What can I say? Every fucking ad break on the channels I do not watch as a non payer of the telly tax, appears to be advertising funeral plans from some dodgy grifting cunts pretending to be ‘empathetic’. Well, I can tell you now that I am in no way persuaded to pay you 3 grand to stick me in the waste disposal bins on my expiry. I intend to have a magnificent bier of plumed black horses to fly tip me in a location unacceptable to the majority of the population and whoever I decide to leave my not inconsiderable inheritance to can fucking we’ll pay for it.
(Links hopefully added by you magnificent fellow cunters)
Nominated by Kunte kunty, link by Unkle Terry.
I like the funeral adverts.
They are the only adverts on telly without any wógs.
Good morning.
7
True enough – if they did do one showing a traditional funeral from that culture it would show a woman being burned alive at the stake whilst being spat at and having stones thrown at her.
5
that’d be good 👍
4
If a funeral director went into providing services for young robertsons stabbed to death in London, he’d do a roaring trade.
As would wreath-makers who made their presentation with the legend ‘he was a good boy, he wasn’t in a gang’.
As none of them ever are.
6
“Rest in peas sojah, U is wiv de angles now.”
7
A gang,or a Troop ?
2
“He wuz a good boy, turnin his life around, n sheet”
1
,They’ve got it completely wrong.
what sells a funeral isn’t this
‘ and think of the burden to your family …
no, ‘what sells a funeral is the buffet.
only reason people attend.
They should get into partnership with Farm foods orr Iceland.
big display of sausage rolls, mountain of vol au vonts,
if it’s a cremation, throw some jacket spuds in too,
maybe let the grandkids toast marshmallows.
Funerals are for the living.
the dead don’t care.
5
All my family have signed up to a no frills funeral package,
you snuff it, taken and burned,
come back in a cardboard box,
no ceremony
no church
no fancy coffin
no vicar..
Like a fuckin pet rabbit.
Accept me.
I’ve not signed up.
got nothing in place.
Once I’m dead I’m someone else’s problem.
They’re going to have to put their hand in their pocket or get busy with a shovel.
4
I’m sure it won’t be long now before the govt offer a subsidy to these cunts,offering a discount if you decide to “voluntarily” die just before state pension age.
Good morning.
3
The mother in law watches a lot of GB news so I’ve seen the adverts on that channel of outrage,definitely one of these adverts had a wóg in it.
I advised the old dear to cut the plug off her telly but she didn’t hear me.
Deafness can be a boon I suppose.
2
I see Transport for London have banned some funeral ads from buses and the tube for having the potential to cause offence.
How an about this?
‘Proposed adverts from Beyond showed beachgoers running with coffins rather than surfboards – with a pun on “roasting temperatures” and cremations’
Mildly amusing, perhaps.
But if you’ve recently lost a loved one or are facing death yourself, it’s most likely downright distasteful.
The money grubbing cunts!
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-45018525
0
On the subject of adverts – I’ve noticed a recent trend towards ads that feature mixed race brats who are coldly indifferent towards or embarrassed by their white grandparents.
All in the name of good humour mind
I imagine John Lewis and the team are putting a new, anti white Christmas ad together for 2026 as we speak.
Cunts.
Good morning.
0
whatever way I go, either put in an ⚱️ along with the other people’s ashes or buried in the soil for an insect feast I will be disappointed if anyone leaves the do sober 🍻🍷🍾 obviously with an argument or two as regards the ⚰️ being regaled with a BNP flag 😩…. I’m on the highway to hell 🎙️🎸…ooh er vicar
0
I should like to be buried in Østre Kirkegård in Roskilde please.
With a simple granite headstone from the stonemason on the corner of Kornerupsvænge and Jernbanegade. Opposite the flat where I first moved into when I hit Denmark.
I’m only telling you lot because nobody else listens.
1
TV ads went to shit around about the same time the restrictions on sanitary products were lifted.
Once one taboo is overcome, it’s a small step from discussions about flow and absorbency at teatimes, to bombarding pensioners with ads about funeral plans on daytime telly.
The worlds gone to shit.
0
Here, to save money, people leave their bodies for medical research.
So many in fact, they are now charging people for doing so.
The cunts.
0