Electrical manufacturers

appliances spares logos

After the fucking day I’ve had I want to nominate ALL ELECTRICAL MANUFACTURERS!

The cunts with their ‘planned obsolescence’ so your electrical item breaks just after the guarantee period are the fucking scum of the Earth.

I purchased a new washing machine for the wife just 26 months ago, £480 it fucking cost me. When I purchased it the spotty/speccy 14yr old salesman stated “would you like to buy an extended warranty? It’s only £60 a year for 3 years”

I told him to fuck off duly, but low and behold just 2 months after the 24 month warranty ended the fucking thing is fucked. So now I am facing £100 call out + parts to fix this piece of shit or another £400 replacing it!

My mate owns an electronics business and it is common knowledge that manufacturers build in ‘planned obsolescence’ so you have to replace the damn things every 5 years maximum – cunts.

When I was growing up in the 1970’s our family had the same washing machine,tumble dryer, hoover, stereo hi-fi, tv and video recorder (anyone remember Betamax? lol). Those things were built to last and I even have our old tv in my shed (analogue so useless without a set-top box and obviously 4:3 aspect ratio but it STILL FUCKING WORKS 40 years later.

Manufacturers realised that building quality electrical items that would last 10+ years would mean less sales so since the 80’s have been building sub standard shite so you have to replace the products again & again & again.

FUCKING CUNTS!

Nominated by: Jimmy Saviles Used Condom

ISIS Special Forces

[ YouCunts have removed their copy of this video, so here’s another one taken from the Daily Fail in the interests of avoiding PC censorship – Ed. ]

Going off the above video that ISIS very thoughtfully released, they’re more special needs than special forces. If it’s genuine, then we really don’t have anything to worry about. If it’s genuine, it’s a work of comedy gold.

It would seem that they went full retard whilst filming this video. I mean, we saw two of these stone age savages do a forward roll over a Russian machine gun, before one of them bizarrely points it up to the sky. Another clip shows the special needs force performing forward rolls over the crest of ill, something that leaves them even more exposed.

One of my favourites, is the twat who literally straps a bush to himself, and then pretending he was wearing a Klingon cloaking device. It actually brought to mind Adrian from the Fast Show. “Yo ‘aven’t sane may, roight?” One of the classics of the video, was a group of fuckwits apparently walking through a garden whilst smashing a tile over their heads. I’m not sure how that prepares them for combat. Never in my 18 years of service in the British Army did I have smash a tile over my head.

Oh yeah, I can’t sign off without mention ISIS’s very own Bruce Lee. Not so much kung fu, as kung poo. (See what I did there?)

Nominated by: Quick Draw McGraw