@European fruit pickers.

Not long into the lockdown, there was a plea from UK farmers about European pickers are needed or else we will all starve. Now a few things need to be established about this. Yes it’s hard work. Yes it’s no everyone’s first choice of a job. Yes it’s seasonal.

You also have to bare in mind that the pay is crap. The conditions are crap. Assuming there are not enough people in that area the distance is too far. The answer was fly in Europeans who are happy to get shit money, live in piss poor conditions, but still by their standards earn a fortune. With all this in mind they bussed in said Europeans….No tests, no doubt no security checks etc.

Here we are a few months later and one of the poor poor farmers who pleaded that without these special people we would starve and they would go broke there has been an outbreak of the fear bug. 73 of of them. So enforced self isolation has been imposed…..except 3 of them (1 being positive) have upped and fucked off. No one knows where. with this in mind I would like to nominate en-mass EVERY CUNT THAT WAS INVOLVED, with a heartfelt FUCK YOU to all.

Nominated by halloweenjack

I see that actress, “lifestyle guru” and twat Paltrow is at it again, “challenging people’s perceptions” about, er, candles.

Cunters will no doubt recall (how could we possibly forget?) that some months back, the 47-year-old LA airhead launched a candle called “This Smells Like My Vagina”. This retails on her “Goop” website for a mere $75 a pop.

Not one to sit on her fortune (if you’ll pardon the expression), Goopy Gwyneth has followed up with a new candle entitled “This Smells Like My Orgasm”. Chirps the website, “where ‘Orgasm’ is bright, vibrant and uplifting, ‘Vagina’ is more deeply sensual, warm and seductive”.

Well, as ludicrous and pretentious as it sounds, good ol’ Gwynny has undoubtedly spotted a gap in the market, and is cashing in big time as the candles fly off the shelves. Indeed, there appears to be a waiting list; I ordered an “Orgasm” for the wife which she’s desperate to have, but I’m told that she’ll have to wait some time before it comes.

Nominated by: Ron Knee 

Ken Ham is a cunt, isn’t he.

Who’s this wacko and why does he look so unevolved? Ham is an Australian creationist now living in the States and has called for Charles Darwin to be “cancelled.”

“The intellectual and philosophical heritage of Charles Darwin is one of the most hideously racist legacies one can fathom.” He continues that the ideas of Darwin (one of the greatest ever Englishmen) “…fuelled racism. Hitler, and his idea of a superior race, used Darwin’s writings to justify what he did to the Jews and others.”

Hambo built a big Ark that cost about $100 million and is part of an amusement park for Fundamentalist wingnuts who believe the world was built in six days. It sits on wooden stilts in a park in Kentucky and has never touched the water. Just like the one in the story.

In case you’ve forgotten, the story of Noah is the one where God, the bearded omniscient deity, is angry with his creation and decides to murder everyone in a giant flood, except for those who’ve kissed deity arse the most. He tells Noah to build a massive boat and to put two of every creature on board in a strange, desultory, incestuous concept. They’ll all be safe while God is busy drowning all the sinners.
Goodness.

You don’t have to be a wide-eyed believer to visit the Ark but you mustn’t mention ‘dinosaurs’ if you do.

God was not available for comment because he doesn’t exist

Nominated by: Captain Magnanimous 

The Institute for Fiscal studies.

The organisation has released a statement today which included this, “managing the elevated debt from the pandemic would be a task for not just the current Chancellor, but also many of his successors.”

When the fuck are these wallopers, not just here, but worldwide, going to wake up and go after the real culprits. The sinks should be raked over the coals and taken for every penny and asset they have for what they have done.

Nominated by: McCunterson