Dead Pool [9]

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* * * * WE HAVE A WINNER! * * * *
Congratulations to Dan who correctly guessed the next cunt to kick the cunting bucket … therefore becoming a dead cunt … would be Jimmy Ellis aka Z Cars’ very own Bert Lynch.

Here’s a picture of the dead cunt back in the good old days of black and white telly, when the quality of the programming actually mattered. Mind you, Z Cars was an exception…

So the slate has been wiped clean and everyone gets to pick a new ‘dead cunt walking’ as we move on to The Dead Pool 9. Here’s the rules :

1. Nominate who you think is next on the way out.
You can have a maximum of three cunts each. Leave names in the Comments.

2. You win if your Cunt dies first.
Then the slate is wiped clean and we start again. Of course, you can always be a cunt and steal someone else’s dead cunt candidate from the last Dead Pool.

Any cunt who tries to cheat by nominating the World’s Oldest Man or Woman is a cunt and will be ignored. The winner gets a dedicated Dead Pool Champion guest post on the subject of his/her choice and kudos of cuntishness aplenty. Oh, and the usual “Our Blog Our Rules” thing applies.

And no – Before you ask, you can’t have Schumacher! Don’t be a cunt.

Scotland the Brave [3]

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When you lot piss off you can take the Jock mafia in the BBC, Labour and Tory party with you. I’d happily take back the several hundred thousand English who live in Scotland if it means the whining, saltire waving Braveheart watching sheeps guts munching lowland doggerel reading Jock cunts fuck off back to that shithole you call Scoortland.

The noo!

Nominated by: Colin Murray’s Brain

Chris Moyles [3]

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Chris Moyles is [alledgedly] an thieving lying criminal cunt who has been paid £millions by the evil beast PC shit at the BBC.

Moyles [alledgedly] enrolled in a tax scam (Working Wheels) that [alledgedly] criminally fabricated fees and losses to avoid paying tax. [If this is true] then the dirty evil filth pig cunt, Chris Moyles, knows full well that he was committing a criminal offence and thieving from the poor with tax evasion.

Meanwhile, cripples who do not turn up for appointments at the DWP (because they cannot afford taxis) are sanctioned 3 months benefit (£71.70 a week).

IMHO we should all pray for Chris Moyles to die of cancer.

Nominated by: BBC Syph

(With added caveats because we don’t like being sued! Ed.)

Football ranking

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The FIFA/Coca-Cola World Ranking Table. WTF? Spain is number one and Germany, two – fair enough, but Argentina three and Portugal four?

Wait a minute, England is 15 and USA is 13?

Ha! I take it all back!

FIFA is god! Omnipotent and omniscient!

Nominated by: Cuddling Aquarians

Internet pedantry

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Internet pedants are a breed who pounce on the slightest typographical error, any slip in grammar and a misplaced comma.

These pedantic cunts are so obsessed with berating others over the minutiae of the language, that they fail to see that their own comments and arguments are merely worthless intellectual masturbation with no valid content.

Nominated by: Toadspanker