We seem to be in another crisis, folks. It hit the stage in September 2022 and to this day, the cunt is still abusing UK households on a daily basis.

The advert is for 3 communications and is branded as : “life needs a big network.”

At first, this advert was just annoying. The stupid Wallace and gromit-esque gormless cunts expressions, his lispy weak chinned pronunciation, and the frequency of the advert. Nothing sinister just really annoying, but it will be OK: persevere and it will fuck off and be replaced by a more annoying advert 3 months later.

Fast forward to May and we have nearly had 3 financial quarters of this bullshit. Over the last 2 weeks I can’t escape the Gravlax cunt. I get him 3 times a day, across the TV, iCunt and mobile phone. It’s almost like I am being forced to have a homoerotic relationship with Mr Gravlax.

However, watching it under a different lens and I found another issue with it.

It’s the lack of ambition and aspirations that his mixed race in laws have… You know the score. Stupid honkey cannot order anything other than burger, chips and beans.

The 2 cunts are so impressed that he orders the Gravlax with such a solid conviction. Fantastic, now I’ve ordered a salmon dish, I’m good enough to bang your daughter… Cheers.

And of course they are right to question his lazy privileged honkey ways: the daft cunt doesn’t have a fucking clue what Gravlax is, and 3 has to step in and save him from his privilege colonising background.

I won’t let this get to me anymore… Now where did I put the lemon rind, white peppercorn and freshly picked dill sprigs…

Youtube

Nominated by Cunt Executive Officer. A refreshingly original cunting CEO, C.A.

‘Oh no, those poor dogs!’ Oh no, the Met are horrible! Mark Rowley is Satan and Hitler rolled into one!’ ‘Justice for the two dogs killed by the Met!!!!!!’ Fuck off you whining cunts, the fact is the idiot owner allowed those two dogs to attack that woman’s dog. That means that, by definition, the dogs were out of control. The Met were incompetent and definitely overreacted but contrary to what these deranged ‘fur parents’ think they hardly acted in cold blood. This silly cult of worship surrounding dogs – and the outrage surrounding efforts to protect the public from dangerous ones – has got to stop.

Dogs Today Magazine Link.

Nominated by : OpinionatedCunt

It’s that time of year. The thermometer in dear old Blighty has finally moved off “second ice age” and we have got a balmy 15degC or so. What happens? The cunting blue-bottles are out in force.

Where the fuck do they come from – I know it’s maggots, but where are the fuckers?

Are they fast asleep in my carpet, just waiting to emerge as fat, annoying bastards.

Either way, flies are cunts.

Nominated by : Lord Cuntingford

Assistance provided by : MMCM

A link on Calliphora Vomitoria to help this nom on its way –

https://www.buckinghamshirelandscapegardeners.com/news/how-to-get-rid-of-flies-from-your-garden

Ugly fuckers and a complete pest.

 

A fucking huge, does my arse look big in this cunting for these stupid looking leggings and the women wear them when posing, sorry training down the local gym waiting for blokes to notice them [ but only blokes they like otherwise they are considered p-verts].

So bear in mind these days half the time tits, arses, teeth, muscles [if your into that, I’m not]hair and even teeth are fake.

So finding one of these cut and shut bitches is like buying a Mondeo at the auction, its a bitza [bits of this bits of that] and what you have underneath is a well used, high mileage worn out old wreck with a lot of filler, history and a sloppy box.
Honestly it is like polishing a cow at the cattle market, get it home and what you have is totally different from when you went shopping, if your really unlucky you will get a bloke.

Fab fit

Nominated by Fuglyucker. It’s your cunting Sir but from the pictures I’ve seen I’m not sure why? C.A.

“ADHD affects black women” – ‘it’s time our stories were told’

It seems that a largely imaginary condition is also racist.
Apparently there isn’t enough diversity in ADHD documentaries.

What a country we live in.

It’s a fucking disgrace.

Msn.com

Nominated by Cuntstable Cuntbubble.