Chris Evans [5]

I detest the four-eyed ginger Spacca. I just wish that he’d been to school with me. I’d have bullied the Cunt relentlessly until he couldn’t speak without a stutter and pissing himself. Wouldn’t have made much of a DJ if he swamped the studio with drool and piss every time he tried to open his flap.

I haven’t listened to the bastard for months. I couldn’t stand the endless talk about his family,very big house in the country and cars. However this morning after that fucking “Angels” song by Robbie (arsebandit) Williams started up on my new channel, I retuned to Radio 2. I was just in time to hear The Cunt Evans banging on about “Glasto” next year. That was enough for me,anyone who talks about “Glasto” is obviously a rampaging half-wit.

I had hoped that after getting the sack from Top Gear that the braggart would be so ashamed that he would load his family into one of his “I’ve just bought such and such car for £250k, blah,blah,blah) vehicles, loop a 50 yard long rope around all of their necks,tie one end to a tree in the grounds of his country estate and drive off at 90mph.

Apparently Evans has been encouraging his 5 year old son to wear a dress…as a DJ,I wonder if Chris’ll Fix It for the child to make an early appearance on the celebrity circuit?

Fuck him.

Nominated by Dick Fiddler

Top Gear [3]


I wish Chris Evans would hurry up an have a heart attack. I’m sick of seeing his stupid cunt face, the run up to the new Top Gear has had him in the ‘news’ daily.

Now, with the first show aired, the big debate is on: Namely, “is he a bigger cunt than Clarkson”? My answer is always going to be YES. Evans has, and always will be a cunt of the first order, annoying to the point of torture. I didn’t watch it last night, and I will never watch it while that prick has anything to do with it.

How bad were the scripts that they had to get Danny Baker in to improve them? It is going to be a show about the ginger cunt, his cunt cars and his cunt showbiz cunt mates. FUCK OFF YOU GINGER TWAT!

Nominated by: Gutstick Japseye

Dr. “Jizzer” Clarkson at least knew what he was on abite…Ginger minger was on the front page of some rag the other day…convinced he’s going to die in some car fuck-up, or something.

Please, Evans, just hurry along now !!

Nominate by: HBelinda Hubbard

Top Gear [2]


Surely it’s time to slam both Top Gear formats into the armco.

Jeremy “what d’you mean there’s no hot food I’m gonna punch some poor cunt” Clarkson, Blue Peter presenter candidate Hammond and Catweasle lookey likey posh nob May are well over due to be trailered to the scrapyard.

Each series pretty much the same as the previous. Rich cunts driving some cool cars in great locations, having a jolly up on my tv license fee.

Whether this forced Amazon defection is a success or not, I’m sure the audience is likely to be more foreign than domestic. Amazon fire stick! Fuck off.

Not sure the Beeb’s revamp will rock the viewing figures either. Ginger cunt Evans and his school boy humour is a sure fire reason to reach for the remote.

Nominated by: J R Cuntley

The new Top Gear deserves a cunting. Those far left cunts at the BBC, and their associates have had to grovel today, after performing donuts and other stunts at the Cenotaph. Every British adult in the country knows what the Cenotaph is, and what happens there every remembrance Sunday. So I find it puzzling, especially after what happened with that little shit swinging on a flag a couple of years ago, that anyone would think it appropriate to film some cunt fucking about in a high powered car.

This just proves, as if any proof were needed, how little respect the traitorous lefties at the BBC, and those who make TV shows for them, have for this country, and for those who died to give them the freedom to be the cocksuckers they so obviously are. I was willing to give Top Gear a chance, even with the ugly, arrogant carrot top, Evans hosting it. Now they can fuck off. And I’m not alone. A lot of former service personnel used to watch that show, they won’t be now, nor will a lot of other people.

The fact is, Top Gear worked because of the three hosts. And because, unlike other shows from the Blatant Bollocks Corporation, it wasn’t politically correct. In fact, it showed a lot contempt for PC, and those who live by it. Which is why Danny Cohen hated it. It’s a simple fact that the extreme left Danny Cohen despised Clarkson for his right wing views, and was looking for an excuse to get rid of him. It’s also a fact, that Clarkson stupidly allowed his ego to give Cohen that excuse. Cohen fucked up in thinking that he could simply replace Clarkson, and Hammond and May would go along with it. He was very wrong.

This new Top Gear will be a shadow of its former self. It has too many presenters for a start. Led by Chris Evans, whom I have yet to hear anyone say a good thing about. Evans is an arrogant little shit who genuinely thinks he’s God. It will be filled with similar things that the original TG had, only with a left wing slant to it. And that’s why it won’t work. Most ordinary people are not lefties. We’re not particularly righties either. We just don’t share the same dumb as fuck politically correct view of the world that the shitheads at the BBC have.

Nominated by: Quick Draw McGraw

I predict that the New Improved Top Gear will crash and burn (and hopefully Matt LeBlanc will lose his rag and punch Evan’s lights out)

Despite Clarkson’s constant baiting of motorcyclists like myself and general disdain for enthusiasts of vintage machinery (also like myself) I did enjoy Top Gear while it was on but we’ve just dispensed with the TV licence anyway so the Beeb can stuff the new version up their “collective” ringpieces.

I will however always feel the urge to boot James May up the arse for sending that Triumph convertible to the bottom of the English Channel…

Nominated by: Mr Bastard

TFI Friday


Just when you thought TV was taking a turn for the better with axing ‘The Voice’ some gormless cunt decides to bring back ‘Oh Fuck It’s Friday’…

Chris Evans – a cunt who has been sacked more times by the BBC than Clarkson and that’s saying something – is clearly running short of dosh and not content with bolloxing up Top Gear, he’s going to subject us to more of this mindless fucking drivel. Christ help us!

Yes, all the old shit is there – including Freak or Unique and Baby Left, Baby Right and It’s Your Letters. The only good thing about this tripe is that Evans insists it’s the last time he’ll do it – he’s so busy with Top Gear and the BBC Breakfast Show (from which he was sacked twice for not showing up). And if you believe that, you’ll believe anything!

Is there anybody out there who doesn’t think Chris Evans is a solid gold, weapons grade, self centred, carrot topped, egotistical, good for nothing piece of ubershit? If so, you’re a cunt too!

Nominated by: Dioclese

Chris Evans [4]


Dear Chris Evans,
You fucking cunt,
How I’d love to hit you,
With something hard and blunt,
Then go back to your mother’s,
So she can make me brunch,
Oh Chris Evans,
You are a fucking cunt

Nominated by: Cunt

So, it’s Carrot Top Gear.

Let me see if I get this right : The Beeb sack Clarkson. They then give his show to a carrot topped cunt who they’ve already fired twice because he couldn’t be bothered to get out of bed for his own breakfast show.

Hypocrisy? Double standards? Shurely not…

Nominated by: Dioclese