Football Chanting Through the Ages

I used to be an active football fan from the mid 70s to early 90s, following my team (Birmingham City – yeah, I know they’re shite!) both home and away.

One of the great pleasures of going to a ground and standing in the appropriate supporter’s stand, was that of the chanting. Back then we had lovely little ditties like:-

“You’re going home in a fucking ambulance!”
“We hope your balls drop off!”

“No one likes us, we don’t care!”
“Who ate all the pies?”
“Who’s the wanker/bastard in the black?”
“You’re shit and you know you are!”
“Migger, Migger, Lick my boots!”

“Shit on the Villa!”
“What the fucking ‘ell was that!?”
“You’re gonna get your fucking heads kicked in!”

There were probably loads more, but I wont bore you any further.

Fact is, these days I doubt if fans sing half of these chants, probably because fans are not allowed due to causing offence.

I can probably understand why racist chants are no longer tolerated, but quite a few chants I’ve heard on TV these days seem rather lame in comparison.

Perhaps its because fans have to sit rather than stand in large tight gatherings; or that some of the newer stadia just don’t have the same cosy atmosphere. Or perhaps modern day fans are just too woke/flakey to want to be seen as aggressive or give hurty feelings to opposition fans probably because there’s more women attending than ever before.

Perhaps I’m simply out of touch because I haven’t bothered going to the grounds since just before the Premier League was born in 1992 and everything turned to corporate shite!

Nominated by: Technocunt

Seconded by: Dark key cunt

I second this cunting with whomever advertised on CNN.

There’s some ad on CNN that says true football fans have no borders. Fuck off. Green Lanes in Norf Laahndon divides the boroughs of Islington and Haringey. South of Green Lanes is Arsenal country. North of it is Tottenham country. Fucking spuds.
(Technically, Woolwich is Arsenal country – NA)

It was Catarrh Airways. The fucking slave-driving cunts.

True Fans Have No Borders

63 thoughts on “Football Chanting Through the Ages

  1. The Korean Geezer at Spurs-

    🎶 ‘He shoots, he scores.
    He’ll eat your Labrador, Ho Chi Minh, Ho Chi Minh (whatever his fucking name was)🎶

    On a similar note We of course do not endorse this link for any Koreans or people from Liverpool. We’re a sensitive admin team. We care. – DA

  2. Good Nom Techno because the 70s was an era I liked.

    Not a Blues fan but that forward line of Hatton, Francis and Latchford would cost £250m today with Bob more than worth his place in that company.

    And a big shout out to the great Hugh Johns. Much missed. As is Deadly Doug (I know he was Villa.). Nowadays there’s a wimminz nonentity doing the commentary and some shyster cunts from the US for owners.

  3. The diving Herman Klinsmann first played for the spuds at vicarage road in a pre-season friendly. The east end barrow boy made good was the Spurs chairman.

    Klinsmann scored and of course he did the swan dive.

    The Watford fans all started singing…

    Chim chiminny chim chimney chim chim cheroo.

    Kilinsmanns a Nazi, Alan Sugars a Joooo…

  4. I remember going to Upton park in 1991 with the Owls the West Ham player Trevor Morley was in hospital, his wife had stabbed him.
    “There’s only one Mrs Morley” was the chant all through the match, when we got outside the ICF had there say, nasty cunts but fun all the same.

    • He’s always been a cunt and almost regaled himself in smug cuntishness. AND there’s a fuxjing no tail commentating on Itv. Clearly from the voice a tuppence licker.

  5. In your Liverpool slums, you look in a dustbin for something to eat, you find a dead rat and you think it’s a treat, In your Liverpool slums

    your mum’s on the game and your dad’s in the nick, you can’t get a job ’cause your too fucking thick, In your Liverpool slums

    In your Liverpool slums, you wear a shell suit and have got curly hair, all of your kids are in council care, In your Liverpool slums

    There’s piss on the pavement and shit on the path, you finger your grandma and think it’s a laugh, In your Liverpool slums

    Always enjoyed that one.

    • On a similar note, I always liked the short but succinct “I’d rather be a p@ki than a scouse”.

  6. If i hear fucking footballs coming home by those pair of unfunny cunts Badeel and Skinner im going to take a hammer to the radio in work, fucking sick of it and cant wait for it to be over.
    If i was an employer all the cunts that phoned in sick today have just been elevated to the top of the list for the next round of lay off,s…
    Fucking football pisses me off on so many levels, its fucking brain damage, still at least the Porto,s next door have been silenced by Hungary, so not all bad…..cunts

  7. “You’re shit and you know you are” one of my favourites.

    The other being “you’re going to get your fucking head kicked in”.

  8. The best football chant must surely be about former Arsenal favourite, Graham Rix. In the late 90’s, when his marriage broke down, Rix found solace in the vagina of a 15 year old girl. Having served 6 months in HMP, he returned to his job at Chelsea. Whenever he stood on the touchline, cue some clever wordplay on a Manic Street Preachers song :”IF YOU TOLERATE RIX, THEN YOUR CHILDREN WILL BE NEXT !”

  9. To the the tune of Norman Greenbaum’s ‘Spirit In The Sky’.

    Gonna go up to the spirit in the sky.
    That’s where I’m gonna go when I die.

    When I day and they lay me to rest.
    I’m gonna go on the piss with Georgie Best

  10. Alas, the gallows humour of the terrace and offensive, passionate chanting is no more. One of my favourites, from Boothferry Park, late 70s early 80s was ‘ you’re going home in very cold coaches’. Not that I condone that type of thing natch.
    We used to have cheerleaders, only young lasses, who often had to endure ‘ get your tits out for the lads’ Unthinkable these days.
    Anyroad, its coming home. its coming home. ENOUGH FOR FUCKS SAKE!

  11. 1976 FA Cup Semi Final. Manchester United vs Derby County.

    Kisses for me. Save all your kisses for me.
    Bye bye, Derby, Bye bye.

    Just fuck off, Dave Mackay.

    ‘Cause we beat you two-nil, With two goals from Gordon Hill.

  12. A particular favourite of mine. To the chorus of Terry Jacks Seasons in the Sun, “ We had joy, we had fun, we had [insert team name here] on the run;
    But the joy didn’t last coz the bastards ran too fast”

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