Private Eye was once a great magazine, a unique British institution. I used to read it regularly as a student in the late 80’s. I loved the in-jokes about Ugandan discussions, Sir Jammy Fishpate, Captain Bob, Sir Buffon Tufton, Sid and Doris Bonkers of Neasden FC, the Grauniad, Jeffrey Barnard (“Jeff bin in?”), Beardie Branson, the Dirty Digger, Brenda and Phil. I used to love the comic strip which imitated my beloved Commando Comics with Sapper Kinnock battling a Nazi Thatcher and her Waffen DHSS, with Fatty Hefner’s “cruel Cockney humour”. They also did a Dan Dare one with Thatch the Supreme Ruler of the Universe that was just as good. It was anti-establishment and stuck up for the little man. It’s mercilessly exposed corruption.

But something happened. Perhaps that something was Brexit. All of a sudden Private Eye became The Establishment. It’s satire was now directed against Brexit and against the “stupid Little Englanders” that voted for it. It came out as fanatically pro-EU. It became dreary and boring. Cover after cover lampooned Boris Johnson and Brexit. It’s not worth the paper it’s printed on any more.

The problem is likely to be Ian Hislop. He’s a self confessed Remainer and has become part of the Establishment blob that seeks to grind us down at every opportunity. He’s a preachy intolerant bore that likes to remind us how ignorant we are compared to his own enlightened status. The result is that Private Eye has been defanged and is now a boring cunt.

https://unherd.com/2019/07/how-private-eye-lost-its-bite/

Nominated by: Marvellous Mechanical Cunting Machine 

Andrew Marr. Leaving, thinking of leaving, threatening to leave the BBC.
Because the BBC is biased. Shock, horror.

As Battery Sergeant Major Shut Up Williams would say Oh dear. How sad. Now fuck off.

Supplementary nomination for the Beeb for employing this tosser in the first place.
Love to see him and Jeremy Clarkson bareknuckled behind the bike sheds. No fisting.

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-9586053/Andrew-Marr-says-leave-BBC-say-really-thinks-politics.html

Nominated by: Fudman

Furniture poverty, as publicised by the BBC.

The link is a short film about a woman with no furniture. In London, natch.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/av/uk-57076659

I watched the first bit. If you can be arsed watching note that:

The woman isnt British.
She is a single parent.
She has a very nice flat.
She is entitled and bears no responsibility.

I am assuming she pays for none of this. I may be wong but I doubt it.

So come on, why arent we getting Harrods to furnish it? And it’s good that the BBC highlights our guilt and obligations.

Nominated by: Cuntstable Cuntbubble

A “don’t-you-know-who-I-am?”, back to 1997 mini-cunting please for schoolmarmish, self important Pixie Balls – yes, Yvette “Sugartits” Cooper is back to leap aboard the Blair bandwagon since she saw Rachel Reeves creep back to the front bench last week – aided and abetted by the greasy old queen himself, who lets us know he is still available.

How long before working class heroes Hilary Benn and Mandy join them in the foetid chamber, still reeking from the afterglow of AnalEase;s soiled bloomers?

https://www.express.co.uk/news/politics/1436818/BBC-Andrew-Marr-Labour-Party-news-Yvette-Cooper-Keir-Starmer-latest-covid19-update-vn

Sugartits takes herself FAR too seriously and it should be remembered that, in addition to her part in the expenses scandal, with her husband, she and Hilary did all they could to overturn Brexit. These days though, like Kweer and Anthony, not forgetting Doreen Lawrence (though she is highly forgettable) she has taken up epidemiology. and crystal ball gazing.

Britain needs a strong opposition but Kweer’ s shambling shower isn t it. We don’t need an infant school teacher dreaming of 1997 mithering on, and the re-emergence of these ageing backbench harpies is depressing and disgusting to see.

Of course, the big question for the little lady is – how has Ed Balls managed not to flatten her in bed?

Nominated by: W. C., Boggs

Money well spent. Foreign aid.

This fascist racist government has been severely criticised for cutting the foreign aid budget. Mostly from people who earn large sums from it – charidee bosses etc. And of course the woke.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/newsbeat-39653421

Where does the aid go?
Overall, the top five countries receiving UK aid were Pakistan, Ethiopia, Afghanistan, Yemen and Nigeria, with almost all the money going to countries in Africa and Asia.

I wonder how long the woke would last in any of these places?

Pakistan. Corrupt, rotten, persecuting non muzzies using a blasphemy law which only works one way. A PM who wants the West to ‘respect Islam’ By instsalling blasphemy laws. Also has a nuclear bomb.

Ethiopia. Doesnt seem to have moved on from 1985. St Bob really made a difference.

Afghanistan. See Pakistan. No bomb but otherwise vile, bigotted and rotten. Has misused $trillions.

Yemen. Another hell hole being used for a proxy war by the benign states of Iran and Saudi.

Nigeria. Where to start? Savage, corrupt, rotten to the core. Any aid going here ends up back in London in certain bank accounts.

We can chose not to contribute to Mbongo’s bucket. However were are taxed to contribute to Mbongo’s political elite.

Money well spent.

Nominated by: Cuntstable Cuntbubble