Justice Secretary David Gauke says he will resign if the next prime minister chooses to pursue a no-deal Brexit.

Tory leadership favourite Boris Johnson has pledged the UK will leave the EU on 31 October – with or without a deal.

However, Mr Gauke told the BBC’s Andrew Marr Show that a “sizeable” number of Conservative MPs believed the UK should leave with a deal.

His comments come as Tory MP Sam Gyimah said more than 30 Tory MPs could vote against a no-deal Brexit.

The EU has set the UK a deadline of 31 October to leave the bloc.

Many people are of the opinion Mr Gauke that of fucking course we should leave the European Union with a deal if possible however it is clear that after over 3 years of “negotiation” the deal offered by the cunts in Brussels is absolute fucking dog shite and we should leave without one.

You useless cunt.

Nominated by Willie Stroker

What about this pair of whinging cunts:

‘An engaged couple say their wedding plans have been scuppered by changes to next year’s early May bank holiday.
May Day is traditionally held on a Monday, but will be put back to Friday, 8 May in 2020 to accommodate the 75th anniversary of VE Day.’

Everything ruined 11 months in advance? For fucks sake get over yourselves. I know it is inconsiderate of the 75th anniversary of VE day to be May 8th but get a fucking life.
This shite made the BBC website. Surely there was a Brexit horror story to promote?

Nominated by Cuntstable Cuntbubble

British fuckwits dressing up in stars and stripes to celebrate getting an ass kicking at the hands of the Mary queens.
Now I know that we are all friends now but fuck me.
Who in their right minds would want to join in, celebrating another country’s national day? Especially given that the day in question celebrates a war in which we came second.
24,000 of our soldiers lost their lives in the many bloody battles that took place in order to oust us from the colonies we had set up for them. (Ungrateful bastards).
Yes I know we were taxing them to the hilt, but that was to pay for a previous war that we helped them to win. (Ungrateful bastards).
Sorry, I’m getting sidetracked. It’s just as well I don’t have time to mention the dirty French bastards who joined in late on to kick us while we already on the floor.
Getting back to the dickwads who celebrate with them.
Understand what you are rejoicing in before you go out to eat your 3lb hot dog you fat simple bastards.
I’m sorry to say that London comes out top again in offending the minority British, with a special shout out to Covent Garden.
I know that it was 250 years ago but even so. Will we be having a party to celebrate the Nazi invasion of Jersey in 150 years time?
Probably, it’s about the only flag that we haven’t took one up the arse for yet.
It’s a shame that we don’t put as much effort into celebrating our own fucking national day!

Nominated by The Cunt of Monte Cristo

And the barbecue cunts are out again…

You know the ones… Total knobcunts who get out the barbecue as soon as it hits 20 odd degrees… They have a load of cunts round ‘to mine’… The daft tarts screech and talk blabbering crap, they play shite music, there’s idiot offspring and screaming toddlers, and the ‘new man’ cuntmong who suddenly ‘takes over’ when it’s ‘barbi time’… Said cunt talks very loudly in a ‘Look at me! I’m in charge!’ way with all that ‘Order up!’ and ‘It’s ready, guys!’ millenial speak shite… Fucking damn cunts….

Nominated by Norman

What the fuck is it with barbies?

Went into the garden yesterday to get a bit of peace and quiet and what do I get…fucking arseholes across the drive firing up the barbie, putting up smoke signals that send the local Yanks panicking tbat the indians are coming, and the overwhelming stench of lighter fuel.

Then to top it off they put up a kiddies paddling pool in the front garden. So we get all the screaming brats while the parents piss it up around the back. And what a peadophile’s photo op to boot. In my day it was called lowering the tone. Common as fucking muck. Irresponsible parenting. Simply not done.

You want a barbie? Then fuck off to Australia and leave us all in peace.

Neighbours with barbies? Fuck ’em…

Nominated by Dioclese

It’s a little abstract but I’d like to cunt what Sir Roger Scruton has called our ‘Culture of Repudiation’.

What he means is that so many of the young dismiss European culture, and seek enlightenment on backpacking tours to Cambodia and Kathmandu. They imagine they will achieve some sort of spiritual awakening and chat with a Swami, sharing pseudo profundities on their facebook page.
What actually happens is that they get dropped of at the airport by mummy, fly to their exotic destination, get to the hotel, head to a bar full of Brits, Yanks and Aussies, get pissed up, go to the Full Moon beach party, drink buckets of cocktails, go back to the hotel and return to the UK bigger dickheads than when they left. These cunts will then pretend they are well-travelled, open-minded and cultured, when they know next to nothing about anything, and have not bothered to explore their own rich heritage. The example Scruton gave was their lack of interest in visiting the great cathedrals, museums, palaces of the continent, as young men did on their ‘grand tours’.

They have travelled everywhere, but don’t know where anything really is, or understand it in a broader historical context, and refuse to acknowledge the important place that the European cultural canon has, seeking sustenance in oriental customs, religions and cuisines that they never immerse themselves in or really learn anything from, because they’re utterly vacuous, airheaded piss-artists on an extended jolly-up and full of misplaced guilt over colonialism.

Nominated by Cuntamus Prime