A couple of years ago I put up a nom on the subject of irritating screen clichés. I was delighted at the manner in which cunters weighed in on the subject and kicked these tiresome tropes to death.

Or so I thought. Annoyingly, another batch of hackneyed scenes and tired lines has crept out of the woodwork for me to have a go at, because lazy scriptwriters and directors just can’t see past them. So ‘don’t you die on me’, because ‘we’ve got a situation here!’. Here are just a few examples that invariably elicit an ‘oh for fuck’s sake’ response from me.

Cut to a scene in any detective drama. Some fashionable types are at an art exhibition or the launch of some singer’s new record, chit-chatting and sipping champagne. Suddenly there’s a scream, the tinkle of a glass breaking, and yells of ‘oh my Gahhd!’ as the star is found face down, a dagger in the back. A female voice off camera then bleats ‘somebody call 911!’.

Then you’ve got the scene where the good guy and the bad guy finally face off. Before all hell breaks loose, the villain feels obliged to philosophise on the nature of his relationship with the hero; ‘you know, it doesn’t have to be like this. We’re not so different, you and me’.

How about the one where the male/female buddy cops are drinking coffee on a stakeout and she says (there’s ‘chemistry’ building between them, remember) ‘ok, so are ya finally gonna tell me what’s really going on between you an’ Maddie?’. He looks into the middle distance, ponders for a second or two, then replies ‘it’s … complicated’. Oh and let’s not forget the one where the treacherous spy chief sneers at the in-over-his-head hero ‘you’ve absolutely no idea what you’ve gotten into!’.

I could cunt indefinitely on this subect, but unfortunately, ‘we’re running out of time!’.
Sadly, ‘this ends now!’.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V_kBdnziEFA&t=28s

Nominated by : Ron Knee

A nomination for the recent development in street narcotics, ‘Tranq’

Not only has this nasty little cocktail seen overdoses in the Southern US increase by ten times in a year, it has the lovely side effect of necrotising the flesh of itsfrequent users.

Tranq is the family favourite Fentanyl cut with herd animal tranquilizer Xylazine, that enhances the high. The trouble is that both drugs on their own are very good at suppressing respiratory and cardiac functions and therefore incredibly easy to overdose on, as weĺ as the Xylazine having the necrotising effect. the reason why is uncertain, but lesions and pustules erupt on the skin creating open wounds that become infected. Amputations of limbs in the addicted are frequent.. it’s either that or die of blood poisoning.

It looks like a truly awful drug.
(Wasters with no impulse control and a drain on society being eaten alive then dying? Not seeing a problem here – NA)

https://www.theguardian.com/society/2023/mar/30/xylazine-drug-overdoses-fentanyl
(Link provided by Miserable northern cunt)

Nominated by : Cuntamus Prime

Yup, not inappropriate to be shouting out names for todgers on daytime telly.

I have no issue with there being adverts for sorting out floppy nob syndrome, it can happen to any cunt (not me of course), I just think adverts talking about ‘erectile dysfunction’ shouldn’t be on while the kids are still awake.

I’m sure little kids all over the country have been asking parents such things as, “Dad. What’s erectile dysfunction?”

Not awkward at all.

Surely putting these adverts on during the ad break for Scooby Doo is a bit much?

Maybe I’m being a bit Mary Whitehouse, but I just reckon these adverts should only be on after 10pm.

Why not advertise my king sized Johnnies and your nipple clamps during Tiswas then? (fuck knows what kids watch nowadays, sorry)

Old article but it covers the topic.

Metro

Nominated by Cuntybollocks.

Kieran Hands and April Pearce were sentenced for keeping dogs, and various other animals, in the most appalling conditions.

You’d have to have a heart of stone not to be moved by the state the dogs were in, never mind the other poor things.

Are Kieran and April cunts?
Yes.
Are they mentally ill?
Probably.

So why did the Magistrates ban them from keeping animals for only 5 years?
Why was their sentence suspended?
The fines were derisory, too.

So, Blackburn Magistrates, you really are cunts.

Daily Mirror

Nominated by Jezzum Priest.

Are Cunts.
Never heard of this cunt before but came across this article where she describes the Royal Balcony as being “terribly white” during the coronation.

That would be because they are a white family you thick fucking cunt and the arm of the family that does contain a black member chose not to attend.

TV companies need to stop giving these divisive cunts the air time. She’s like the female Kehinde Andrews

Following on from the nom by Laughing Gravy. Here is another cunt who has got to grift about racism and evil whitey. David here’s a history lesson for you, Britain stopped it 32 years before the American civil war. It cost god knows how many lives to put a fucking stop to it once and for all. The British people were paying this debt off for over 200 years.

Don’t forget WW1 and WW2 either this racist lot gave more treasure and lives, but I’m sure that hasn’t crossed your tiny mind either.

If you are unhappy which you clearly are why don’t you fuck off back to your ancestral country and do your race grifting there? Thought not, now fuck yourself you CUNT.

Daily Fail

Daily Fail

Nominated by LaughingGravy and CuntyMort.

Seconded by Cuntybollocks:

This stupid ‘diverse’ tart has mouthed off on ITV, calling the Royal Family on the balcony during the Coronation, ‘terribly white’.

I’m not sure what this wooden ‘actress’, who definitely doesn’t get acting roles because of quotas, wants. Does she want members of the Royal family to be forced to marry black people at gunpoint? Perhaps put up a DJ booth and have a human beat box competition instead?

I notice she didn’t mention the all black choir? Was that terribly black?

I recently saw a photo of an England youth football team. Every player, bar the goalkeeper, was black.

Does she have a problem with that? Does she fuck, I bet!

It doesn’t matter how much you appease cunts like this, in my opinion, fucking bitch, it is never enough.

Here’s a better idea. She has half her roots in Ghana, so why not fuck off there if this country offends her so much?

I wonder if any African Royal events have honkies on their balconies? For fuck’s sake, I have seen African TV, including South Africa, and honkies are rarely, if ever, seen. Indeed, Supersport SA (like our Sky Sports) used to be great. I have seen it in recent times on IPTV (I know nuffink) and it’s an abomination now. Shouty, unprofessional, unintelligible black ‘presenters’ and ‘commentators’ only now. Absolutely fucking terrible.

Is she arsed that honkies can’t get a look in there? Is she fuck, the fucking cunt.

Half a shillin’ holy communion shoes song to this fucker and others like her.

Express Link.

And a third helping of race bait bullshit from W C Boggs below.

An Old Man, Cry Me A River cunting for this mouthy actress of colour with a massive chip on her shoulder. Not content with being asked to vouchsafe her little opinions on the Coronation, by dint of being in one of those pulp ITV “dramas”, the old cunt jumped on the race bandwagon, by declaring that the Royal Family are too white:

I suppose the old tart was just miffed that her fellow ham actress Meghan Markle wasn’t there flashing her false teeth. I didn’t watch the occassion and had no interest in it, I think a lot of the moaners would have done better and done like me – ignore it.

I get weary and sick of trying – tiredof living and feared of dying – Mama!