Kelly Cates


Kelly Cates (nee Dalglish), presenter of the new pile of arsewank on Channel 5 called Football League Tonight, an utter abomination of a football highlights show, as with all new TV shows it’s all about ‘fans’ ramblings on Twitter, come on get involved with the hashtag #IAMAFUCKINGNARCISSISTCUNT

She has a face that resembles Odo from Star Trek DS9 (or she sat too close to a naked flame and her face melted)

She is only on TV because her Daddy was Liverpool (legend?) Kenny Dalglish and has about as much sex appeal as a holed-out Melon with fake hair glued to it to resemble pubes, Her voice annoys the hell out of me to the point I want to stick pens in my ears.

Nominated by: Boaby

Charlotte Church [2]


Millionaire Charlotte Church had a go at somebody for ‘being a comfortable millionaire with an opinion…’ Well, that makes perfect sense, doesn’t it?
From a millionaire tart who can never shut the fuck up…

Is she really that stupid or just an out and out cunt? Probably both…. The silly Welsh slag should go into comedy, as she’s fucking hilarious…

Nominated by: Norman

Charlotte Church was on Question Time last week spouting off that one of the reasons behind the rise of ISIS in Syria is climate change/drought. Didn’t see it myself, but I can well believe she’d talk shite!

Shut your fucking bone shute you welsh cunt!

Nominated by: Lou Smorrels

Susan Calman


Susan Calman, lesbian Scotch BBC darling has been awarded series of her own on Radio 4 to continue to demonstrate what a desperately unfunny, chippy cunt she is. What CAN people see in her?

There is not much hope for Radio 4 really. Perhaps I should cunt them again? And that whining lefty cunt Jeremy Hardy. What a bunch of cunts.

Nominated by: Jack Savage

Robert Peston [4]


This smug bizarrely annunciating pain in the gonads has been riding the BBC gravy train for years. The egocentric economics commentator cunt is currently stamping his little piggy trotters trying to hissy fit his employers in to paying him loads more moolah (a very good reason not to pay the licence fee) and threatening to take his talents elsewhere. Well fuck orf Peston I say and let us take a look at what the cunt has to offer.

The ugly tosser’s ego is legendary and precisely complemented by a scruffy and poorly dyed barnet. His mangling orf the Queen’s English is a crime against humanity so naturally the BBC PC Brigade has the cunt popping up all over the place. Had an ancient 2CV on the farm that would stutter to a halt like that in the rain then suddenly shoot forward full power without warning. Got £40 scrap for it. Peston’s manufactured pauses and strangulated vowels are the egocunt’s attempts to mask the simple fact that he does not know what the fuck he is talking about.

Pay the man another £Mill a year.

Nominated by: Sir Limply Stoke