Eddie Redmayne is a cunt, isn’t he.

Ohh, you regret playing a trànnie in a film, do you? Isn’t that ypur job? Play-acting people you’re not? You’re not Danish either.

This tedious prick hasn’t apologised about playing a disabled person or any of his other roles. Perhaps he’s attempting to curry favour because they’re fanatics who will try to stop your career. It’s a waste of time. These shrill turds won’t accept it.

If you’re serious about apologising about putting on a dress and portraying a man who pretends to be a woman by putting on a dress, then return all the cash you were paid and find a job delivering pizzas, you cowardly, little shitbiscuit.

BBC News Link

Nominated by: Captain Magnanimous

Helpful links provided by: Ron Knee

YouTube Link

CNN News Link

This is for supermarkets for putting shite in a previously nice ready prep dish. Do they really think adding mushrooms instead of salt would fool us?

I have an allergy to mushrooms, of all things, so bad I have to carry an EpiPen.

Normal mushrooms just give me a rash and a fever, but the more exotic kinds could kill me, so Morrisons, explain why, for some reason, your Spag Bol ready prep suddenly has mushrooms in it?

Answers written on the back of many £50 notes, please, you cunts.

NHS Info Link

Nominated by: Jeezum Priest

Party politics is a system that no longer works, not just in the UK, but elsewhere as well.

There are many areas in the UK where a person will get elected to parliament purely on the colour of the rosette that they wear regardless of their abilities.

There can be nobody in their right mind that would vote for a racist, retarded, black woman who can’t dress herself correctly.

Dianne Abbott for instance, is a Member of Parliament only because she represents a party that the majority of her constituents have always voted for.

She may be the prime example of the system failure, but I don’t think that there are more than a handful of Members of Parliament that would have been elected on their own merits.

The elation that these people show when the election results are received is not because they are finally in a position to make positive changes for the lives of the people that voted for them.
They are elated because they have won a lucrative job, far in excess of their abilities, and they can live their own lives with their snout in the public trough for the coming years.

There can’t be many members of the tax paying public that agree that they should pay for their chosen candidate’s food, drinks, housing, travel, duck houses and every other expense that can possibly be claimed.
But that is what comes with the job.

Out of the rabble that get elected a Prime Minister will create a Cabinet of croneys who, for the most part have absolutely no qualities to do their jobs.

A Health Secretary who is not a medical professional.
A Foreign Secretary who can speak no other languages.
A Defence Secretary who has never served in the armed forces.
The list goes on…….

When a Cabinet reshuffle is called for the stupidly continues.

The Chancellor of the Exchequer, who was given that position despite the fact that they could not balance their own personal finances is moved to the position of Climate Change Secretary, having no background in science whatsoever. For instance.

The role of the opposition party is now ridiculous.
They see themselves as being there to criticise every action of the ruling party.
Even when it is clear that there is a solution to a particular problem the opposition will argue purely out of principle.

The solution to this complete fuck-wittery is to do away with party politics all together (although I realise that turkeys do not vote for Christmas).

Each constituency should be given a list of candidates to choose from based on their abilities and vision for the future for the electorate in that constituency.
Any mention of an affiliation with a political party will immediately bar a candidate from standing for election.

A reasonable salary and scrutinised expenses should be the reward for the job.

If you divide the population of the UK by the number of Members of Parliament then each elected member would be responsible for just over 100,000 people.

For an intelligent, motivated and independent Member of Parliament, with vision and determination, that is not such a big deal.

Nominated by: The Artful Cunter

The wife’s not long back from Asda. As we were having a cuppa, she says “you know, I think I’ve seen it all now”.

“What’s that dear?” says I vaguely, trying to look at ‘Villa Talk’ on my laptop.

“They’re only selling what they call ‘limited edition’ toilet rolls. ‘Orange and bloody cranberry enriched’ they call it. ‘Unwrap the scent of the season’. I bloody ask you”.

“I trust that you declined to make a purchase dear” says I. “I much prefer to use ‘The Guardian’, as you know”.

“Very funny” says she, “but do you remember a while back when Walker’s (was it?) tried to flog chocolate covered crisps?. They’ll use Christmas to cash in on anything. It gets my goat”.

I know what she means. Talk about cynically trying to use the festive season to squeeze a buck until it squeaks. I mean, orange and cranberry bog roll. You wouldn’t wipe your arse on it.

Asda News Link

Nominated by: Ron Knee