Deadpool [176]

Congratulations to King Cunt who correctly predicted the demise of the McCain family matriarch Roberta McCain would be next to conk out at the grand old age of 108.McCain was the mother of the late presidential nominee John McCain widow of navy admiral John S McCain Jr.As well as outliving her husband and son her daughter Jean died from mesothelioma aged 85 last November.She was seen on her sons ultimately unsuccessful campaign trail in 2008 and was present at his funeral in 2018 with images of her hunched in a wheelchair bidding a heartfelt goodbye which was widely covered in the media.Partly for the fact that it was old McCains Mother who was still with us when he seemed ancient!!!!!Anyhow her demise was announced by her daughter in Law Cindy on Twatter in the last few minutes!

On to Deadpool 175

The rules:

1) Pick 5 famous Cunts you think will conk out next.It is first come first serve.You can always be a cunt and steal other peoples nominations from previous pools (Like Black and White Cunt frequently does.

2) Anyone who nominates the World’s Oldest man or woman is a cunt who will be ignored.

3) It must be a famous cunt we have heard of.

4) If your pick has already been taken, tough tits, it’s first come first served (only because we can’t be arsed to check )

My nominations:

Sandra Day O’Connor
Carlos Menem
Tim Curry
James Whale
Dai Davies

People In General

People, the common masses, poltroons in general are cunts….I will elaborate with a few examples for your edification.

People who jump red lights.

People who pull out in front of me and then immediately turn right.

People who queue outside dirty old chip shops to get their fill of chip lard.

People who queue onto and block the road so they can get McDonalds trash food.

People who pay £75 per month for a mobile phone.

People who take a massive trolley full of junk through the basket only line.

People who wear masks on the street and alone in cars…you’re only going to smell your own farts in there.

Old cunts driving at 7am in the morning to nowhere, joggers, Tailgaters,
temporary traffic light operatives, puffed up “essential workers” etc etc

You are all indeed a cunt if you are mentioned. II have missed anyone, sorry but you’re a cunt too.

Nominated by: Spanky Mc Spank

 

Mary Berry [3]

An icing sugar and self raising cunting please for this hoity-toity, up her own decrepit arse old tart, who, because she became a “national treasure” for making a few French fancies on the telly is going to be awarded a damehood for her trouble:

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-8802613/Mary-Berry-dame-Queens-Birthday-Honours-list.html

Fuck me sideways with Jess Phillips mammoth strap-on. and no lube – why?. The silly old cow does what she is paid to do on some low rent TV shows for middle class wimmin and poofters on the telly. She hasn’t discovered a vaccine for Covid19, she has just tarted up a lemon drizzle cake (the drizzle probably provided with her own piss).

There are far too many of these self regarding old bags with a plum in their mouth and a condescending attitude getting silly titles. (Jenni Murray, Baroness Scotland for example) come to mind. This can only encourage other self satisfied old matrons like Eddie Izzard to try for a title. The honours system really needs winding up for useless cunts like these. Fuck em.

Nominated by: W. C. Boggs

Women’s Logic

I once saw a bit of graffiti scrawled on a bog wall which read ‘women’s logic is like a stick with three ends’. It’s an observation that I’ve found increasingly difficult to challenge over the years.

Now Mrs K is the absolute light of my life. She’s smart, sassy, kind and caring, and an absolute honey. But Christ, the logic of her ‘logic’ can take a bit of keeping up with. It’s as though she goes from ‘a’ to ‘e’ without the benefits of points ‘b’, ‘c’ and ‘d’ in between; an ‘I went to the shops to buy a blouse, but I saw some shoes so I bought a hairdryer’ sort of thing.

Take yesterday. She was off to the salon to get her hair, eyebrows and nails done. ‘I’ll be some time’ she trills (no shit Sherlock), ‘as I’m going to Morrison’s as well to get some gluten free bread’. ‘You look lovely, my sweet’ says I, when she duly returns (flattery can get you anywhere). ‘I’ll make sandwiches for lunch’. ‘Oh, I got a couple of bottles of almond liqueur and some gin at the shop’, she replies, ‘but I didn’t get any bread. They wanted £3.50 for it, and it’s only £2.70 in Asda. I’m not giving the bloody robdogs that for it, so I’ll just have crackers’.

‘Hang on’ says I, baffled. ‘You’ve just spent over a hundred notes at the salon, not to mention the money on the booze, but you’ve denied yourself some bread for 80 pence? What kind of logic is that? I’ll never understand how women think’. ‘Humph’, she snorts, that flinty Scots gleam in her eye, ‘well, I’ll remind you of those words the next time you’re pulling my pants down’.

I mean, huh? Wtf? I quickly fathomed that this was going to be one of those ‘men are from Mars, women are from Venus’ exchanges that go absolutely nowhere, so I retreated to the kitchen to make the lunch.

So is this an obtuse tactic that women deliberately deploy to keep us off balance, or are the little darlings actually just daft as a fucking brush? Buggered if I know.

Nominated by: Ron Knee

Peter Tatchell – Fucking in the Bushes (3)

The forever student and pathetic activist is in the news again.

No, he doesn’t have Covid, he’s complaining about measures that Southwark council have put in place to stop gay men cruising in Burgess Park, and having sex in the bushes.

It also addresses drug dealings and knife crime, but Mr Tatchell considers it homophobia, and that the LGBTQXYZ69 community should have been consulted on these actions, which have included cutting back bushes to stop gays having sex in them. Complaints included a woman with small children witnessing three men having sex in the park one morning.

What the fuck is wrong with these cunts? It’s hardly underground, and hasn’t been for over thirty years, yet the depraved cunts still get their kicks from fucking strange men in parks and toilets. Yet Tatchell sees nothing wrong with this behaviour, and defends it.

I don’t want to see straight people fucking in public, so I definitely don’t want to see a bunch of shitty cocks pounding away in one of the few places you can actually walk through.

And they moan when they get aids….

Nominated by: Gutstick Japseye

(He has also gone on record supporting sex with children – DA https://www.dailymail.co.uk/debate/article-1311193/PETER-HITCHENS-Question-Who-said-Not-sex-involving-children-unwanted-abusive-Answer-The-Popes-biggest-British-critic.html)