Elton John (7)


Elton is due a cunting. Apparently, the bewigged little egomaniac has given a interview in which he expressed his anti-Brexit views. All the typical, cliched bullshit was there, we were lied to, people didn’t know what we voted for, etcetera etcetera, blah, blah, blah. I know that ‘celebrities’ like to think that more intelligent than the rest of us, and that their opinion is worth more than ours, but they’re wrong.

To suggest that we didn’t know what we were voting is, frankly, an insult. I knew EXACTLY what I was voting for. I was voting to leave an organisation that not one single British man or woman EVER voted to join, is undemocratic and corrupt and led by unelected, unaccountable, incompetent, arrogant pricks, who have shown the UK nothing but contempt since the day the EU came into being.

Reg has always been a bad tempered, arrogant little shit, but I think his head has finally grown too big for his hair piece. He’s entitled to his opinion, but he is not entitled to insult 17.4 million democracy lovers, by insinuating that we are too stupid to understand a question such as; “Do you want the UK to remain in the EU, or do you want the UK to leave the EU”? What’s so difficult to understand about a question like that? Stick to singing Reg, it’s what you’re mediocre at.

Nominated by Quick Draw McGraw

Elton John is in need of a serious cunting after his latest hysterical breakdown on the subject of Brexit.
“People weren’t told the TRUTH!” he lisped between sobs, his faithful wife holding his hand as he bravely soldiered on through his distress. Well Reg, if the truth is so important I expect you’ll be repaying the libel damages you received from the tabloid which wrongly accused you of being gay, and issue a public apology to your first wife for involving her in your pretend to be straight lies. Then you can stop wearing those ridiculous rugs, you’re only lying to yourself. I have a lovely full head of hair (The only thing of value I inherited from my father) but when baldness eventually claims me I will take it like a man.
Almost forgot, you can also stop any legal injunctions you have in place to prevent reporting on you and your family’s disgusting conduct. I wouldn’t let my dog stay a night at your place, never mind young children.
Sir Elton, who was knighted for services to the anal prolapse repair industry,

YOU ARE A CUNT!

Nominated by Themagiccunt

Discriminatory casting


I feel another cunting is due for the pc brigade who plan tv shows. Having read this afternoon that there is to be a reboot of Buffy the vampire slayer, with a black woman playing the lead role. When does this madness end? Much like the question posed another post, can we expect remakes of films with black leads to be made with white actors or a Bridget Jones ( the only female film that came mind) remake titled Brad Jones with Colin Firth as the lead.

Blackwashing is afoot my fellow cunters. How far will it go?

Nominated by McCunterson

Pre school graduation balls


What the fuck possesses some people to Dress up their four year old sprogs in a fucking waistcoat or tux or ballroom dress just because they are leaving their pre school or nursery and going to the big wide and dangerous world of reception class in September. This is cuntishness of the highest order. You can bet Cuntbook will be alive with pictures posted of some smug little four year old prince with parted hair holding hands with some princess in a fucking meringue with some sappy caption underneath.

To coin a phrase from a well known poster on this site, my piss is boiling at the sheer fucking, look at me, ineptitude of these cuntish parents. And while I’m at it please add an extra cunting to the the grandparents who buy them a fucking graduation gift. They should know fucking better.

Nominated by Cuntsince1066

Owen Jones (9)

Owen Fucking Jones. Has there ever been a more unlikable little shithead? Fresh from crying over Trump’s visit the cunt and his army of snowflakes are trying to get Nigel Farage sacked from LBC by starting a twatter campaign targeting companies who advertise with LBC.

Apparently Farage is “far right” aka he doesn’t agree with the fairy. This is after Jones recently interviewed a woman on his Youtube channel who identifies as a communist, Ash Sarkar (Someone cunt her for good measure). You couldn’t make it up. Hopefully the companies tell him and fellow travellers to fuck off.

Cunt

Nominated by An Irish Cunt

Indonesian Farmers

Indonesian Farmers are cunts, aren’t they?

Imagine an Indonesian farm that operated on a licence to breed protected saltwater and New Guinea crocodiles both for preservation and to harvest some of the animals. Sounds a bit odd, doesn’t it. Yet it provides economy for the area.

Now imagine that you’re not very bright and wander into the enclosure to pick some grass for feeding. Can you imagine what might be the consequence? Yes, that’s right. The crocodiles had a little snack.
I wonder what lesson could’ve been learnt here.

The End.

Oh, I forgot the last bit. After the local idiot was buried, a mob of angry farmers descended on the enclosure and, as revenge, slaughtered 292 crocs in vengeance of the deceased. They were furious that their trespassing friend was killed so they destroyed all the rare breed species providing a living to locals as well as promoting conservation issues!

I understand this is Indonesia, a country that still believes in weird nonsense and flying horses (probably) but what were they thinking? Were the crocodiles aware of their “crime”? Has vengeance been served? Is this the 9th century?

Wing-nut, thick-as-shit murdering peasants.
And cunts.

Nominated by Captain Magnanimous