Trail Cameras

Posted on September 7, 2022 by A Cunt Who Cunts Cunts

So it has been many years since I walked these harrowed halls, but like a waif I have returned with tales of woe,

Trail Cameras, They are cunts.

Now long in tooth and fair of heart I have taken to caring for my mother, who surprisingly enough is more decrepit than myself, a widow hitting 80 and of limited mobility she spends her days commuting between bedroom and lounge.
Her pride is her patio, bird feeders and bird bath, she make a morning ritual of pouring the contents of the kettle over any offending weed that dares to show its head amongst the paving.

A while ago she commented on a new arrival, a strange bird that she struggled to identify due to poor eye sight and the speed of the bird.

Being a dutiful son I bought one of my trail cameras round (a motion activated camera) and set it up on the patio to capture on film the little visitor.

Two weeks later I collected and downloaded the camera and to my surprise found that I had set it to video capture 5 seconds.

I had 314 little films to flick through to find the mystery creature.

Anyway I set about the edit, mainly a sodding pigeon of which I had approximately 200+ films of, a couple of cats at night, a hedge hog and most traumatic of all, my mother bending over to dowse a weed in boiling water in her night dress and no knickers!

Some things, you cant un see, I have seen my place of origin in graphic technicolor detail, I don’t know who the cunt is, me for putting the camera there or her for exposing herself .

Obviously I have wiped the images from the camera and my laptop, with the aid of alcohol I hope to strip the other one from my memory

Nominated by: lord benny(not quite deceased, but close)

(In case you’re not sure what trail cameras are: Day Admin – Trail Camera Guide )

Keeping Dangerous Pets

Posted on September 7, 2022 by A Cunt Who Cunts Cunts

Let’s keep a dangerous pet. What could possibly go wrong.

How about this, then?
Just what you want to see when you’re on the throne.
It’s harmless, apparently.
Anyone lost a cat, dog, small child recently?
I cannot believe the idiocy, 18 foot python, the ideal pet, for a mong with 2 braincells.

BBC News Link

Nominated by: Jeezum Priest

Ben and Jerry’s (3)

Posted on September 6, 2022 by A Cunt Who Cunts Cunts

Apparently the ‘ethical’ board of Ben & Jerry’s (those of the fucking expensive ice cream) wish to prevent the sale of their products in Israel because:

‘The ice cream maker’s board argued that its social mission could be undermined’

To which a judge said ‘Like fuck will it’ or words to that effect

It’s a but cuntish for the board to state they have a ‘social’ conscience, yet this was seemingly absent when they accepted the Unilever buyout of $326m and sold their moral arses in return for shitloads of cash.

Stick by your principles- fine, but don’t sell them then complain after.

BBC News Link

Nominated by: Chuff Chugger

Pakistan’s Flood Appeal

Posted on September 6, 2022 by A Cunt Who Cunts Cunts

The U.N. wants a $160 million aid package for Pakistan, but a figure of $10 Billion has been suggested as an early estimate to sort out the clean up.

Floods have made a “bit of a mess” down there. Killed just over a thousand, out of a possible 230 million. It wasn’t their fault. It’s all about us westerners burning that fossil fuel stuff.

The fact that many of these places are a bit overcrowded, with many dim cunts having more than twenty kids, that I am surprised the death toll isn’t much higher.

As one of the most seismically active places on the planet, an earthquake might have been more exciting, like the one back in 2005.

I suppose it would all now be blamed on climate change, just like any other disaster.

Nominated by: Lord Scunthorpe

Helpful link provided by: DCI Gene Cunt

Indi News Link

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And seconded by: Duke of Cuntshire

I’ll second this nom, after a brief search reveals that ambulance chasing charities have sprung up all over the place.

Ooh goody, another disaster we can milk for administration fees, and give maybe four pence in the pound to victims to try and make it look legit.
Here’s one example, theirs plenty more.

Tearfund Appeal Link

In any event the shithole that is Pakistan was worth nowhere near the amount of funds people are suggesting. This is the same country that harboured the world’s most wanted terrorist, shoots girls in the head, and sends child rape gangs to the UK.
By the will of Allah, the toilet has finally been flushed.