Author Archives: A Cunt Who Cunts Cunts

Ian Hislop (2)

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While we are slagging off the BBC (and why not?) I would like to nominate one Ian Hislop for his recent conversion to cuntishness. I used to like this bloke and I particularly admired his 2 series on the Great War and Victorian philanthropists. However I can’t watch HIGNFY any more because of his constant pro-EU sniping, usually aided by the guest presenter or some no mark politician on the panel.

I’ve stopped buying Private Eye for the same reason. Sorry Ian you used to be good but now you are just another BBC funded remoaning cunt and you can fuck right off.

How the mighty have fallen. Shame.

Nominated by Freddie The Frog

The NHS (2)

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The whole NHS is a pile of fucking dog shit, if you ask me.

Overpriced and under performing, it wouldn’t mater how much money you threw at it would only become worse. It is a money pit in the truest sense. £1885 per year for every man, woman and child in the country ( not including illegal immigrants ) and you can still die for want of seeing a GP? Fuck right off. I pay less than a 1/3 of that for private insurance and get to see a quack any time I like. Need a scan? How about this afternoon. Hip replacement? Would next week suit you?

Now I’m sure there will be many of you who have relatives or friends who have had their lives saved by the blessed NHS, but don’t think that proves it is the only way of running heathcare.

UK is the only place in the world that has this model of healthcare, does that tell you something?

The NHS is not the envy of the world and no more than is the BB fucking C. Both are an embarrassment and should be ditched soonest.

Nominated by Skidmark Eggfart.

I’ve had mixed experiences with the NHS over the years mainly to do with my ma and pa, both gone now.

A lot of NHS staff over the last few years are very poorly trained and don’t give two fucks. It’s just a job. Half of the cunts look like they just rolled out of bed and went to the laundry basket in the dark and grabbed some clothes.

Another time when my old man was in hospital I walked into the ward and you could smell the shit straight away. The guy in the next bed had lost his marbles and shat himself and wiped it up the wall. There was a 25 stone fat cunt of a nurse, eating her fucking takeaway at the desk. When I went to tell her, she just sat there and said, “Ah!”.  I kid you not. She came in after she’d scoffed her gruel with a few fucking wet ones to clear up the excrement. Fucking disgrace.

My old fella had all his marbles but they fucking drugged him up to keep him quiet.We had a meeting with the doctors and my sister ended up banging on the fucking table to get him off whatever the fuck they had him on. He was hallucinating BIG time.

It’s fucking frightening to think what’s in store for us poor cunts.

They need a fucking hard cunt of a matron to run each ward with a rod of fuckin’ iron.

Nominated by kendo nag.

James O’Brien (3)

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I would like to cunt London’s Biggest Cunt, James O’Brien at LBC radio.

Not content with attacking Brexiteers, his lips are flapping like a pair of pissflaps in the wind as he cries over the  ‘injustice’ of The Donald presidency. Making regular references to The Donald’s perceived sexism, yet he, as a supporter of the peaceful religion, conveniently overlooks their sexism and homophobia. He has also airbrushed over the behaviour of rapugees in Germany and Sweden, citing it as only a handful. Maybe,he is right, if each victim was the size of a grain of sand and the hand belonged to King Kong.

Another of his favourite pastimes, is that of talking down the British economy post referendum, despite the facts disproving his view. Another, is his likening Brexiteers to the electorate who voted for Trump; the usual racist, xenophobic, simpleton type analogies.

He even runs regular diatribes against Jeremy Corbyn. Love him or hate him at least the man has principles. So what exactly are Mr J.O.B’s politics? He hates the Tories, likewise UKIP; yet his preferred party of many moons ago, the LibDumbs, scored a huge own goal with tuition fees, thanks to Smeggy Cleggy. Finally, for him, the Labour Party is unelectable under Jezzah. Well, there is of course ‘a third way’. He is an identikit fit for B.Liar and Co supporters. Although he has not said it out loud, his meejah career, private school educated, Chiswick residing background, marks him as archetypal New Labour. Hence, his desire to see Jezzah given the Spanish Archer.

He really should take a look in the mirror – although he is so fugly – and reflect on his beardy mouthed bullshit. We are fed up being preached to by self-congratulatory champagne pseudo-socialists.

Our twatty friend sums up all that is wrong with today’s pseudo-socialists. They spout their so called liberal view of the world but in reality represent a neo-fascist form of politics. He fawns sycophantically over those callers who agree with him. Meanwhile, cutting airtime, talking over and putting down all those that disagree with him. Some other presenters on LBC may hold similar views but at least have the decency to hear out their callers.

He even has taken to attacking his fellow presenters, Katie Hopkins and Nigel of the Farage. Disgusted at having to share the same studio as them. Perhaps he is worried they will gain listeners at his expense?

In case, anyone from LBC management is reading this and wonders why I listen to his programme, well, these days I only do for few minutes at a time. Not enough to hear the advertisements that pay his wages, so please bear this in mind before considering renewing his contract.

His own TV debut talk show on ITV in 2015 lasted all of 5 minutes for a reason. The reviews were hardly congratulatory. If he carries on like this, his radio days will be numbered too. Although, perhaps he has a great future with the British Bullshit Corporation, at Newsnight, as his heavily biased opinions align so closely with theirs.

Nominated by Mike Oxard.

Body Positive Movement

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Any chance of a cunting for the body positive movement or BOPO as its known to idiots who cant handle full words.

Its a campaign to make it acceptable for women (not men, funny that) to be obese land whales and that society should not judge them because they are beautiful etc etc , but fail to mention that it costs around 50 billion a yr to the NHS to sort the blubbering arseholes health problems out , which the campaign does not mention.

I smoke, not heavily, but do enjoy a nice hand made fag and I am lambasted everywhere for not being allowed to smoke indoors anymore, overly taxed for my pleasure and to top it all off the bloody fag packets have no design anymore and are just a blackened lung or a dead baby .

Why do I bring this up? Well the cost that smokers bring to the NHS is only 5 billion, monumentally less then the amount the lard arses cost all of us and not a single word said about it in case of hurting feelings. Fuck off, you pussy minded twats, its not BOPO , its called diabetes,cronic heart congestion, and being glued to a mobility scooter cos your legs cant take your enormous bulk anymore, cunt.

Nominated by The sheriff of Cuntingham

Royal Mail (3)

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Since we’re on the subject of shite institutions, I’m nominating the Royal Mail. Like a lot of the country, my part of England endured the kind of downpour that would have worried Noah. We currently have a new postie who, like a number of his predecessors, is a complete fuckwit of a cock womble. Even when it rains, this brain donor carries the post for the next few houses in his hand, instead of his bag like he’s supposed to.

Unlike us non-retards, there are a number of posties who seem oblivious to the fact that letters, which are generally made of paper, do not respond well to getting soaked. Yesterday, I received an A4 sized envelope which contained copies of my pension statements and details, which I’d had to send to the British Legion for a matter they’re helping me with. The envelope was so wet, it had disintegrated before the dumb shit had even brought it anywhere my house.

Consequently, a lot of personal info such as my NI number, bank details, pension details, full name, date of birth and even my Army service number became available to the postie. Now I’m not accusing him of stealing my identity or anything like that. However, it needed to be signed for and nobody was home at the time he tried to deliver it, which means it spent the night at the local sorting office, where EVERY Royal Mail employee who worked there had open access to it.

So this morning, after picking up my soggy mass of papier mache, I made a call to the main office in Manchester and got through to the lovely Charmain, who made it clear that she could not have given less of a fuck. After struggling to keep my calm, and threatening to make a personal appearance, I was put through to a manager, who turned out to be only marginally more intelligent than Charmain. Nice bloke though, I’ll give him that. He wasn’t sure what it was that I wanted apparently, and seemed surprised when I told him that I wanted the offending postie spoken to and reprimanded for not doing his fucking job properly.

He said that he’d look into it, but somehow I’m not convinced that will happen. How is possible that a supposed adult could not summon the wit to put the mail he was responsible for, into his fucking post bag, to stop it getting wet? So, Royal Mail, what a bunch of cunts.

Nominated by Quick Draw McGraw.