Now an odd nomination you have to admit, but what exactly is a wound?

It would seem in modern day speak it is a puncture to the skin that can be catered for by an Elastoplast or maybe even a blob of blue tack!

This could very well be due to my far from normal upbringing and a rather unusual first aid back ground.

My version of wound, is Gun shot, knife, severe or nasty and I expect a fuck off big adhesive pad to cater for it!

in all honesty I have had to cut most dressings down to cover wounds, so rock on 30 years and chuck in a bit of surgery.

I have just had a little bit of surgery, I have one wound Morse coding up my leg at two feet, second leg 3 holes each 4 inches in length.

Anyway I chose to have a bath which will require a dressing change, so I removed the jigsaw dressing made by the lovely nurse and got into a lovely bath of antiseptic and hot water to soak.All went well, a lot of dead tissue separated and left me with 3 points of concern and I dutifully dried making ready for my new dressing.

On opening the packet I discovered that the “wound dressing” would not have covered my knee as a child when I came off my Raleigh Grifter and was more suited to covering a large boil.

Wound? name a fucking inch square wound that is not a graze! Fucking woke, big up merchants have no idea what a wound is!

Fortunately, being of the Blue Peter Generation I was able (without sticky back plastic) to make a continuous dressing that did not touch the wound line (fucking 4 out of a pack of 5 that cost £3.99 per pack) .

Now I have patched myself up, glued my legs together, but fuck me the woke generation have a lot to answer for, do you wonder why there is an overload at A&E?

Buy a wound dressing from boots and you will find out!

Nominated by: lord benny(not quite deceased, but close)

When I was working full time for an employer some 5 or 6 years ago a common bugbear of mine (and some of my colleagues) was the holiday rota for Christmas and Easter.

It didn’t matter how early I put in my holiday request to have Christmas and New Year off as holiday, there would always be someone in the office putting in a last minute holiday request arguing that “I have kids!” and therefore must have preference over those who don’t have kids.

Inevitably they got their way both at Christmas and Easter, while those of us without kids had to live with this form of discrimination without loud complaint and work through those holiday periods year in year out.

Last night I was in the dining area of my local pub enjoying a rather nice meal. We were fortunate enough to have booked in advance because the room was packed, bar one empty six-seater table with a “Reserved” card on It waiting for its customers to arrive.

Shortly afterwards a family of 5 appeared at the entrance of the dining room (2 adults, 3 kids). They were arguing with the waiter. From what I could hear over the hub-bub of the packed room, the waiter was politely informing them the only table available has been reserved for another party and they would have to eat in the bar.

“But we have kids!!” moaned the mother as 2 of the 3 kids started to moan out loud with impatience of having to wait around.

Fortunately the waiter stood his ground and wouldn’t back down. The mother continued to argue the toss demanding to see the manager. However, by chance, the family of 6 who had reserved the table arrived, much to the relief of the waiter and showed them to their table.

The two kids moved from moaning to crying and their mother said to the waiter. “You have upset my kids. I hope you’re satisfied!” before the brood walked out of the room.

This sense of priority entitlement really gets on my nerves: just because you have kids should not mean you should have preferential treatment whenever you demand it!

Nominated by: Technocunt

This is a real piss boiler, any which way to call Racist.

It involves Lady Susan Hussey, who is not a cunt, former lady in waiting to the late Queen.

The attached link from the good old BBC reports that at a function hosted by Camilla about violence against women Lady H had a conversation with Ngozi Fulani where she clumsily (assuming the conversation was reported accurately) tried to establish Fulani’s heritage.
Posh royals do tend to speak in a way which isn’t ‘normal’ but from what I read it was far from racist, but don’t let that get in the way of sticking it to the royals (wait for MeAgain to wade in)

Who is Ngozi, well I am fairly sure I cunted her some time ago when her organisation Sistah space had their ‘office’ fitted out courtesy of Hackney council and then kicked off because they said it wasn’t suitable.

Lady H has done the honourable thing and resigned from her duties in the royal family to save further embarrassment but I firmly believe she wasn’t being racist.

Looking at the way the Nigzol was dressed anyone would assume she had flown in from some African shithole.

BBC News Link

Nominated by: Sick of it

And supported by these guys:-

Chuff Chugger

W.C. Boggs

Miles Plastic

Wanksock 

Lord Cuntingford

CuntyMcCuntface

and

Fuglyucker 

(There were so many long and detailed nominations for this cunt that we decided not to cut & paste each one into a consolidated nom otherwise it would have been far too long and almost unreadable. Therefore we are crediting the authors instead. Fill yer boots! Thank you, guys – Day Admin)

A nomination for shill critics and over-generous star ratings for films.

I first noticed this when I used to read Empire, the film magazine. There was a trend towards giving the big, crowd-pleasing films from Hollywood four or five stars. The same happened with melodramatic ‘Oscar bait’, even when it was terrible.

Nominated for eight Oscars? slap 4/5 stars on it.

I’m not exactly a film snob (i’ve seen more of the Marvel films than an adult would dare to admit) but some of these reviews make it quite obvious these critics are getting some sort of perk from the studio. It’s the only way they could find any of the recent Star Wars films palatable, or any of the recent awful series being made by SJW cunts.

Sadly, when the critics aren’t brown-nosing studio executives and directors they find a way to critique a film based on their liberal politics.

‘Transformers’ (2007) was shit for all sorts of reasons, but I remember Mark Kermode bringing up his sixth-former understanding of American politics to criticise Michael Bay and his films in general. Those criticisms may have been valid in a general sense, but not pertinent to the actual film. He also banged on about the way Megan Fox was leered at by the characters and the camera as ‘problematic’.

It’s a film for teenage boys you greasy, rockabilly cunt! Give the Marxist-feminist film theory a rest.

He’s since dribbled over unfunny tripe such as Don’t Look Up, because it’s actually about Trump and his voters, isn’t it? It’s such a brilliant satire! Aren’t we clever… Orange man bad!

Nominated by: Cuntamus Prime

It has come to my notice that Prince Harry Halfwit and MeGain Markle are to receive an prestigious award for their “heroic stance against the structural racism” of the royal family.”

Independent News Link

The award will be given by Kerry Kennedy of the Robert F. Kennedy Human Rights foundation.

According to Kerry, Halfwit and MeGain “went to the oldest institution in UK history and told them what they were doing wrong, that they couldn’t have structural racism within the institution and that they could not maintain a misunderstanding about mental health.” Eh?

FUCK OFF.

Nominated by: Minge Juice Bottler