Dead Pool [224]


Congratulations to yours truly (Shaun) who correctly predicted that Former Northern Ireland and Housing secretary James Brokenshire would be the next dead dude.The Tory MP was just 53 and died yesterday from lung cancer despite never having smoked.

On to Dead Pool 224

The rules

1)Pick 5 famous cunts you think will be next to conk out.No duplicates.Its first come first serve so you can always be a cunt and steal someone else’s picks (Like Black and White cunt frequently does)

2)Anyone who picks the World’s oldest man or woman is a cunt who we will ignore.

3) It must be a famous cunt we have heard of.

4)You cannot change picks mid pool unless someone has already nabbed your pick.

5)Please check your picks haven’t already been taken as we can’t be arsed to check.

Cunts wearing Hoodies


Cunts in hoodies, why is it whoever puts on a hoodie instantly looks like thieving cunt, no mater who they are they look like utter cunts and usually the are.

Today had one walk across the road in front of me, didnt see the car hoodie on, didnt hear the car, headphones in and the prick was glues to his phone.

Day before some cunt hoodie on, riding towards us on an electric scooter, im thinking this is on dash cam, so fuck him.

Then whenever your behind a car and all you can smell is weed, usually being driven by some wanker and you guessed correctly with a hoodie on.

Then you have the spotty yoof with hoodie, staffy with a studded collar on, usually called Tyson or something equally cuntish.

Then the ultimate, usually one of out Asian cousins, hoodie on, in the little Audi thats really a golf, blacked out glass, fucking lowered to much, wheels at an angle so the car handles like a tesco trolley on ice, exhuast wider than the chunnel music blaring, smell of pot, or e cig billowing out the window like fucking Piper Alfa, body kit stuck on with no more nails and has to virtually stop to straddle every speed bump,driving the peice of shit virtually lying down so he has to look thrigh the side window from under his arm, you know the cool as fuck Stephen Hawking position and meaning your stuck behind this fuck monkey until he gets pulled by the police.

Bet the first thing that comes out of the cunts mouth is , why are you picking on me, why are you not out catching real criminals, this is the 30th time in 2 weeks, you raaaacist you are…no thats not crack in little bags in the glove box, yes my name really is Walt Disney, just look at my driving licence, sorry ran out of cyan while i was printing it…..

Nominated by: Fuglyucker

HMP Isle of Wight goes Gender Pronoun

HMP Isle of Wight, formerly known as Parkhurst.

The dumb cunts who run this place are distributing pronoun badges to inmates as part of a ‘gender identity inclusion drive’.

This is in preparation for ‘National Inclusion Week’ (which is happening now, 27 Sep – 3 Oct, in case you were bothered).

There are six purple badges with pronouns including ‘he/they’, ‘her/they’, ‘she/her’ and ‘they/them’.

The badges also include a mix of non-binary options and one that reads: ‘Ask me!’

I’m sure a prisoner will want to know someone’s preferred pronoun before jamming a shiv in his eardrum.

News Link

Nominated by: mystic maven

The Magic Money Tree Laid Bare

Due to the Pandemic various schemes were introduced, costing billions, to preserve jobs, business and standards of living. These were introduced by the wicked Tories. One benefit increase seemingly at the behest of a millionaire, tax avoiding footballer.
These were all temporary.
But those same wicked Tories are now snatching away these schemes to starve and bankrupt people.
Furlough has finished. It cost £70 billion but seems to have helped some businesses increase profits, dividends and director’s pay.

There was also an extra £20 per week for claimants. Scratch card, tabs and booze sales have benefitted and a certain footballer has benefitted immensely through his ‘Image Rights’ tax avoidance scheme. But the fuckers are snatching this away too.

VAT was reduced to 5% for hospitality but the wicked bastards are imposing a 12.5% rate, increasing to 20% in April. The cunts.

Covid has only cost £317 billion for 2021. Double that when 2020 is included.
When will the magic money tree run dry? When will the handouts stop and who the fuck is going to pay?——

—–The magic money tree. I think it grows on Jezza’s allotment. Or perhaps in one of St Marcus’s Cheshire mansions, where it wont have to pay much tax.

Nominated by: Cuntstable Cuntbubble

The Larkins Goes Tik Tok

(Tok Stephen, above, to play Charley)

A ‘Mixed Race, Of Course’ cunting for ITV, please.

Just caught a trailor for ‘The Larkins’, based on H.E Bates’ books.

Now, I loved ‘The Darling Buds Of May’, a great, gentle, heart-warming series, and now it appears that ITV have commissioned a series about the Larkins earlier life. Great!

Except that Mariette’s love interest, Charley, played wonderfully by Philip Franks in the ‘Darling Buds Of May’, is of course a schwartzer. Naturally. Of course. As there were so fucking many mixed-race relationships in the forties/fifties.

Stop insulting the viewer with your fucking agenda you utter, utter, total motherfucking cunts. May whomever decided this bit of casting, die the death of a thousand late finishes.

The cunt.

News Link

Nominated by: DCI Gene Cunt