Wasps

A few days of April sunshine and all of a sudden these buzzing stripy cunts appear out of nowhere. They’re like those Romanian windscreen cunts who hang around junctions with the lights on red so that they suddenly appear next to your car with an oily sponge and a bucket of dirty water splattered all over your windscreen and then expecting you to cough up a fiver for the privilege.

Wasps are cunts, and I don’t care what the ecologists or environmentalists may say about how important they are in the food chain etc. I couldn’t give two fucks quite frankly – they’re cunts, and aggressive little cunts at that. Especially when you have the windows wide open on a hot Spring day, and the cunts slip in unnoticed like a Booshka/Pikey about to raid your home!

Sometimes you can hear them buzzing around in your bedroom, but you can’t see them, but you know they’re there somewhere! And you can’t settle down until you know you’ve found it and either splattered it and/or turfed it back out of the window.

Wasps are the chavs of the insect world: they serve no purpose, always feed off the backs of others, are noisy, have no class, thick as shit and utter utter cunts!

Nominated by Technocunt

Psychopaths

I saw a fascinating film recently about the Hare Psychopathy Checklist method used to profile psychopaths.

The Checklist covers aspects common to psychos such as superficial charm, self-importance, incessant lying, manipulating people, never feeling remorse etc.
It is now the standard method for dealing with psychos who, incidentally, may be suffering from a brain disorder rather than be just potentially violent selfish individuals.

The film claimed that as many as one in five people could be psychos and therefore walking time bombs. So watch out where you leave your axes, drills and power tools and get ready to back off quickly if your good wife starts glaring daggers at you as she starts to sharpen a carving knife. Also, don´t look too closely in the mirror the next time you are shaving as you might see a psycho looking back at you.

Here is a link for you to try out the test yourself. I trust the Earl of Northumberland, Dick Fiddler of That Ilk, will let us know how he fared.
https://psychcentral.com/quizzes/psychopathy-quiz/

Nominated by Mr Polly

Sly News are doing this thing whereby they bring us news of the lockdown from various cities across the UK. Several families in a particular street in that particular city ‘tell their story’.

Well, where did they start? Leeds. One of the more ‘diverse’ cities in the UK, not that I would have an issue with it. Until they mentioned the first family.

‘Hi. I’m a housewife with six children,’ said Nazra or whatever her unnecessary name was.

Family of people of peace.

Cue blood boiling and steam emanating from my ears.

CUNTS!

Nominated by Dark key cunt

Just when you thought it was safe to go out, the weather improves and suddenly it’s time for cycling cunts to appear on the pavements. These motherfuckers are so fucking stupid that they think they’re somehow “saving the planet” cunts ,!! How are they achieving this ? In fact we’re not supposed to be outdoors, particularly if you’re dressed up in Lycra and sweating over everyone. Smelly fucking cocksuckers with stupid hats simply aren’t a welcome sight in my neck of the woods and they need to learn that physical exertion is both disgraceful and disgusting. Cunts the lot of them,

Nominated by Jimmy the Spaz

I would like to cunt The “Sister Cities” scheme.

I was reading some obscure mail to see a town in AUS has decided to cut its ties with their sister city as it was in China and China is full of cunts. Fair play to the mayor of that town for clearly defining he not wanting to be associated any longer with the lovers of fine bats.

Through boredom i decided to investigate who may be the sister city of Wuhan. In addition to Arnhem in NL, Christchurch in NZ, Pittsburgh US, Kiev in ukraine – its pleased to be sisters with none other than Manchester.

Any reason it had to take me being bored from the Bat Flu to have to be the one to make this a bit clearer – what the fuck? Why would any cunt want a sister city with these cunts and if so, not want to be the one to let all know there is a massive cunt in the family? Too busy clapping, banging pots and watching cunts like elton doing his isolation concert.

Nominated by King Cunt