Slimfast are cunts …
… for this fucking Ad.

The Ad on TV is 30 seconds long while this seems to be a shortened one for the young twats on ChikChok.

I thought it was a fucking spoof when I first saw it because the advocate is a fat fucker who doesn’t get any slimmer. Meanwhile, all the clowns who fall for his shit rap don’t need the shit he’s peddling.

I’d buy his shit if it came from Colombia, And if it did, he needs to get high on his own supply, the fat cunt.

From Wiki about the fat cunt.

‘Tyrone Mark Lindo (born 16 November 1985), known by his stage name Big Narstie, is a British MC, author, rapper, singer, songwriter, comedian and television presenter.’

Of course he fucking is. What is missing from his (no doubt self-written) bio is that he’s a fat, talentless cunt.

Nominated by : Dark key cunt

58 thoughts on “SlimFast

  1. Wow what a bio, is there nothing that man can’t do.

    Oh that’s right lose weight.

    I imagine he’s toilet looks a big nasty after a fried chicken evacuation.

    • Steven Hawkins advertising trainers.

      Stevie wonder advertising driving schools

      Maxine carr advertising dating sites,

      They don’t work.

      Like this fat blob of shite advertising a slimming milkshake.

      What were they thinking?

      A talentless fat n*gger is a talentless fat n*gger .
      It makes me NOT want any product endorsed by the slug.

      I wouldn’t wash my arse with slimfast.

  2. I’m MC White Pree-ledge and here’s my rap breakdown for today:
    Yo yo yo rap is crap an Dat is Dat!

    Mic drop

    Afternoon all.

  3. As stereotypical as Ali G, even more so since he is actually black. A man far too old to be pretending to be a south central Los Angeles gangbanger. For real cuz.
    I can’t see the point of the advert unless it’s simply “you don’t wanna be a fat fucker like me.” But then I’m not a yoot with a fucked up brain. It’s a mystery.

    • Too right Freddie.
      The cunts about 50yr?
      Playing the rapper/ hip hop , DJing, urban thing.
      Fuck off.
      You go bed at half ten.

      Take your trainers off.
      Rest your bunions you tub of shite.

  4. I thought Eminem was the real SlimFast Shady?

    Dunno who this Big Narstie cunt is? Look at his porky little fingers!

    • After seeing him on some awful “comedy” programme, I’d have to disagree with this nom’s calling him a “talentless, fat cunt”.

      He’s a loud, thick, irritating, talentless, fat cunt.

  5. Not sure what message the advertisers are trying to get across?

    Drink Slimfast and turn into a porker?

    Someone should have explained that it’s a substitute for food, not something to wash a family sized bargain bucket down with.

  6. If you need a caterpillar to tell the difference between head and neck, its time to take the pills.

  7. I can’t stand the sight of the fat inarticulate cunt but grudgingly admit that he might just make a decent job of advertising Steak and Kidney or Melton Mowbray Slimfast.

  8. Well apparently the black Kate moss started his weight loss regime 4 years ago?

    So fuck knows what he looked like before.

  9. Well I just think it’s great to have a black person on an advert for once.

    • They just got the sex wrong.It should be a fat black woman like the rest, just so we all get THE MESSAGE.

  10. The only way to keep weight down, is for every establishment to use entrenches from old football stadia.

  11. OT soz

    But I hope those Scouse cunts Everton get relegated today.

    Would make my fucking day. I think they’ll stay up sadly, but here’s hoping…

    • Everton and Leeds to go down. Everton need the lesson more than Leicester, and Leeds… are Leeds.

      • As it stands at half time the Mickey mousers are going down.

        I still think they’ll spawn their way out it, but if they do go down, I don’t think the fans will accept it and go home gracefully.

  12. Fucking funny…..even the woke advertising execs fail to realise putting a fat obviously overweight cunt in an advert suggesting he’s using it, is a poorly judged decision to tick not only the blick woke box, but the non body shaming one as well.

    Just like the bud lite cock up

    • The fat cunt needs less of Colonel Sander”s bucket and more of Colonel Saito’s hotbox. Ingerish plisonels.

  13. Demented fat cunts, take your cretinous rap crap and die.
    It is a nice afternoon cunters.

  14. The living embodiment of a pisshead kebab,a three day old jumbo sausage roll and a vindaloo shat out under a bush in a park..

    Plus it’s wearing some sort of disabled mental patients rompers suit..

    Fuck me,make it walk up a flight of stairs and watch it’s heart explode.


  15. Big Narstie seemed to rise to fame as I was abandoning the TV. He had Stephen Fry and Carol Vordernan on, or was that Never Mind the Buzzcocks?

    Who knows? it’s all cack.

  16. Slimfast are definitely missing a trick as kelly brook is also involved with the advertising campaign.

    Ditch harvey prices stunt double and have kelly put a bottle of slimfast between her ample cleavage.

    Sorry what was I talking about..

  17. The only thing that fat cunt is advertising is Diabetes, heart disease and a stroke.

    Judging by the way it acts and talks, it may already had a stroke.

  18. I’m not sure thatI understand the psychological reasoning behind this as an advertising approach…

    • Pretty straight forward Ron.

      If you have a bit of extra timber on your waistline.
      Drink a powdery milkshake called Slimfast.

      In no time you’ll be a irritating, obese,
      black borderline simpleton.

      Which will stop you worrying about a spare tyre.

      • In US hip hop circles a ‘ big narstie’ is slang for following through and shitting your pants after being bummed in prison.

        I think this is flattery in this case and he should change his name to Bucket.

        Because on every level he qualifies for a abortion.

  19. The ad is rubbish. Sounds like cacka from the same lot who made ‘Are you gonna Bingo?

  20. I want to watch him doing a big narsty all over Kellys fantastic jubblies and watch her eat that 5 calories. Yum, good to see you back Dark key cunt.

  21. slimfast came out in 1976 i was 20yrs old at the time and according to my mum (5’4″ dumpy woman) said it was fucking shit, never one to mince words my old gal and the only way to lose weight was to stop shovelling food down yer gob every 5 fucking mins… here endeth the lesson!…. Oh and big narstie is a fat useless cunt did i mention that?

  22. Big Narstie: regular on Blankety Blank and Michael McIntyre’s The Wheel. Intellectual giant. Looks and sounds like a 10 year old.

    Slimfast: Bring back Barry Bethell. Oh…. They can’t.

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