Dead Pool [126]


Congratulations to ChasCMusic who successfully predicted that the sun ain’t gonna shine anymore for Walker brother, Scott. So the slate is wiped clean and we move on to Deadpool 126:

The rules

1) Pick five cunts you think are on the way out.No duplicates allowed.Anyone who nominates the worlds oldest man or woman is a cunt and will be ignored.

2) It is first come first serve.Only comments on this thread will be valid.You can always be a cunt and steal someone elses nominations (Like Black and White frequently does.

3) It must be some newsworthy cunt we have actually heard of.

The usual our blog our rules policy applies as always

David Miliband (6)

A special charity cunting please for this pompous heap of steaming shit, who has spent the last three years doing very nicely thank you out of “International Refuge”, but today March 23rd has turned up in London to “march” with “the people” for their fucking “people’s referendum”.

I am sick to death of opportunistic so-called “Labour” politicians, who pretend to be one of us, but are just as up their own arse conservatives as the Conservatives they pretend to loathe. People like Anthony Wedgewood-Benn, who became Tony Benn and liked to be photographed drinking tea out of a cracked mug, to show his working class credentials, who was so socialist he called the useless twat of a chinless wonder son of his, Hilary – surely the ost working class name in the Gorbals.

But David Miliband is an especially oily cunt. He fucked off from Britain in a fit of pique because he was beaten to the leadership of his party by his equally useless brother, but made sure he was well rewarded with his highly paid charity work, now he seems to be easing his arse back into this country, no doubt to wait in line for when Tom Watson knifes Steptoe in the back, then he will stab Watson in the back, so he can take up his *rightful* position as Labour leader. What a degrading thought – the two masters of self-entitlement – duckie David and Chuckaduckie stripped down to their spangly briefs to decide who has the right to *lead* the unleadable. With Labour back in Blairite territory, you can be sure “The Independent Group” will become a thing of the past.

This oily fuckwit should fuck off back to the States where his type of carpetbagger are a dime a dozen.

Nominated by W. C. Boggs

URI Geller (2)

This cunt is using the bullshit of telepathy to stop Brexit. Let me guess Brexit is reversed and this twat will take more credit for stopping Brexit than Hasslehof took for bringing down the fucking Berlin Wall. Alternatively We skip out with no deal and no doubt it will be anyone’s fault but Uri’s. This man was and still is an Uber cunt in everyway.

Some old magician bloke has outed him on every shyster scheme he has ever come up with yet still he is stealing oxygen and making no doubt a tidy living. URI when you fail to stop Brexit please remain in whatever country you are in and never darken our shores again.

Nominated by Cuntsince1066

Uri Geller is… a cunt, we all know it. Anyone who works as a medium/psychic and claims to bend spoons for a living, is the living breathing Oxford dictionary definition of a cunt. Apart from existing as a parasitic cunt, what has he done recently? Well, the smart cunt thinks he can stop brexit with the power of his mind. Yip

So here are some personal favourites from an actual letter he wrote to Theresa May. Hmmm, I thought he could telepathically send her the message:
“I feel psychically and very strongly that most British people do not want Brexit. I love you very much but I will not allow you to lead Britain into Brexit. As much as I admire you, I will stop you telepathically from doing this and believe me I am capable of executing it. Before I take this drastic course of action, I appeal to you to stop the process immediately while you still have a chance.”

This oxygen stealer actually used to live in May’s constituency. He said he had known the prime minister for 21 years and that she had visited his home.
“Three years before you became prime minister, I predicted your victory when I showed you Winston Churchill’s spoon on my Cadillac, which I asked you to touch.” Prophetic!!!
This will make him really popular with the isac crowd, he also claimed he is using the power of his mighty mind to ensure that “Jeremy Corbyn never gets the keys to Number 10 Downing Street”. “I will ensure that they bend out of all proportion to ensure that he never takes up residence there,”

There you have it fellow cunters. Uri has got this and he loves us. I’d send him to the fucking peacefuls, so he can bask in the best of human nature. I doubt they’d be using spoons on him!

Shove your whole cutlery set up your arse you waste of space!!!

Nominated by Cuntflappage

Snowflakes (7)

Snowflakes

As you all know I have endured a personal meltdown,got suspended from work, could have got struck off, all due to the rantings of snowflakes.

A gaggle of Guardian reading graduates of lesbian dance theory and non binary African drum making made some horrendous allegations against me that were, thankfully, not believed.

One of these idiots has only been working in the field for 12 weeks. He is not clinically qualified but felt he knew better than someone who qualified before he was born. He said he was concerned about what he felt others might feel: Get to fuck you sprawny little cunt.

Thankfully,common sense prevailed. However, what the fuck has the world come to? Fucking left wing cunts with opinions on everything and no knowledge on anything now get to set the agenda!

If I was a Guardian reading um bongo drinking lesbo in a wheelchair who was a parking Stanley…..

CUNTS. This site MUST continue to challenge what is becoming incredibly dangerous: policing ,not just speech, but thought. It HAS to stop.

My family,friends and this site got me through it.

God Save the Queen!

Nominated by kravdarth

 

 

“Security” Guards

Not-fit-for purpose “Security” Guards are Cunts.

I recently took one of the lads down to the Magistrate’s Court to get banned for Drink-Driving. In the entrance was a doorframe metal detector thing that you had to walk through after emptying your pockets of keys,coins etc. This was manned by what I took to be Methuselah’s Grandfather. After getting through Daddy Whizz’s checkpoint, we were then confronted by a big fat Cunt who asked me to spread my arms while he patted me down….the ridiculous Cunt even had the temerity to ask me to remove my hat! Fucks Sake,could he not see that he was dealing with a Gentleman? After all,how many of his “punters” would be wearing a black cape and top-hat on an unseasonably warm February morning unless they had breeding?
When we got into the waiting room it was stuffed full of the Great and Good of Northumbrian society. After saying our “hellos” to a few acquaintances we settled down to await the young ‘un’s case being called. Looking around, there were about 12 or so people waiting,plus their friends. Indeed,there was quite a spirit of camaraderie,but it just struck me that if things had kicked off, there was no way that the fat blob and his antiquated side-kick would have been able to do anything about it.

If you’re going to have security guards,they should at least be capable of walking six paces without an oxygen-mask. I’ve noticed that Tesco seem to have the same type of guard…spotty,unfit youths or relics from the Boer War. If one of them attempted to waylay me, I’d just tell them to “Fuck Off” and keep walking safe in the knowledge that they’d probably have a heart-attack if they tried to keep up with my brisk pace.

Fuck Off.

Nominated by Dick Fiddler