Womens tennis

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I don’t know if Womens tennis has been cunted before and if it hasn’t it’s about fucking time it was.

I like to watch a good MENS tennis match but what the women serve up is absolute fucking dross. Thankfully Gigantor Serena Uppity Williams got a kicking in the final by the Kraut Kerber. Get this tho, 1 hour and five fucking minutes!!! Fortunately for the punters who no doubt had shelled a kings ransom for the privilege of watching the winner pick up £2.25 million notes and runner-up £1.25 same as the men got to see Djokovic and Nadal finish of from the night before.

Not only that but the first semi between Anderson and Isner went on for 6 and half fucking hours. Love it or loathe it you have to admit that is some going. So what about tarts tennis then, I’ve no doubt that any of them would struggle to face up to a game against a low ranked man or even a good wheel chaired man.

The money they get is fucking embarrassing and if they have got to continue to pay this stupid money they should at least make them help tidy up the place afterwards and help with doing the fucking dishes or something. Robbing cunts.

Nominated by Kendo Nag

Justine Greening [2]

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EMERGENCY CUNTING – The lovely, delectable Justine Greening is calling for a second EU referendum.

Three options. Option 1- Theresa May’s “fudged deal”, Option 2- Leave with No Deal, Option 3 (you’ve guessed it) is to Remain in the EU.

Well Justine, you stupid bitch we have ALREADY voted, and we (the majority) voted to LEAVE so absolutely no need for a second vote. Article 50 has been triggered, and we are leaving. As the EU threatened us initially “once article 50 has been triggered it cannot be reversed and there is no going back” (unless it looks like you are not sure and then perhaps it can be reversed).

To cite a game show we were told that a Deal (means we stay) or a No Deal (means we leave). No third alternative.

As in another game show to quote Anne Robinson (in the event of No Deal) suggest we tell the EU quite simply that you can Fuck right off, and “that you leave with nothing”.

If only we had someone in government willing to step up to the plate and tell these EU cunts what they can do. After all, its only our fucking country at stake.

I cannot put into words how much I hate our politicians for what they are doing to this country and to my (and other peoples) mental health.

Cunts.

Nominated by Willie Stroker

Computer Game Addicts

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If you have an unhealthy interest in computer games, you are not an addict. No, you’re an oxygen-stealing, waste of DNA cunt. Switch off your console, talk to people, get a girlfriend and get a job. If you want to get battlefield experience, join the Armed Forces. That said, they tend not to employ cunts.

Games developers are also cunts. These people are undoubtedly talented, but if they are diverted their energies into curing cancer or solving the world’s ills, we’d all be happier.

That computer gaming is now classified as an addiction is another sign of how snowflake cunts are dragging society down the pan.

CUNTS!

Nominated by Sgt Maj Cunt

Gerry Adams [3]

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Gerry Adams is a cunt…

Of course we all know he is, but now this twat is whining because he’s getting a bit of overdue payback… Former Sinn Féin president Gerry Adams has called on those who attacked his home to meet him…. Adams asked those responsible to have the “gumption and guts” to meet him and explain their actions….

Explain their actions? Like his IRA mob of murderers explained killing military personnel, police,civilians, war veterans, pensioners, children, and royalty alike? Not to mention attempting to murder the British government, and bombing British cities and ruining several businesses and buildings in the process… This piece of Fenian filth has absolutely no room to whine about being attacked by anyone… Cunt!

Nominated by Norman

Key fobs.

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I am going to nominate a key fob

Now I was given a key fob by an acquaintance. we all like to please and use the gift given.
I took my car down the car wash big mistake, next thing you know it’s tumbleweed time, they all fucked off leaving partially washed cars and yours truly high and dry with a dirty car.
However I must admit I did this on purpose after the first reaction at my local kebab shop.
Pulled up went in ordered my food , the guy at the counter spoke to the cook popped out the back for a fag and 15 minutes later no kebab and no staff.
The reason as far as I can tell would be my key fob.

It says “home office border agency” they are available on e-bay (item number listed below)<

However don’t buy one unless you are willing to wash your own car, have a barbeque and don’t like curry!

Nominated by Lord Benny