are cunts.

Now that Auntie Kweer has departed this political coil, it is time to find more talentless motherfuckers like him to laugh at. Step forward the bargain basement version of Harry Hewitt & Meghan, or the Beckhams – the thick as pig shit pair the Swash-Solomons.

It seems they have moved out of their home, “Pickle Cottage” – which sounds the sort of name a pikey might give his caravan and here they are displaying their wealth with a display of vulgar ostentation.

He is an ex-soap actor she is an ex Primark model and alleged singer. If they can do it, so can we (if we were coarse and desperate enough):

aol

Nominated by W C Boggs.

is a cunt.

“England’s National Child Mortality Database found that black children were over three times more at risk of drowning as white children between 2019 and 2025. Putting ethnicity aside, risk was also more than twice as high for children living in the most deprived areas compared with the least deprived.”

The horror.

“Over Britain’s record-breaking hot summer, we’ve seen a number of tragic deaths in lakes, rivers, and at sea, all of which will contribute to the UK’s annual total of drownings. There’s no official data yet for 2026, but in previous years we’ve seen black children and adults over-represented in the drowning figures”

Nature must be a racíst cunt eh?

“For Kevin Hylton, emeritus professor of equality and diversity in sport at Leeds Beckett University, that started with his childhood. “I grew up in a working-class Caribbean family where swimming wasn’t a thing that was done,” he says. “We had almost zero leisure as a family together. It was done through school.”

What can be done in the face of discriminatory H²0?

Expect a govt enquiry soon.

bbcnews

Nominated by Unkle Terry.

is a cunt.

If you call yourself Mad kenny,
your not necessarily mad.
you might be a bit daft.
or slightly puddled.

But not this grandad.
driving at speeds of 150mph on the wrong side of the road.
he phoned the police threatening carnage and telling them his name was MAD KENNY.

its nice when someone lives up to their nickname.
and that dangerous driving isn’t just for Middlesbrough teenagers.

Give me a diablo sandwich and a dr pepper I’m in hot pursuit of a maniac,
sumbitch.
said Northumbria police

google chronicle

Nominated by Miserable Northern Cunt.

Or more precisely, the BBC and the Met’s depiction of this annual blight on society is a cunt.

It’s bank holiday Monday as I write and the BBC are covering the stabfest ‘Live’ on their shitty website.
Superlative bullshit abounds. With gems like ‘Carnival links me to my identity’
And my absolute favourite ‘The carnival is a “teaching tool” that helps younger generations’.
In which case, perhaps the carnival could teach the Met fatso’s some basic mathematics.
At Monday lunchtime, the Met claimed they had made 169 arrests on the Sunday.
Later in the afternoon that figure had been changed to 243.
An easy mistake to make, I guess, when most of the 7000 officers drafted in at tax payers expense are dancing with big black mama’s and taking the knee every five minutes.
Still, it’s nice to hear from the Met that it had been “overwhelmingly positive and celebratory”.
Yeah, right.
Heaven forbid that the public should be told what a horrible crime ridden free for all it really is.
Dear me, no.

bbcnews

Nominated by Field Marshall Cuntgomery.

are useless cunts.

NONE of them fucking work. NONE.

Hold your breath? Tried. Tried strangling myself, suffocating head in pillow, it doesn’t work.

Drink a cold drink? Took a gulp of the heavily iced vodka and orange that gave me the cunts in the first place, didn’t work.

Pull your knees to your chest? Dislodges a mega fart but doesn’t cure the hiccunts.

I know one thing that’ll work, so I’m off to watch an ISIS instruction video.

Nominated by WokeUpTodayAndRealisedWhatACuntIAm.