Houses covered in Christmas Lights are a cunt.
True to form,these cunting eyesores have started appearing in the less salubrious parts of Bristol,ironic when you consider the price of electricity these days – probably being run off the neighbours supply in most cases. What is the fucking point?. I saw one that had a giant inflatable Santa on the roof swinging a sack. The cunt must have been visible from Space.
Nominated by Mary Hinge
What cunt decided that spraying teeny little sparkly bits on Christmas and birthday cards was a good idea?
Mrs D is cursed with a December birthday and the other day received a card covered in red glitter. The bloody thing was opened on the kitchen table and, being aware of the evils of fucking glitter, has remained there ever since. OK so the fucking table is covered with little red shiny bits that we clean up every day with a damp cloth, but…
Why the fuck am I finding this shit on the bedroom floor?
Why is it on the sofa in the lounge?
Why is it on the bathroom mirror?
The fucking house is covered in glitter! All from one fucking card! It’s even on my face and clothes ffs!
Glitter is a cunt, and any cunt that sends cards with glitter on is a cunt and will be instantly removed from my Christmas card list, the sadistic cunt…
Nominated by Dioclese
I nominate Katsuyori Shibata for being a stupid daft cunt.
For the uninitiated, Shibata is a Japanese pro wrestler, in Japan they prefer to use a wrestling style that is more stiff (i.e they make their moves and strikes, etc hit a lot harder than they should in a worked environment) in order to make what they do look more realistic than what you would see in the WWE.
Now, there’s nothing wrong with working stiff to a degree, but alas, in Japan they have a tendency to go a bit overkill in these things, Japanese pro wrestling in the late 90s was notorious for often descending into flat out head-drop fests which inevitably took a horrendous toll on said pro wrestlers who were on the receiving end of these moves.
Now, in a match with an opponent a number of months ago, Shibata decided to do a spot where he attacks his foe with a series of unprotected headbutts. It ended disastrously. For Shibata that it is. For he collapsed after the match and ended up in hospital where it was revealed he suffered a subdural haematoma and was left temporarily paralyzed down his entire right side. The man nearly died from this. Now he has recovered somewhat but this brain injury has ended the man’s career.
So why, might my fellow cunters ask, am I cunting Katsuyori Shibata? My answer is this – nearly killing yourself in a worked, or if you like, fake, wrestling matching via One. Measly. Heabutt. Spot. is pretty fucking stupid in my opinion.
Was it worth it Shibata? Was it worth wrecking your health and ending your in ring career over one spot in a match you stupid daft cunt?!
Nominated by Prime Minister Sinister
Only interested in sporting pastimes in which YT can cheat and make some dishonest moola but it seems money can be made in a producing capacity in Gaming. More me cup orf tea. Doine me neck orf the woods titles like “Bugger yer neighbour’s Bull” and “Sheep Shag IV” would do the business.
In me book all gamers are cunts because orf the bandwidth they use up. Have a constant battle to connect to this site. Friday to Monday forget it. Just as bad if not worse in the small hours when the hard core are playing “Yank Wank III” with our colonial cousins.
Complain to BT (in India for FS) and Pradesh promises a big server upgrade scheduled for next week isnt’it. Come the big day even more fucking gamers playing ever bigger bandwidth hogging games so back to square one. Withoit gamers the whole fucking pathetic bandwidth situation in this once great nation would be a damn sight better.
Gamers (and film streamers) should all be coupled together with a fibre optic cable plugged up their arses in a dedicated network called a GAN (Gamers Anal Network). Leave the rest orf us cunts to doineload a spot orf porno in peace. “On the Game” ? Now that might be a title orf interest.
Nominated by Sir Limply Stoke
I would like to nominate the Advertising Standards Agency for a cunting.
It’s Xmas and every year in the Northeast we have adverts for DVDs of “The Little Waster” Bobby Thompson.
Most folk outside of the Northeast will have no idea who Bobby Thompson is but in these parts he is a local comedy legend.
Thompson died in 1988 (so nearly 30yrs ago now), never swore in his act, never made a racist slur and his comedy was purely observational of the region, focusing a lot of time on the war years (again observational as to how folk managed and got on during those dark times that would melt the snowflakes of today).
So why have they banned Bobby’s DVD (and I used to listen to this bloke as a kid – because everyone in the family could listen to him)?
Because he smoked on stage (when it was permitted back in the 80’s). Actually he didn’t smoke on stage, he used to have a fag on the go throughout his act but you never saw him take a drag off it.
Not only that, the DVD promoters had the cigarette digitally removed for the adverts but even that was not good enough the Advertising Standards Stasi because they said you could still see “the odd wisp of smoke!”
But the cherry on the cunting cake is the ASA’s list of reasons as to why they’re banning the ad (with the ‘wisp’ of smoke), it…
– Could offend women.
– Upset the recently bereaved, and,
– Encourage heavy drinking.
WTF!?! My Mam and Nan loved listening to “The Little Waster” so the first reason is pure shite – unless of course they mean offense to blokes claiming to be women or bean flickers or snowflakes who can’t cope with the thought of there having ever been a war??
I’d love the ASA to explain what the fuck they mean by the second reason?
And as for the 3rd reason, it’s Christmas for fuck’s sake! As much as you’d like to have it replaced with some tea-total “peaceful” celebration or another, it is still a Christian holiday. Albeit a purile, commercialised cunt of a holiday but Christian nonetheless, and as Christians we are allowed to drink fally-down water, generally do drink to excess, and no DVD would have any impact on that whatsoever!
Yet another example of officious cunts trying to eradicate any form of indigenous heritage which is seen as bad now in all neo-liberal sectors of society!
No doubt the ABBC’s comedy DVD “Nadia’s You’ve Been Beheaded!” will fly off the shelves with the ASA’s full blessing!
Cunts!
Nominated by Rebel without a Cunt!