Football legend Bobby Robson once described Paul Gascoigne as ‘daft as a brush’. No doubt the former footy star has done a lot of daft things over the years, and his latest effort has left him looking like a bit of a wally.

On new Channel 4 shit show ‘Scared of the Dark’, hosted by entertainment giant Danny ‘The Geezer’ Dyer, Gazza told an anecdote which frankly, left me feeling a little bemused.

Gazza related how on a visit to Downing Street back in the day, he’d given Maggie Thatcher a hug. Okay, nothing earth shattering there, you might think. However he then went on to relate how the experience gave him a boner, and he had to retreat to the toilet ‘to whack one out’.

Now let’s be fair; Big Mags was a giant on the political scene in post-war Britain, but she was no Susan Boyle when it comes to getting cocks twitching. Well to each his own, I suppose, but then as for going on national tv and relating the incident, I’d have to say ‘bloody cringeworthy Gazza’.

So is he a bigger cunt for getting the horn for Mrs T, or for going on the goggle box to relate the story? Bit of both I’d say, bit of both.

Daily Fail

Nominated by Ron Knee.

Well, the fragrant “Miss” Mulvaney has hit the headlines again.

The failed actor, who decided to chart his ‘journey’ into girl hood, by primping, pouting and posturing in a series of clips that leave most females either howling with laughter, or vomiting in disgust, has got the makers of Bud Light into bother with a shrieking, squealing post that has most people cringing.

Wishes he had a cunt. (If he wants to see a cunt, he should buy a mirror – NA)

Fox News Link.

NBC News Link. YouTube Link.
(Extra links from our ‘fizzy chemically infused water’ reporter, Night Admin – NA)

Nominated by : Jeezum Priest

Hurty Hurty.

”A horrified shopper brands Sainsbury’s ‘big daddy’ steak sexist”

”Rose Robinson, from Norwich, nipped into Sainsbury’s in North Walsham two weeks ago to grab a few bits when she spotted their ‘Big Daddy beef rump steak’ on the shelves.

The 38-year-old claims she was stopped in her tracks by the meats’ ‘sexist and misogynistic’ name and felt completely ‘bewildered’ as to the supermarket’s thought process behind it.”

Fuck me drunk is there no end to this fucking insanity.

God help Mothers Pride when Rose gets offended by it.

MSN Link.

Nominated by : Cuntstable Cuntbubble

Seconded by mystic maven:

Rose Robinson ‘horrified shopper’.

This pathetic fool has complained to Sainsburys over a pack of steak.
It’s called the ‘big daddy’ steak which is apparently ‘sexist and mysogynistic’ and left her bewildered as she deemed it ‘wrong and unnecessary’.

To double her cuntitude, she reactivated her facebook account to complain and demand that they rename it.

Not sure what the outcome was, but they’ll probably roll over to this cunt and rename it as the ‘non size specific, gender neutral, sperm producing person / birth giving person steak’

It’s been a few months now since Ian ‘Bloater’ Blackford was ousted as SNP party leader at Westminster. Mercifully the Lard of the Isles has been pretty quiet since, presumably deciding to spend more time with the contents of his fridge.

Sadly, this was not to last. Just when you thought it was safe to go back into the water, the Westminster Whale has resurfaced, blowing off spray in all directions.

He’s been gushing on about how ‘inspiring’ the former FM of Scotland Wee Jimmy Krankie is, rejecting calls that the SNP should suspend her after she was caught on camera looking and sounding shifty regarding the state of the party’s finances.

Then he started weakly bleating on about those finances in a BBC Scotland interview, denying that there were any problems or irregularities, and that everything was indeed ship-shape in the old accounts department.

Now about all these resignations Bloater; yours, Legohead and her dodgy looking husband, the party’s finance chief (claiming ‘lack of information’), the party’s auditors… About Peter Murrell’s arrest, the police raids on various properties, the seized documents and the camper van, this alleged missing cash…

If I was you Bloater, I’d keep my head down and my fat gob shut, and stop acting like the turd that won’t flush. Still, looking on the bright side, you’re fairly entertaining the paying public, and if you keep it up, I’ve every faith that in due course, you’ll end up on the IsAC Wall of Fame, a distinction that you truly deserve.

 Youtube

Express

Nominated by Ron Knee.

Rape a 13 year old, you’ll get a free pass.

MSN Link.

Scotland, the same place that allowed an adult male rapist to be remanded in a woman’s prison, because he put a wig on, has handed this thing a 270 day community service order, because apparently, he would have escaped jail anyway as he was ‘only’ 17 at the time of the offence.

I’m sure his 13 year old victim agrees with that. Fortunately, he has been named and photographed. I’ll shed no tear if he’s found kicked to death, in an alley.

Nominated by : Jeezum Priest