It is articles like this that remind me why I have to stick warning labels on tools and equipment saying things like don’t stick your dick in here.

Now why the fuck you would want to go public about your child ripping here hair out with a rotary scrubber is beyond me.
If you had of been a victim of Dell Trotter and purchased a hair drier that subsequently turns out to be a paint stripper, I would understand.
So here goes. (Warning graphic images)

BBC News.

I did warn you, she has tattoos on her fingers too! mind you it mentions Norfolk so probably webbed feet too.
I do not believe this statement
“Amy said that when the brush arrived, her daughter picked it up and “it just came on, the brush flew off.. and just sucked her hair in”.”
Some kind of Chinese killer bog brush!

Now if admin stick a big picture on the top, it will be a suitably long article.

sorry I should add this on.

“Norfolk Trading Standards contacted Temu, and said the company told them the product had been removed from sale in Britain at the manufacturer’s decision.”

Probably because they think we are a nation of fuckwhits based on this woman’s outburst and our immigration policies.

Nominated by : Lord benny

BBC News.

Sacré bleu, DEI goes Gallic and Bonaparte’s jewels go awol..

The female French Culture Minister appoints the first female Director of the Louvre, who in turn appoints the first female Head of Security. All very diverse and progressive, and much to the delight of the woke French Establishment. What could possibly go wrong?

Well everything, actually. Thieves zoom up a 40 foot extendable ladder from the back of a lorry to a balcony, break their way into a gallery full of priceless artefacts with no CCTV, then help themselves to France’s Crown Jewels IN BROAD FUCKING DAYLIGHT DURING OPENING HOURS. They escape the way they entered and the outside CCTV camera faces the wrong way.

Apparently les dames felt the Louvre was too high-brow and they wanted to make it more accessible. Well they certainly succeeded.

Nominated by : Geordie Twatt

“Good afternoon. This is IsAC’s political correspondent Ron Knee reporting. You know, as the station’s roving correspondent on every subject under the fucking sun, I receive many comments and questions in my in-box. But perhaps the most common contact is made by people reaching out for help, and here’s a classic example; ‘Ron, I feel that I have the makings of a true cunt, but need help to get started. Can you advise?’ Regards, Samuel Williams.

Well indeed I can Samuel, and here are some tips which I’m sure will be of assistance. First of all, it can be a help in getting going as a cunt if you’ve had a disadvantaged start in life. I note that you lived your formative years on the mean streets of Royal Tunbridge Wells, and ended up at dead-end Balliol College, where you’re studying PPE, a subject barely one step above transgender studies. This is good, because it all helps to grow the massive chip you have on your shoulder.

The next step in becoming a cunt is to get yourself a cause. I believe that climate change was your first choice, but this is passé, so have a look at being pro-Palestine instead, it’s 2025’s fashionable cause.

Now pay attention because this next bit is vital.Having chosen your ‘I’m a cunt’ cause, you’ve got to back this up by words and deeds, and cultivate your image as a social justice warrior. So get yourself one of those tea towel thingees to wear, and a loud hailer. Naturally you’ll need something to chant, so you and your chums might hold a workshop to come up with something really catchy. For instance, this could be something like ‘Gaza Gaza do us proud, put the Zios* in the ground’. This I think has a certain Byronesque charm to it, without being too nasty. Don’t shout ‘death to Israel and Israelis!’, or anything as crude and unsubtle as that. We’ll get your meaning. Oh, and it won’t do your street cred any harm if you get your photo taken posing with a toy rifle; a picture being worth a thousand words, as they say.

So there you go; all you need to do now is go out into the street and get your chant going. Congratulations; I’m pleased to award you your IsAC Diploma in Cuntitude, First Class; you’re a fully qualified cunt.

One last point. I’d advise you to see past the immediate situation and think of your future in the longer term. If you see being a cunt as your career, you can take your PPE degree, join the Labour Party and become a special adviser, as others before you have done.

I hope that you’ve found this helpful Samuel. If anyone else needs help or advice, I’d be happy to oblige, and can be contacted via the site. But for now, this is Ron Knee, for IsAC, returning you to the studio”.

*short for ‘Zionists’, so that it scans.

Daily Mail Link

Nominated by: Ron Knee

is a cunt.

Seems there’s quite a bit of argy bargy in the countryside as permission for a mosque has been granted by the local council.

Not to worry though,to quote..

“But Faizudin Ahmadi, who was granted refugee status last year after fleeing the Taliban, said asylum seekers were “just ordinary people”.

The former barrister lives with other Afghan refugees in Barrow, where he works as a garage mechanic while learning English, with a hope of resuming his legal career to help other asylum seekers.”

Well that’s fantastic news then.

bbcnews

Nominated by Unkle Terry.

is a cunt.

Well who could have forseen this, apart from absolutely everyone but Kweer Starsole?

Unfortunately the ‘One in One out’ scheme to mash the sausages didn’t take account of Border Farce’s current BOGOF offer on its cross-Channel ferry service. So Mr Mohammed Yoyo has returned to bestow upon us some more of his cultural enrichment.

This time I suggest Moyoyo gets himself in front of Judge Fabian who surely will agree that he can’t be sent back to France again on the grounds that he’s allergic to Brie and finds the sight of Brigitte Macron offensive (don’t we all?).

You take your immo in, your immo out
In out in out shake him all about
Etc.

bbcnews

Nominated by Geordie Twatt.