be a woman.

Poor Annaliese Dodds couldnt get to that. Because she couldnt even define what a woman is. She was asked to define a woman-

Miss Dodds replied: “I have to say there are different definitions legally around what a woman actually is. You look at the definition within the Equality Act and I think it just says someone who is adult and female but then it doesn’t say how you would define either of those things. You have got the biological definition, legal definition”

Miss Barnett said: “With respect, I didn’t ask for that. What’s the Labour definition?”

Miss Dodds replied: “With respect Emma, I think it does depend what the context is, surely? I mean surely that is important here.’

JK Rowling rather brilliantly defined the situation as ‘they that cannot be named’.

Dodds Interview Link
(Helpful link provided by – Part Time Admin – PTA)

Modern women don’t have any balls.

Oh for the days of Germane and burning your bra. There was something real at least about them.

Nominated by: Miles Plastic