Moped Thieves need a cunting.

Whilst there is no pity for a snowflake having its iphone snatched uploading a selfie or uploading the last meal from Starbucks on instagram – the hitting up females and elderly handbags and screaming off at a gutless speed elevates them to the High Order of Cunts.

The latest Met decision to ram them is only a good one if they are allowed to hit reverse and roll back over on the cunt.

As the hue of skin colour starts from shit brown and goes to Ebony – I am taking bets to how long a court case will be for a Javed or the next aspiring architect to make a million and a new house for the trauma of being knocked off his Chinese vespa following his last hit at Sainsburys.

These cunts should stick to knifing each other.

Nominated by King Cunt

A cunting for “held under the Mental Health Act….”

Yes my friends 2019 has started as 2018 ended , with more piss boiling cunty actions of the establishment.
Want to suppress the public’s concerns that another “peaceful” has attacked the very country he was born in/immigrated to ? Tell them he was mentally ill.

Shouting “ally snackbar” is irrelevant , it’s not another attack , the poor sod is a basket case, his family has said there were issues years ago blah blah blah.

Same with the Paris one . Supposedly the cunt was telling other Muslim looking ones “don’t worry, you’re ok” as he walked about shooting cunts with a hand gun , but he was mentally ill as well right enough…….

Our betters fucking know the scale of the sickening disdain we are held in by a minority in this country who have a disproportionate effect on the rest , but choose to do fuck all except tie our coppers’ hands when they need them most

I will probably receive a visit and be held under the Mental Health Act for posting this no doubt.

Nominated by Squint Cuntwood

Nomination: Technocrats who aren’t.

I have nothing against the idea that some questions require expert technical knowledge. I wouldn’t tell my doctor how to write a prescription, my lawyer how to draft a will nor would I tell an architect how to design a bridge. People get paid for expertise, it’s a no brainer. I would listen to Richard Dawkins if I wanted to learn about evolution rather than a priest or imam who has read one book.

Unfortunately, the ‘technocrats’ who run most international organisations are anything but. The supporters of the EU (for example) claim that the people who run this organisation are better at solving technical problems than the elected politicians in national parliaments. This doesn’t stand up to scrutiny. Since it came into existence on 1st November 1993, the European Union has faced three major crises – the Yugoslavian war, the 2008 financial crash and the ongoing Syrian refugee crisis. In every one of these situations, the ‘technocrats’ at the EU either abdicated responsibility (Yugoslavia) or made a bad situation worse (Syria).

That Canadian prick who heads the Bank of England whilst drawing the thick end of a million quid in salary draws praise from financial journalists for his doomsday predictions about a no deal Brexit. Not one of these nobheads predicted the crash in 2008 but apparently they know the exact shape of the world economy in 2030.

Fuck them. (Copyright, D.Fiddler esq.)

Nominated by Cunt’s Mate Cunt

I nominate high street banks, the few which are left anyway.

Once upon a time, in the good old days, you could get everything done at the cashier’s till. Pay in, take out cash, sort out standing orders, switch funds etc….

Now you can only use the cashier to pay in or take out cash. Anything else and you have to give your name to some twat who hovers around, carrying a clipboard, then wait ages to see an ‘adviser’

The only way to avoid it is to do online banking, but I don’t trust that because of all those hacking cunts trying to steal my dosh, bastards.

Time to put all my cash under the mattress.

Nominated by Mystic Maven

New Year’s Resolutions are for cunts, aren’t they.

~ be a better person
~ speak more to my family
~ become healthier
~ do the DIY jobs in my house

Why practise this false psychology? Who does it really benefit? Surely this prosaic tradition is for weak-minded plebs who have no self-control. The only thing these empty vessels love more than chasing their mediocrity is declaring their chimeras on soshul meeja. The whole concept has the stale odour of ‘motivational speak’ about it. I’m embarrassed for these gung-ho noodles when their gym membership card is accumulating dust in February and they’ve cracked open the Malbec by the 7th January.

Balls to empty goals and promises, bollocks to Dry January, resolutions can shit off.

“Hey Magnanimous, are you going down to the gym to further your training?”
“No, I’m going up to the Off Licence to further my Wet January.”

Nominated by Captain Magnanimous