Danger tourists are arrogant cunts. We are supposed to feel sorry for two middle class western wankers who embark on a self-indulgent look at me road trip from Europe to Australia, and think it’ll be clever to pass through Iran en route – one of the most dangerous countries in the world governed by homocidal theocratic psychopaths with an emphatically declared genocidal hatred of the west. These pricks no doubt thought it would all be fine, might even prove that all this hype about a country that’s run as an Islamic theocracy is actually full of warm, cuddly, bearded teddy bears. So what happens? They get banged up accused of being western spies. Surprise surprise! And now they, and their family, want to complicate the diplomatic chaos of the Iranian war with pleas for their release. How do they think a death obsessed fanatical Abdullah, who thinks nothing of murdering thousands of his own citizens, is going to respond to that? Take pity on them? Or see this as a bargaining chip with the weak and sentimental infidel?
No sorry, fuck em. You choose to flaunt all of the very clearly stated warnings in favour of a vanity project that is no doubt also motivated by some soppy middle class lefty determination to show what lovely people the carpet kissers are, you fucking deal with it when you get banged up in a filthy medieval prison cell and are left to the mercy of your cuddly tormentors.
Nominated by : Balsamic Dave
Craig and Lindsay Foreskin more like.
As daft as a chimps foreskin, no mistake.
14
Climbing Everest has to be one of the most stupid things it is possible to do.
First up, it costs in the region of £50k for all the travel, kit, guides and training required to even consider reaching the peak.
Then when you finally get near the top, theres a fucking queue of other stupid cunts, all waiting their turn to take that selfie they think will make their friends green with envy. It won’t. But they will be amazed at your missing toes and fingers lost to frostbite. And that’s the best possible outcome.
The worst possible outcome is succumbing to the harsh environment and becoming a way marker for generations of other fucking idiots to navigate by.
See ‘Green boots’ and ‘Sleeping beauty’ for just two such incidents.
If I ever wanted to see the top of Everest, I’d charter a plane and fly over it, while sipping a gin and tonic and making wanker signs at the twats freezing to death on the summit.
37
@odin…harsh 🤣 but fair… I’d prefer a good ol’ spitfire and straffe the instagrammers…arseholes at 6 ‘0 clock going in …rat a tat tat 💥
8
Fuckwits at one o’clock!
Tally ho!
5
someone said to me,
hey mis how’d you fancy going to some red hot oven of a country,
get eaten by mosquito
the shits from the food
and internal parasites from the drinking water,
then go get in a cage underwater with a big fuck off shark
or jump off a bridge on a bit of elastic while some long haired surfboard twat shouted
‘go for it dude!”
Let’s just say I’d be less than enthusiastic.
i like calm.
a sedate holiday.
hanky on my head in a deckchair.
Danger is best avoided.
like Americans.
26
Adrenaline junkies.
Hey look at me!
you all looking?
look what I’m doing,
I’m crazy aren’t I?”
fuck off.
I’m always happy when one of these tit’s faceplants off a tower or bridge,
eaten by sharks
buried in avalanche
or the parachute fails.
The God’s of Commonsense dispensing natural justice.
wow dude, Kai sure hit the ground hard.
gnarly.
hes spread over 20ft.
i filmed it all.
my commiserations.
hey look, his teeth imbedded into the pavement.
19
Now that I would laugh at.
13
Just while I’m thinking about it, other high profile trips that ended badly include:
1. .That billionaire and his kid going to see the Titanic slowly rusting away in a capsule made of ply wood, fibreglass, expanding foam and P40 isopon
A loud bang was the last thing anyone (including them, probably) ever heard.
Their remains were brought back to their grieving family on a couple of shoe boxes.
2. Silly Italian tart Pippa Bacca’s attempt to hitch hike across the middle east in a wedding dress to promote peace and unity ended badly when she was raped and strangled in Turkey.
Pippa’s last thoughts were probably “I wonder if all Muslim cocks taste like goat shit” as she had the life choked out of her.
3. Vittorio Arrigoni was a virtue signalling Italian fuckwit who thought that jihadis were just misunderstood little teddy bears who needed a good hug and a sing song round the camp fire to stop their murderous jihadi ways.
Turns out Vittorio was wrong. Very wrong.
He was beaten shirtless and then strangled by his pets.
All four of the people are proud recipient’s of the Darwin award.
25
Excellent stuff, chaps! Wish I had time to cuntribute today.
Fucking work!
11
Is upskirting now considered work, Cunt Engine?
19
Add in that cunt that went to the North Sentinalese cunts , perhaps to impress rhem with his Game’n’Watch, or whatever.
Quick check … it was a fucking bible! And his body has never been recovered.
The cunt(ed).
https://is-a-cunt.com/2018/12/john-chau/
Must have a read of that one later.
8
The North Sentinel islands are what the rest of Africa would be, like if we hadn’t tried to civilise it.
We failed, obviously. But why try and civilise another bunch of backwards, ungrateful savages who are only going to survive with the help of Whitey’s magic welfare juju.
14
Can I rehash my North Sentinalese king’s youngest-son’s autobiography joke here?
It’s called ‘Spear’
J. R. Cuntley reckoned the savages did a better job of keeping their border secure with that missionary cunt than the entirety of the U.K. border force do, in that link, by the way.
7
Say what you like about the Sentinelese, they don’t appreciate visitors but they stay put themselves.
7
On the plus side Craig has lost about 16kg since being in prison.
On the downside that Fitbit watch was a waste of money and was stolen by the guards anyway.
10
16kg?
That’s roughly one third of my total body weight.
How much did he weigh beforehand?
4
Fuck me, you are Karen Carpenter and I claim my Carpenters Gold album.
10
What excuses will puppet burnem come up with to keep his job, until the next clown is chosen by the secret society who are keeping we, the sheep satisfied for the time being, when it all begins again on the never ending loop.
12
Rinse and repeat 🤦♂️
4
Sadly so
3
I’ve forgotten her name, but what that stupid cunt we had to pay £500 million to get of an Iranian Prison? Its like those fucking idiots who go to North Korea. Why??? Self important arseholes who cost the tax payers money trying to get the shit for brains out.
12
Ragheadi Romanian Ratcliffe?
Outstanding bill for some tanks or other long forgotten bullshit settled in full £400 million..
For one guardian reading liberal pain in the arse.
Nowt new.
Oven.
18
I remember her. Her husband was a cuck.
12
They should have spoken with the independent travel advice expert ‘Simon Calder’ he’s a cunt too.
16
i suspect adrenaline junkies, adventure travellers and the suicidal are one and the same.
And the reason “Do Not touch’ ‘Danger!’
and ‘Hot Surface” signs are so commonplace.
These are the types that as kids think abandoned fridges are the best place to hide.
The type who go swimming in reservoirs when it’s 30 + temperatures.
They’re best kept a eye on.
never know what crackpot shit they’ll get mixed up in.
it starts with a skateboard and ends in the morgue.
cowabunga!!
10
I have 40+ jumps under my belt from years past and were a helicopter to land on the lawn here today and offer me a ready packed rig & a 2.5 mile lift … I’d be on that like a shot.
It’s the moment of exit & the freefall, Mis. Bonerific! 😄
(I never mixed or socialised with the other club members, as a caveat .. no interest in any of that formation bollocks either ; went there, jumped, left.)
If you’re looking for cunts in this sort of vein, .. these fucking types that go to the places with the big floor fans and hover a bit in the updraft in full safety gear … they’re the cunts in my book on this score.
What the absolute fuck is the point of that one? …
5
if a helicopter landed in my garden crushing the lavender and making a racquet I’d put a brick through his windscreen.
7
I have been known to launch myself of Mam Tor on a hanglider.. nowadays though it’s a paraglider, hangi’s are to heavy to carry up…🪂
6
Back in the day in Oireland I used to fire myself out of helicopters on an ejector seat.
3
Bejaysus!
1
The only person in government talking any sense is our spokesperson, Rupert Lowe. Whilst he’s talking sense, stupid cunts are trying to shout him down. What’s the matter with these idiots, other than benefiting these stupid cunts for help riff-raff.
13
https://youtu.be/Ro2tAEBoNDI?is=7UyQ6n-Sskq2Zq3Z
This is my case in point.
4
AK-47 bullet to the head.Twats.No sympathy.
6
Asked to comment Diane Abbott described Britain’s strained relationship with Iran and its ongoing war against the U.S as a catch-32 situation.
12
When King Andy offered to let Diane back into Labour she was in three minds over whether or not to accept.
Anyway, now that she’s back in the fold she’s on cloud nineteen and working 27/4 for her constituents.
12
She did oppose Starmer and his digital ID plans saying it was like George Orwell’s 1987.
11
Amateur’s.. i have just booked a holiday to Ceuta, I have packed my Muhammad is a pedoʻ. t-shirts.
Not to worry horse faced n̈aźi ursula von trapp, is sending two eu commissioners to deal with it.
13
Perfect.
All will be well then.
All 5 divisions of the cunts will be shunted to Gravy Train Britain.
Ladies get your chastity belts from amazon today.
Sickening vermin.
11
Imagine when those caramel-coloured cunts make it to mainland Spain and start raping and killing young women.
Even the leftie Spaniards might do something about traitor Pedro Sánchez…presumably a WEF plant like Burnham?
18
Just when the Spanish thought things couldn’t get any worse, there’s this from the BBC.
‘UK Prime Minister Andy Burnham and the French president have offered to help Spain’
Is this some kind of sick joke?
13
One short paragraph, SO much bullshit …
“Andy Burnham has sought to reassure the public that the UK remains in control of Channel migration after Spain’s escalating border emergency reignited concerns about Europe’s ability to manage irregular migration”
***
‘In control’ : yeah, right.
‘Escalating’ : try fullblown
‘Reignited’ : as if it had ever gone away
‘Ability’ : INability
‘Irregular’ : Illegal
15
If he sought to reassure the public, he failed good style here, Cuntemall.
It’s so very simple.
Stop paying France to rip the piss and laugh at us.
Stop paying any benefit money to anyone in our country illegally.
Stop giving them medical treatment.
Stop housing them in hotels. Put them in old military camps, with a hammer, a bucket of nails, some tarp and wood batons.
Here you go, make it waterproof.
Stop issuing visas to any country who refuses to take economic migrants back.
Stop giving financial aid to any country who refuses to take their people back.
Just stop.
If there’s no reward, no pot of gold at the end of the rainbow, there’s no point in paying anyone to smuggle you into England.
14
Burnham is cunt of a plastic PM.
He’s quick to come out in criticism of some footballist cretin called Infantino who just wants to use the game to more money (stupid fans are actually the problem but that’s another story).
Fucking football when the country is facing a national emergency worse than anytime since 1066.
Fuck off Burnham you seventies throwback.
16
So says our ‘irregular’ no mandate Prime Minister.
12
I’ve seen some things in my 70+ years, but the state we’re in now takes my breath away.
Are people blind? Why can’t they see what you and I clearly can?
I cannot believe the majority of people want our country full of non-English speaking parasites. I don’t, I’d rather have a tapeworm.
I’ve just read a fucking news item that says some foreign cunt is allowed to bring 18 of her ‘close’ relatives into the UK, under new rules following a human rights court decision.
I’d write it up as a cunting, but I’ve got to the stage where I have given up.
15
I see the great Italian defender Franco Baresi has died after surgery. He was part of the top AC Milan side of the late 80s and won the World Cup with Italy in 1982. RIP to one fucking great player.
7
Apologies to Balsamic Dave.
Your excellent nom, which I fully agree with, seems to have got hijacked.
I’m guilty, so please accept my apologies.
5
Such is the insane state of affairs JP every nomination has to have some flexibility..
The deluge of utter shite that swamps right minded gentlemen and ladies is quite unrelenting.
If we can’t “vent” here then I fear many of us would simply burst.
Your health sir and Good Evening.
14
To be fair, JP, we’re all guilty at some point.
But it’s a long old day with just one nom, and we all need to let off steam.
More nominations is the way forward, so get typing, cunters.
Stay at home!
Get cunting!
Save the NHS!
Or something like that.
10
I hope they’re both getting bummed from dawn ’til dusk, on a daily basis.
The daft cunts.
Let’s dance…..
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g_QtO0Rhp0w&list=RDg_QtO0Rhp0w&start_radio=1
6
Good evening 👍
2
Let’s be honest, we’ve all made similar mistakes to this couple.
Last year, I drove through Bedford. Every other car on the road was full of people who looked like the bad guys from Team America. I felt confused and traumatised, wondering where all the people who were really from there had vanished to. Luckily, I made it out and was able to return to England.
Recently, I foolishly drove along the north-bound M6 as it passes Birmingham and experienced the deranged nature of Asian and African driving. One tailgating me to within two inches whilst I was already doing 80 and approaching a speed camera, whilst the other was undercutting me so I couldn’t escape the dreadlocked, female psycho who filled my rear view mirror. Who needs a white knuckle ride when there is the British motorway?
Yes, I’ve done some foolish things recently… I’ll probably tone things down for a bit now and take a holiday to Afghanistan.
8
Try driving in Slough, Count.
Every minute of the day is like some kind of computer game based on rush hour in Karachi.
It’s either some clueless park key wimminz in her husband’s Mercedes, or some small dicked Amir Khan in his Audi A3 giving it the biggun.
The only way to shake them off is to find a road with speed humps.
They hate them more than dogs.
12