Crisps all round and handbags-at-three paces, as ageing retired footballer Mr Ferdinand seethes again, courtesy of the BBC (who else?) at an incident which occured nine years ago now.

Obviously believing revenge is a dish best served cold he regales us with the frightful incident all these years on:

https://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/football/55074804

Let it be noted he admits to using foul lanaguge himself, so he is no angel, but of course, because of his skin hue, what was said BY him wasn’t racist, but what was said TO him was.

Given the BBC’s woke agenda, only matched by their ability to make mind numbingly trivial game shows for transmission every day, I am surprised they haven’t yet thought up “The Race Race” – they could get Linecunt to introduce it – Max Factor and Walker Crisps could sponsor it. Line up to see which darkie is most offended today, the winner to be be awarded a prize from Doreen Lawrence.

Nominated by: W. C. Boggs

I am sorry to say the Hewitt-Windsor News Bureau (HWNB), are at it again – fuck Brexit, fuck even Covid19, Mrs. H has something to say, and you’ll goddam have to listen to it till it’s talked away:

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-55068783

“Harry dear – we haven’t been in the newspapers a WHOLE day, what can we do?

Harry: Quick old girl, drink this bottle of gin, I’ll run you a very hot bath and take a knitting needle in with you”

I wouldn’t put it past the attention seeking arsewipes.

Nominated by: W. C. Boggs

And seconded by: Captain Quimson

Seconded WC,

I must say I was most distressed hearing about a small collection of half caste foetal cells being ejected from the Duchess of da corn bread, hearing cunts like this go on about miscarriages reminds one of “the United appeal for the dead” off Kentucky Fried Movie,

miscarriages are not babies Megan, doctors can legally terminate a pregnancy till birth under the 1967 act so stop trying to hog the limelight from Wills and Kates dog, okay hun, utter cunt of piss boiling proportions!!!!

Last few days ive felt a bit tired,
The akita gets me up early,
Few big jobs on,
But felt low energy.
Woke up this morning and one side of my face had swollen up!
Looked like fuckin Popeye!
Abcess.
Had them before, they poison your blood, can be pretty bad if left untreated.
Fuckin teeth the treacherous bastards, so been the dentist who was about 12yrs and he told me in his expert opinion it was a abcess
So on antibiotics and cant touch alcohol for 7days, then get the tooth yanked,
Ive more fingers than teeth,
I fell asleep sat upright before
At bleeding teatime,
Abcesses are poisoners like the Russians.
They are truly cunts.

(Thanks for making me look through a ton of gross disgusting pictures – NA)

Nominated by: Miserable Northern Cunt

An urgent, XXXJug-eared cunting for Mike Craven-Todd, whose auricular flaps would make St. Gary jealous. This psycho-eyed, with more than a slight hint of the diddler about him twat keeps popping up bemoaning the fact that he has to go to shitehole cuntries to watch the appalling sights – kiddies drinking polluted water; this natuwally makes him vewy angwy. Vewy vewy angwy indeed. Apparently every two minutes we don’t send dosh to WaterAid, some junior aspiring architect dies. In this season of goodwill, I persuade fellow cunters to do as I have done – namely to sit back, make obscene gestures at the screen, and put £2- in my own Christmas box, towards a bottle or three of Balfour’s sparkling white from the Coop.
(nb: Lady HBelinda does not sit on the Coop board. Nor does she sit on any of their faces)

Nominated by: HBelindaHubbard

Amazon, their Staff and Drivers.
A Yuletide cunting for these cunts please. A new Amazon depot has opened near Cunty towers. Hmm you think so what? Well the drivers cannot follow the highway code for a start.Any turning off the road, blocked by a fucking Amazon van. Ask them nicely to move fuck off. There are a set of traffic lights at the depot, Yours turn green, some cockwomble is coming out on a red light. I was always told that red meant stop, silly me.
Next onto the staff, long fence behind the bus stop, diamond link fencing. Where do you think the Coffee cups go? Yup you got it in the fucking fence. A veritable new plastic artwork, done by fucking Amazon’s monkeys.
Who do you think clears this artwork up, you’ve got it the fucking council.
Why the fuck they (the council) don’t get the useless fucking rozzers to prosecute the cunts, fuck only knows
Must finish now before my bladder bursts under the pressure of my piss boiling.

Nominated by: CuntyMort

Added to by: Norman…

Oh, and never order a 12′ record or LP from Amacunts. It’s packed in a flimsy plastic bag and loads of other crap is put on top of it in the van. Said record arrives with dog eared sleeve. Complete bollocks.

…and talking of Amazon, here’s one from Cuntologist 

Black Friday on Amazon

Don’t see any amazing deals just a few quid off tat I don’t need that still seems expensive for what it is.

The Black Friday home page is currently proudly displaying ‘0ver 30% off Giant Toblerone 4.5kg Jumbo Bar for £44.99, was £73.99.’ Do I want it? No, that’s nearly 50 quids worth of chocolate. Ridiculous!

Do I want £20 off an Echo Dot? No, little spying machine fuck off. I’ve got two legs and two hands, happy to select my own channel or look up the weather or whatever.
Do I want a Shark vacuum cleaner that was £350 and is now almost £200? No, still too expensive for something that sucks up dust.

Bah humbug to it all.

Also piling in on Amazon is General Tso’s Chiggun:

I would like to nominate packaging. I picked up a weighted blanket in Amazon’s Black Friday Week sale to help with my sleep, which arrived today. And, lo and behold, it is packaged in not one, but TWO separate boxes, both sellotaped tighter than a nun’s cunt. What is the fucking point of that?