(What is she about to suck on in that header pic I wonder? – Day Admin)

ABBA are cunts.

All this fuss about an ABBA ‘reunion’, when there actually isn’t one.

The Swedish 70s pop act are hyping up this big announcement about new recordings and a ‘tour’. People will pay ridiculous amounts of money to see a projection mime songs that are well over 40 years old.

Of course, pooves and knobheads who love that Mamma Mia dog dirt will lap it up. It’d be simpler and cheaper to just put on an ABBA Greatest Hits DVD. But stupid cunts will gladly throw their money away.

As for the new songs? They will probably be shit and remnants from the 70s that were rejected as unusable at the time (a la the Beatles turning a Lennon cast-off into ‘reunion’ cash-in ‘Free As A Bird’).

The ladies’ voices (ABBA’s secret weapon in their prime) will not be the same due to age, yet the hype and hysteria over the new material will be unbearable.

The actual hologram that will be ‘touring’ also looks very shit. It resembles a bad rip off of Space 1999.

ABBA were good at what they did in their 70s pomp. But like so many rock relics, they couldn’t resist the cash-in call. As Vic Reeves used to say, ‘They wouldn’t let it lie’.

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Nominated by: Norman

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And this from The Fuckyou Man

ABBA are over rated cunts.

Sweden’s very own BUCKS FIZZ are praised as some fuckin genius outfit and it’s oh so fuckin cool to say how awesome they are.

No…FUCK OFF!

They were in The Eurovision Song Contest for cunts sake! A total wankfest consisting of the worst songs ever written. Winning The Best SHIT song is nothing to be proud of.

Now these 4 colostomy bag owners have “reformed” and are making a CUM back??
They looked like a bunch of 70s pornstars when they were in their prime! (Yeah, but that blonde piece was my go-to 24/7 wank material during my yoof! – Day Admin)

Just FUCK OFF.

Oh…..and Roxette were crap as well.

For the most part, book publishing has gone down the woke tube and is terminally ill.

A few years ago Penguin almost cancelled its publication of Jordan Peterson’s “Beyond Order: 12 More Rules to Life” due to the hysterical reaction from its staff to publishing this supposed “bigot”. Peterson’s “offence” is that he is an eminently sensible academic who fiercely opposes the woke take on life and slaughtered dimmo Kathy Newman in a memorable car crash (for Kathy) interview. Penguin didn’t cancel probably because they knew they would lose a lot of money.

It’s worse in America. Random House stopped publishing Dr. Seuss due to alleged racism that was “found” in them – after not being “found” in the previous 50 years. Random House also cancelled Richard Cohen’s “The History Makers”, a book about famous historians of the past 2500 years, because Cohen did not include enough black historians (no doubt because there aren’t many).

Simon & Schuster is also in trouble with its employees for signing a two-book deal with former Vice-President Mike Pence. Since they believe that Pence”s opinions are not as valid as theirs, shutting down a leading Republican is, in their view, a public service to society.

This trend has hit the UK. Recently a group of trans nut jobs wrote a letter to The Bookseller demanding the censoring of books that it deems unfavourable to the tranny cause – books like The Bible, Shakespeare, Dickens and the entire Western literary cannon.

Another bunch of tranny nutters called “Pride in Publishing” say that trans employees mental health is put at risk through having to work on JK Rowling’s books –
“Let’s clarify what free speech is and is not. Free speech does not entitle an author to a publishing contract. But it does protect the right of a worker to raise the alarm when they’re asked to participate in something that can cause them or someone else harm or trauma. Transphobic authors are not a protected group. Trans and non-binary people are.”

Bollocks. The job of publishing has always been to publish and be damned. Publishers are meant to keep free speech alive by publishing different viewpoints widely and freely. It’s a very important function in a free society. It seems that to work in publishing now, the biggest qualification is to be a censor intent on stifling free speech.

The quality of hardback books is shite as well.

Nominated by: MMCM

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An Olympic CUNTING for “Dame” Sarah Storey.

She is being lauded as the greatest G.B. Paralympian. It is unfortunate her left hand didn’t fully develop during her time in the womb (Jeremy Beadle syndrome) but every other part of her body is completely healthy and her obsession with training has made her super fit compared with the rest of the population.

It is completely unfair that she is allowed to compete against others with substantial, as opposed to minimal, disabilities. She started as a swimmer, where a missing hand would be a slight disadvantage, then decided to blag it as a disabled cyclist.

How in the names of Beelzebub and Flabbott can a missing hand be considered to qualify anyone for Paralympic Cycling? She should be competing against fully able bodied athletes, as she is in fact the same as them.

The duplicitous Cunt

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Nominated by: Sir Cuntalot

And on the topic of Paralympians, this from Cuntstable Cuntbubble

Not so much a cunting as an expression of puzzlement.

A local girl, as seen on Turnip TV. (Look North, E Riding & Lincs) has got gold medals for Dressage at the Paralympics. I see no visible impairment. She walks, sees and moves normally. So why the paralympics? I could understand it if the horse had a wooden leg. But it didnt. Surely sitting on a gently dancing horse is not something easily impaired?
I have respect for people whose impairment obviously is a disability. We also saw a young man from Hull who won a Judo gold. He is blind so well done to him. Respect. There is also Hannah Cockcroft, paralysed legs but by fuck she can motor. Wonderful.
But the classifications of disability are baffling and often dont seem to be an impairment to the discipline.

Does anyfucker understand them?

IsAC regulars will know that one of the things I attempt when posting is to inject a bit of levity into a nomination (the extent to which my efforts at humour succeed must be left for you guys to judge).

There are some subjects however in which I simply can find no humour, and having to go to a funeral is one of them. At my time of life in particular, they come around with a frequency which is no laughing matter at all.

Last week it was the turn of a friend and former work colleague. Her name was Judith, a lovely woman whose mind had been ravaged by the dreaded Alzheimer’s to the point where she didn’t even know her own name, or could recognise family and friends.

So we all turn up to drag ourselves through the motions, heavy of heart. The person leading the service takes us through the events of the deceased’s life, and attempts to lighten the mood with those ‘happy memory’ anecdotes which are meant to bring a smile and make us go ‘ah yes, that was Judith!’. For me, standing there with a lump in my throat, this just makes matters worse.

Then it’s finally over, to the secret relief of us all. We troop out, making a feeble attempt to console the family with platitudes, wondering in the back of our minds whose turn it will be next.

Funerals. A place you have to be, and the last place you want to be. There’s just no upside whatsoever.

Funerals are a cunt.

Nominated by: Ron Knee

NEWS AT TEN – 25th October 2024

BONG!
674 killed and 230 injured in alleged “mental health” bombing attack in Brighton

BONG!
Innocent Man of Colour receives £500k compensation for being called a hurty name

BONG!
Early polls in Britain’s second and proper referendum for re-entering the lovely EU suggests a resounding victory for Remainers after millions of Leavers fail to vote online due to “technical problems”

BONG!
Prime Minister Analeze Dodds of the newly formed Green Liberal Labour Democratic Bandwagon Party, raises direct and indirect taxation by as much as 50% for all white working class people as part of reparations to the Afro-Caribbean, Syrian, Indian, Afghan, Wimminz and LGBTQP+ communities.

BONG!
Incel racist, fascist xenophobe, Tommy Robinson sentenced to 20 years hard labour for owning a banned DVD box-set of “Love Thy Neighbour”

BONG!
49 year old Transsexual Man becomes England’s first person to legally marry an 8 year old Transsexual schoolgirl

BONG!
The Combined British Media Foundation proudly announce the completion of “Britain’s Build Back Better, Revised History & Literature Project” of all classic literature, reference and school text books, films, plays, TV & radio programmes.

Good evening!

674 people were killed and hundreds injured by a undocumented migrant who was told he would not be allowed a 6 bedroom house and £34,750 pa in benefits for him, his wife and 11 children. As a consequence he suffered severe mental anguish and had no other choice but to “upset” as many people as possible.

We are not allowed to show his face, mention his name, age, current address, country of origin or his race. Although he was assisted by a white man named Mike Cunt, 34, married with 2 children, living in Basingstoke at Number 22A, BombandRun Avenue. Here’s a Facebook photo of him waving an England flag without permission…and another… and one of his family.

A spokesthey said “Although nearly 700 people lost their lives, the grieving relatives must understand the poor migrant suffered vicious racism, homophobia and xenophobia by city councillors, who have all now been sentenced to 40 years at White Privilege Correction Centre (formerly Belmarsh Prison). We believe the man will make a full recovery once the mooted £11million compensation has been finalised.”

In other news, a innocent person of colour has received almost £500,000 compensation for being called “black listed”. The man, who was found with £170,000 of heroin and two Uzi 9mm machine guns in his pockets, which were obviously planted by ex-members of the Police Pride Togetherness Community (formerly The Police Force), is still  traumatized……

(The future of news, coming to a TV near you very soon!)

Nominated by: Technocunt