is a cunt.

It’s just before 9am and I have pulled into a motorway service station for a coffee and a piss.

It’s sunny and quite warm and there are a dozen or so people sat around outside at the various tables and on benches.

Each and everyone of them are staring at their mobile phones.

My first mobile phone was in a car and was installed about 40 year’s ago.
It cost me about £3.000 if I remember correctly.

It was hard wired into the car.
It had its own dedicated speakers and microphone.
The handset was on a cradle between the front seats.

I needed it because I was a busy person doing a job that involved a lot of travelling.
Thankfully the company that I was with paid for it.

But even though car phones were a novelty I didn’t use it that much.
I didn’t need to, but it was there when required.

On an average journey I may have received one call.
I may have made the occasional call but more often than not the phone was unused.

I look around now and I see nothing but people with their faces stuck into their mobiles.
Youngsters, housewives, scruffy bastards who are probably not working.
All of them intently staring at their phones.

Go to any restaurant and you will see entire families or groups of friends silently looking at their mobiles.
There will be no conversation at all.
Even when eating these people will have their phone propped up in front of them. Probably watching videos.

Why is it that nowadays everyone, regardless of their age needs to be constantly stimulated?

It seems that nobody can spend any time at all without being informed and entertained.

I remember watching an episode of Star Trek.
There was a game which the crew had started playing using a special visor.
It was so addictive that everyone was playing it all of the time.
Nothing else got done.

The episode was about how this game had been planted on board by an enemy and how easy it was to control the crew and eventually take over the ship with just the use of entertainment.

With the misinformation and propaganda on the Internet and so readily available, I believe that we are quickly heading that way.

wiki

Nominated by The Artful Cunter.

Let’s put our breathing apparatus on again to inspect the shit stained sewer that is the top of the “government of (self) service”, in particular it’s cheap trollop of a deputy leader, Rayner. who, it seems, is yet another “close friend” of that generous old poofter Lord Alli. Now the old tart is a fag hag, it seems. She accepted a free holiday in America, so she could go down on her ex boyfriend Sam Tarry – a man she loved so much she was prepared to see him thrown out of his seat in Ilford South to make way for the turbaned twat Jas Aswal, a man who seems to have as many questionable businesses as Del Boy.

She seems to think that, despite telling the audience at the End Of The Kweer Show in Liverpool, the government “has to make tough choices” (hardly an original catchphrase with this shower!) it was perfectly all right for her to go to America to stay with her ex-lover with everything paid for (including for Mr Tarry as well, one assumes – I wonder if she charged him his usual fee for her “services” though? – including his obligatory trip to the clap clinic when he came home.)

We all know the bow legged old whore is desperate for cock, but there should be limits. God knows what she will be getting up to – or down on – in Liverpool.

bbcnews

Nominated by W C Boggs.

as been replaced by cunt behaviour.

Proof, if proof is needed that the reserved British stiff upper lip and decorum in social interaction has finally been dragged down to the lowest common denominator, here is a story in my local online ‘rag’ that confirms it:

kent online

Just look at the shit queueing up for cheap ‘tats’
Sports Direct account holders…all of them

I am ashamed this is what the level of sophistication the British public have come down to…I blame Blair and his ‘cool Britannia’ ideals.

Nominated by Chuff Chugger.

I’m not yet retired, but I can see it on the horizon. As such, I’ve started watching YT videos about how and when to transition from working full time to being a cunt of leisure full time. Some videos encourage you to retire as soon as possible, while others tell you to never, ever retire. What to do?

Many of the videos touch upon what having a full time job provides. Income obviously, but also work related benefits, a purpose, a life structure and to a degree, some (work related) social interaction. By definition, not having a full time job means not having those things:

• No earned income, so you’d better have enough saved. How much is enough?
• No benefits, so you at least better get your health insurance someplace else. Is the Yank system of Medicare and Medicaid any good or are they as shit as the NHS? What are they? What do they provide? How do they work? Fuck knows!
• No purpose in life. Your career skills, knowledge and experience no longer have direction and meaning. Oh dear.
• No life structure around being employed. It’s the end of the TGIF feeling, cramming everything into a Saturday so you have at least one day to relax. But Sundays always feel different (worse) because you’re back to work the next day. When you’re retired, that sense of urgency and some days having a certain feel is over. Every day must feel exactly the same. Do they?
• I work remotely so have never met any of the people I currently work with. One or two are OK, but the rest can all fuck off. No great loss if I’m honest.

To combat this sense of being cast adrift, some videos make some suggestions for transitioning into retirement.

Part-time work:
Corporate America is a vicious, back stabbing, hypocritical, hostile, stressful and toxic place. I’m really looking forward to not having to deal with that anymore. So I don’t think this is an option for me.

Hobbies:
My main hobby is collecting music. I don’t need more time to do that. I like playing video games too. Not sure that’s a hobby. The enjoyment of doing anything though is in part determined by its finite duration. If you could do whatever you wanted for as long as you wanted, would it be as enjoyable and fulfilling? I could start a new hobby of course, but I’m not that handy. I really only have two hand skills. After working in IT for 30+ years, one of those skills is obviously typing. Not sure the other ‘skill’ counts as a hobby and it certainly isn’t new. ?

Volunteering:
Just fuck right off. I’m not helping anyone for free. That’s just not going to happen. Admittedly, I do have a head full of skills, knowledge and experience, but I absolutely refuse on principle to use any of it to help anyone who’s not paying me.

Cultivating friendships:
Some videos suggest cultivating friendships now which will last into retirement and provide social outlets once retired. Trouble is, I don’t like most people and actively avoid being in the company of others. Being around other humans invariably leads to small talk which I perceive as an interrogation without purpose. I don’t want to be questioned about what I do (did), where I live, where I go on holiday or what my kids do (I don’t have any – thank fuck). Equally, I’m not interested in other people’s interests or life story. I just don’t care. Leave me the fuck alone!

Travel:
Travel seems to be popular with retirees. The catch here is, Mrs. Yank is several years my junior so she’ll be working full time and earning a wedge for quite a while before she retires. Good. She also works from home so will be under my fucking feet 24×7 when I have fuck all else to do. Bad. So me getting out of the house might extend her life expectancy. Seems a little selfish though to raid the retirement fund for my own first class flights, 5 star hotels, crack cocaine and high class hookers, but we all have to make sacrifices somewhere. ?

So there you have it. Keep working and piss more of your healthy years up the wall for an employer who doesn’t give a shit or quit the rat race and have nothing to do, nowhere to go and no one to enjoy it with?

Retirement is (potentially) a cunt. What say you?

YouTube.

Nominated by : Imitation Yank

So this is more climate change bollocks Jeezum?, C.A.

Actually, that’s a headline I made up, so don’t panic just yet.

However, this news item seems to indicate that, due to a poor hop harvest, there may be a shortage of ale, folks.

It’s all due to climate change, naturally.
Stock up now, Lidl/Aldi do decent beverages at reasonable prices, maybe buy the Missus a bottle of Country Cream, too.

Fuck em all.

shift environment

Nominated by Jeezum Priest.