An emergency whoops-duckie, whose after my seat? cunting for this elderly, lump-wristed old queen, who sits on his well used arse every weekday morning, being one of the girls in a show described as “the crown jewel” of daytime TV (This Morning), which if true, shows how shit daytime TV is.

This old uphill gardeners has been taking over the tabloids for the best part of the week – it seems he and his fellow lady presenter have been hitting each other with their handbags (metaphorically) in recent weeks – just an ordinary girly squabble but this powdered old drama queen has taken it further and has now apparently consulted a lawyer AND a PR man – I hope the latter remind him you can’t polish a turd.

He has had a long career, mincing round gushing at “celebrities” and womens fashion, time now for a younger poof to take over. Phil, nobody loves a fairy when he’s forty. Remember that.

Metro

Nominated by W. C. Boggs.

More on this self confessed liar below from Chuff Chugger

If think the point of this additional cunting, that it has since come to light in the last few days (a few days AFTER he said he would be standing down, which joe public assumed to be because of his family connection to his kiddie fiddler brother…and the historical issues with him denying he was gay, then admitted he was and then admitted he had been having secret gay sex whilst also sleeping with his wife…and the rift which this brought on between him and Willoughby)

Well, that’s what I thought..but that now clearly isn’t the case…on top of all that it has transpired he was ALSO having an on off affair with a junior male work colleague…which he had previously denied. And I suspect this was what the rift was all about and the straw that broke the camels back. Making him more of a cunt than previously reported in an earlier nom of the same week.

Bbc news

Cunters be aware to avoid words that will put you into they spam bucket on this nom also stay the right side of legality C.A.

News from across the Channel, cunters. As we all know, our Gallic neighbours can always be relied upon to provide much entertainment by rioting and setting Paris ablaze, at which point the CRS wade in and crack lots of skulls. Great fun to watch.

Step forward one Victor Immordino with a street protest of his own. Victor teaches English at a school in Paris and he gave his students prior warning of what was going to be in their baccalaureate exam. Unfortunately the school changed the questions at the last minute and, quelle surprise, the kids all failed. ‘Catastrophic’ was Victor’s response, who then took the 63 papers outside, tore them up and set them alight as a protest against ‘the system’. The pupils had studied English for 7 years and could barely string 2 English words together, he complained. A strange coincidence, because most school leavers in this country can barely string 2 English words together either, but I digress.

What is really bizarre is that almost all the YouTube comments support him – it’s all the fault of ‘the system’. It has, of course, nothing to do with the fact that Victor is a fucking useless teacher, he tried to cheat and he got caught out.

Sadly it seems that Victor has foie gras for brains, because Inspector Clouseau takes a dim view of this kind of thing and he could be looking at a ten year stretch. I don’t know about setting exam papers on fire, Victor, but after a couple of weeks in the slammer your bum hole is going to feel like it’s on fire.

Ooh la la!

Youtube

the news.com

Nominated by Geordie Twatt.

Slimfast are cunts …
… for this fucking Ad.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ab9uHuExUsY&t=2s

The Ad on TV is 30 seconds long while this seems to be a shortened one for the young twats on ChikChok.

I thought it was a fucking spoof when I first saw it because the advocate is a fat fucker who doesn’t get any slimmer. Meanwhile, all the clowns who fall for his shit rap don’t need the shit he’s peddling.

I’d buy his shit if it came from Colombia, And if it did, he needs to get high on his own supply, the fat cunt.

From Wiki about the fat cunt.

‘Tyrone Mark Lindo (born 16 November 1985), known by his stage name Big Narstie, is a British MC, author, rapper, singer, songwriter, comedian and television presenter.’

Of course he fucking is. What is missing from his (no doubt self-written) bio is that he’s a fat, talentless cunt.

Nominated by : Dark key cunt

They say that rock ‘n’ roll will never die. But sometimes you think that it’s time for some crock ‘n’ rollers to call it a day.

I see that The Who (or what’s left of them) are on tour again. Now the band’s a legend without doubt, but it’s been a while since they were the voice of teenage angst. Daltry and Townshend have got 160 on the clock between them, and it’s all starting to look and sound creaky. They should have called it a day when the legendary Entwhistle died.

Then you’ve got the likes of Macca and Dame Elton still out and about in 2023, both of whose voices sound shot to shit to me. Rod Stewart’s knees and ankles have had it by all accounts, but he’s still hurpling about on stage. It’s a bit sad really. Saddest of all was the sight of Phil Collins on stage last year. He looked like an old and sick man.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=luFUSM9r9o0

Why do they do it? They can’t need the money, so is it the buzz, or the need for status and admiration? Would you bet against The Stones going out on tour again, even though Mick and Keef look like a couple of rejects from ‘The Lord of the Rings’?

Time to think about retiring gracefully lads, before it all becomes a bit demeaning.

Nominated by : Ron Knee

With an encore by General Cunster:

“All rock ‘n’ rollers over the age of 50 look stupid and should retire.” -Grace Slick

I would like to second this nomination and provide this link in support:

https://rocknheavy.net/5-reasons-why-grace-slick-was-right-28f36bca8197

These bands were the iconic voices of a generation. I’d like to remember them as such and not as comic caricatures of themselves.

 
Ian Clifford is a cunt, who is Ian Clifford ford I hear you ask, I’ll tell you.

Ian Clifford is an It engineer cunt as most of them are, but this cunt has been on the sick for 15 years, getting paid and is now suing the unfortunate company who employs this workshy cunt because they haven’t given the prick pay raises across that period of time. They have paid the free loading cunt sick pay for the previous 15 fucking years while he has been on his work avoidance scheme, but now that isn’t enough, the cunt wants more.

So in all fairness what possible injury/illness can stop you being a fucking It engineer, if he worked for me I would be dropping off 8 hours of work a day for this piece of monkey shit to do, 365 days a year and then making his life a living hell if he doesn’t hit his quota.

That or implode the company and reopen under a new name without the free loading parasite sucking on my ball Sack, honestly it’s such a risk employing people nowadays, if only you could just stop his money and see how long it is before this fucking bluebottle come buzzing around looking to do some work, I bet he is out of his wanking chariot the very same day.
So you sponging, free loading Clifford you are a treble cunt of the highest order, like a cockroach you would probably live through a nuclear bomb and still expect your money… What a cunt

Metro

Nominated by Fuglyucker.