is a cunt.
Greetings fellow Cunters! Long time reader, first time poster!
I read this and thought surely this is the cut off point for an ending to UK foreign aid for you, you mighty moon men!
I bloody well hope so when we have homeless people, hungry people and cold people here. I don’t see a reason to seen this arseholes a further penny and indeed may open a government petition to just this effect.
Nominated by ObnoxioMaximus.
Have you all heard about the small budget indie film ‘Sound of Freedom’? Made by the tiny Angel Studio, it stars Jim Caviezel as a US government agent who sets out to save some kids from vicious child smugglers in Columbia.
This film is based on the true story of agent Tim Ballard, and attempts to dish the dirt on a filthy trade that nets foul child traffickers tens of billions every year. A truly worthy film swimming against a tide of woke Hollywood dross by the sound of it. What’s not to like?
Well for some reason, the lefty libs in the States are up in arms about it. I understand that Disney (say no more) formerly owned the film, and blocked its release for years. I wonder why? To make matters worse for Disneycunt, ‘Sound of Freedom’ has been kicking the ass of ‘Indy and the Dial of Dysentery’ at the box office. Oh the joy…
The film’s not even out here yet, but naturally our own, our very own lefty comic The Groaniad couldn’t wait to sing the tune of the shit left media across the pond. The nation’s favourite toilet paper reckons that the film’s ‘paranoid’. It’s all part of some fantastical ultra right wing conspiracy, with The Groaniad going out of its way to launch a personal attack the film’s star Caviezel and the production team.
But here’s a thought for The Grauniad. Maybe the reason for the film’s success is just that it tells a darn important story that needs to be told in a way that audiences can relate to, and the punters flocking to see it are telling Hollywood and its media mouthpieces to stick their woke agenda crap up their arses. The wife and I are really looking forward to seeing it, and I hope you’ll all give it a chance too.
As for The Guardian, well it’s just an arsewipe rag made by cunts, for cunts.
Nominated by Ron Knee.
Heat. The new Channel 5 drama which gives Danny Dyer the chance to expand his repertoire of playing Cockerknee geezers.
This time in Australia, appropriately enough for a cunt, down under.
My dearest was watching this pile of dingo droppings so I looked in.
Danny drives many miles into the bush ( behave yourself) on dirt track roads and arrived in big white Nissan 4×4 without a speck of dust or a squashed bug anywhere. Aye, right.
And amazingly every body has good mobile phone signal.
They have this 10 second recording of an Aussie bird, maybe a magpie. And just to remind us that this is not the garden in Albert Square this recording is played every so often.
They head off for a picnic in the bush with Desperate Danny swinging a big esky like a pouftahs man bag. Obviously totally empty. Nobody worries about lethal snakes, spiders or other friendly Aus fauna.
And all the time Danny gives his best mentally torn Mick of Ears Endahs performance.
I could go on. And on.
So I am cunting Chanel No. Five for this malodorous heap of I-am-almost-a-sleb-get-me-a-job shite.
Nominated by Bushman.
I am letting this pass as it seems like your first cunting. However, please include a link with any cunting you offer in future should you want it posting. C.A.
It’s idiosyncratic I know, but there’s just something about commemorations that get right on my tits.
There are just so many of the fuckers. Okay, I realise that a lot are very well-meaning; they aim to draw attention to, and promote action on, a whole range of important topics, from numeracy and literacy, to fighting diseases such as cancer and strokes, to world overpopulation, to remembering our armed services. It’s a saturated market though, and I for one just blank out from it all. Take the issue of sanitation in the third world, for example. When were you last galvanised into action as a result of World Toilet Day?
What really gets my goat however is the sheer irritating pointlessness of some of these celebrations. I give you Teddy Bears’ Picnic Day, World Emoji Day, Tattoo Day, Talk Like A Pirate Day, Star Trek Day, Take Your Houseplant For A Walk Day… Anybody planning to ‘come out’ on Coming Out Day? Anybody know anybody who’s ‘come out’ on Coming Out Day? And don’t any cunt mention World Bicycle Day, or I may spontaneously combust.
Then you’ve got commemorative weeks. It feels as though we really need the likes of National Chip Week, National Homoeopathy Week and Curry Week in our lives.
Then (oh Lord) we’ve got the months. Whole fucking months to ‘celebrate’ Veggies, Vegans, Mustaches, Black History, and Pride. Yeah, get your LGBTQXYZ rainbow flags out everybody, and insist that MAPs get added to the alphabet community, they’re so marginalised and misunderstood.
Believe it or not, we actually just celebrated National Bikini Day. That’s right, a day to celebrate bikinis. Don’t believe me? Well, take a look;
Er, hang on a mo, I could definitely spring into action for this event. Lordy, but International Masturbation Day on the 28th May suddenly seems like a hell of a long way off…
Nominated by : Ron Knee
is a cunt.
The BBC reports young children and adults alike are walking down the middle of a busy carriageway, instead of sticking to the pavement. Why? They prefer dodging cars, ingesting copious amounts of exhaust and the odd tire track across the back of a favourite coat to simply walking along a path to school.
A village parish councillor(massive cunt) spotted some wild Hemlock growing along the side of the road(as it always has. It can also be viewed in woodland, riverbanks and waste ground) and backed up by the head teacher, who wouldn’t look out of place at any Eco/Pride/Just stop oil protest or a wet lettuce competition have decided children’s lives are at stake walking past it.
Maybe it’s just me, but I myself or any of my kids or anyone else that I know or have seen had a habit of eating plants from the side of the road when walking to school.
Thanks for the warning BBC-never been a problem, but now I guess watch out..and try not to nibble any!
Nominated by Bob Highland.