A “Hot Composter” seems to be an oversized beer cooler with a thermometer and an array of consumables that make the claim of “Free compost” very dubious.
Well fuck that for a game of soldiers, some tin sheets a bit of celotex and some second hand decking, a probe thermometer and voila a home made compost bin.
Chucked in a load of grass clippings some twigs and a nice 60C for about 4 days and the fucker splutters out.
So its time to start reading up on this shit.
I need to oxygenate the fucker, I can buy sacks of half composted shit for this or….practice golf balls.
So I empty the fucking thing and reload it with compost and golf balls.
Yes 60c for about 3 days and it splutters out. Moisture content to high (” good compost should have the feel of a squeezed sponge”) use drying medium…….. what the fuck is that?
Paper shreddings! by good fortune the office decided to clear out all the received purchase orders, so after shredding apx £160,000 worth of purchase orders I had my medium. (I note that this will make invoice queries over the next two years a little difficult, but it was not my decision to shred them).
So again hook all the shit out, create a raised lower bed of mesh, mix the compost with the “Drying medium” and repack the fucker complete with little golf balls.
Now back in the day I used to have 3 piles of shit in the garden, Ready, Getting there, and in use, that was my composting system and it worked quite well, anything to chunky in Ready would be delegated to in use and lets see if it survives another 2 years.
This “Modern” scientific process is a pain in the arse, it even suggests drying out items to be composted to judge the moisture content so that I can gauge adequate drying medium.
My friends composting can be a cunt.
Nominated by: lord benny(not quite deceased, but close)