Author Archives: A Cunt Who Cunts Cunts

The BBC (10)

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The fucking BBC.

Just watched a news report on London knife crime filmed in a hospital. The victim was white. He had a proper family. He was stabbed for his bike and phone. They didn’t say who by, but we can guess, cant we?

The only black faces were medical and support staff.

It appears from this BBC ‘in-depth’ report that white kids are involved, even if only as robbery victims. No mention was made of the real culprits. Apparently, it is an ‘urban’ problem. Liverpool, Brum, Nottingham etc. Again no reference to who the main perpetrators are.

What I got from this fearless journalism was that if you dare to have a bike and/or phone, you are the problem. Not the feral scum that infest the cities. Not the babyfathers. Not the total aversion to education. Not the total lack of aspiration. Not the culture in which these things thrive. No, it seems to be society’s fault due to lack of opportunity.

Well done BBC. Totally unbiased and fearless reporting as usual.

Nominated by Cuntstable Cuntbubble

Mark Rylance

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Mark Rylance is a plutonium grade cunt.

I just caught sight, on the News at Ten, of this earring-wearing, scruffy cunt looking like some crusty juggler, at the Extinction Rebellion protests in the People’s Republic of Nasty Smells, aka London.

What gives this am dram fucking fairy the notion that he has some divine understanding of, and special insight into the problems the world faces, and that through his very, very important virtue signalling, he will educate and enlighten us ignorant and directionless ‘little people’?

Fuck you and the shithouse you crawled out of, Rylance. You are a grossly overrated actor and a copper-bottomed, pious old cunt to boot.

When you speak, the needle on my couldntgiveafuckometer doesn’t deflect by a picometre.

Fuck off.

Nominated by Paul Maskinback

World On Fire (BBC drama bollocks)

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The BBC’s “World On Fire” is a cunt, isn’t it?

(Riiiinng)
HEAD OF PRODUCTION: Hello?
BBC CHIEF CUNT: I want an update on our new war drama? Have you complied with our request to make it Euro-friendly?
HEAD OF PRODUCTION: Yes, we’ve managed to make most of the British stuffy or racist, sometimes both.
BBC CHIEF CUNT: Good, good, and you’ve peppered it with Polish people, speaking in their native Dooshka-Dooshka?
HEAD OF PRODUCTION: Yes, it’ll feel like a stroll down to your local town centre.
BBC CHIEF CUNT: Christ. But they’re all sympathetic characters, no bad ‘uns?
HEAD OF PRODUCTION: That would contradict the purpose of the programme, Sir.
BBC CHIEF CUNT: Incidentally, call casting and ensure they’re all attractive and clean, not like those gnarly, drug-dealing cunts in your local town centre.
HEAD OF PRODUCTION: Got it. Good-looking, hard-working, fighting the oppressive Germans. Sorry, I mean…. Nazis.
BBC CHIEF CUNT: Token strong females?
HEAD OF PRODUCTION: Naturally.
BBC CHIEF CUNT: Token Yanks so we can flog this expensive rubbish to them?
HEAD OF PRODUCTION: Yes, but Meryl Streep is a No-show. She’s busy destroying photos of her with Weinstein. We’ll get a Streep look-a-like.
BBC CHIEF CUNT: Now, we’ll need a few homosexuals.
HEAD OF PRODUCTION: Of course! We’ve already crowbarred the man romance to happen in Paris.
BBC CHIEF CUNT: Hmm, can it be in a jazz bar to make them more sympathetic?
HEAD OF PRODUCTION: We could make one a musician.
BBC CHIEF CUNT: Yes, good. Hmm, could we make one of the homosexuals black?
HEAD OF PRODUCTION: In 1939 Paris?
BBC CHIEF CUNT: For fuck’s sake who cares about historical accuracy? We’re the BBC!
HEAD OF PRODUCTION: I’ll put a person of colour in every scene I can, Poland, France, England.
BBC CHIEF CUNT: Wonderful. This’ll make great propaganda…I mean, drama.
HEAD OF PRODUCTION: Must dash, Sir. I’m meeting Gina Miller and Ken Clark for lunch.
BBC CHIEF CUNT: Oh, one last thing. Make one of the Nazi soldiers likeable. Give him a heart, some mercy, he spares killing some poor prisoners, or some sentimental crap.
HEAD OF PRODUCTION: Consider it done. This shit writes itself.
BBC CHIEF CUNT: Well as long as we don’t have to watch the melodramatic wank.

Nominated by Captain Magnanimous

Kathleen Kennedy

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A nomination for woke twat Kathleen Kennedy, who took over from George ‘Jabba Neck’ Lucas after selling Lucasfilm to Disney. Since then she has managed the feat of unravelling the most valuable intellectual property in cinema history by not having a coherent idea of where to take the series, hiring and firing directors, assembling a group of SJW in a ‘story group’ who have little vision, idea of dramatic tension, character arc or what made the earlier films so popular.

In Abrams they found a hack who will simply remake the earlier films without any charm or flair, while introducing his own pointless in-jokes and gimmicks.

Kennedy has flailed around from one disappoint to the next while sales of toys, books and games plummet, as a new generation looks to stuff like Marvel and Pokemon, and the much-hyped theme park, ‘Galaxy’s Edge’ threatens to go bust.

Kathleen Kennedy is a twat, a cunt, a gormless cretin and an SJW surrounding herself with sycophants and soyboys, like Rian Johnson, who killed a golden goose.

Nominated by Cuntamus Prime

Cunt Customers

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I would like to nominate cunt customers.

There’s about 101 shit TV programmes about bad builders, usually fronted by that cunt Nick fucking Knowles. What there is a massive lack of is fucking terrible customers tv progs.

I’ve been in construction for thirty years and learned a lot from the older blokes who passed more than knowledge of laying a brick, in regards to fucking bad payers. I’ve watched a few of these fucking dire productions, and the majority of the clients are transparent as fuck.

They had an idea (because some cunt at work had it done and it looks lovely) so they want it done. They couldn’t afford it in the first place, but still want someone to turn up, give them a reasonable quote, start on Monday and expect the contractor to pay for all the materials. Then when the contractor asks for the agreed interim payment, they act like they’ve been asked a question in fucking Russian. Why these people on this shit TV are left in the shit is because they didn’t pay the bill. And Nick Knowles should be hung for his part in this farce.

Sometimes customers can be utter fucking….CUNTS.

Nominated by Candygram for mongo