Fat bastards

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Professor Dickhead, Head of the School of Health and Human Performance at some Canadian University says: “Obesity is an insidious disease, you become desensitised to it and that’s exactly what’s happening in Canada – people are becoming desensitised to seeing obese children.”

And that’s why there’s so many fat cunts. Wankers like that saying obesity is a disease. What a load of fucking horse shite.

Cancer is a disease.
Malaria is a disease.
The bubonic plague is a disease.

Obesity is NOT a disease!

Lazy cunts sitting around eating more food every day than your average African child eats in a lifetime is not a disease. It’s greed. It’s gluttony.

* * * * IT . IS . NOT . A . DISEASE * * * *

“Oh, I can’t help the fact I just ate a family-sized bucket of KFC. I have a disease.”

No you don’t. You’re just a cunt who likes eating too much.

And the children? Insatiable little piggies who will develop heart disease, high blood pressure and diabetes before they reach puberty and will take up hospital beds because they couldn’t fucking eat properly. Think how much money these feckers are costing the health care system.

I dated a chubby once, had to douse the cunt in talcum and look for the wet spot to have sex with her. I heard she carked it munching on a haunch of beef a few years back. Pity, she sure could cook.

Nominated by: Sterculian Rhetoric

England’s Cricket Team

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What a fucking disgrace the England cricket team are. Overpaid useless bunch of cunts! They are like spoilt kids. Sack the fucking lot of them and develop a team that actually wants to play for their country.

Useless bunch of cunts!

Nominated by: Jeremy Clarkson

Farmers [2]

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Farmers are a bunch of whinging cunts the lot of them. The endless, “oh but we have fuck all, we sell our milk for a penny a pint” (while I pay Tesco a cunting quid and a bit for four pints! ….. CUNTS)

As for riding around in top of the range land rovers, they’re doing it on fucking excise free red diesel = tax dodging cunts.

“oh the farm has been in the family for 6 generations” = six generations of tax dodging whining cunts.

You may well provide a portion of what we eat and drink but that doesn’t make you immune to a damn good CUNTING you fucking whining shithouses.

Nominated by: Cripplecock

Farmers are the inbred elite 6th generation of Cunts. Farmer Palmer isn’t a piss take, it is a biography of the whining tight fisted inbred fuckwits. They farm because they are no good for anything else, and they have no social skills.

They think feudal times are the best thing that ever happened to this country. And they live in the cuntry, says it all

Nominated by: The Oncoming Fart

Dick the Shit

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I would like to nominate that bent spined cunt Richard the third. (No coincidence it rhymes with turd).

This cunt, part of the royal scrounger clan, is still sponging up taxpayer pounds long after the bent over cunt is dead! They don’t know where to bury the fucker.

I say take it to the nearest tip horse the bones out the back of a transit and be fucking done with it. Royals are cunts – dead or alive.

Nominated by: Cripplecock

Lorde

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Even here in New Zealand we are not safe from the Cunt Plague.

This pretentious, overrated, over played, loathsome little cunt deserves special praise just for her level of cunty smugness. At 16 years old and looking like some $10 hooker from the trailer park, her gormless fucking songs encourage us to basically fawn/faint/wank over her whenever we hear the dirge-like shit. No chance of that happening here, you CUNT.

And when you have your picture taken, try looking straight at the camera and not upwards from under your fucking eyebrows you nauseating, jumped up slapper.

Fuck-off to America you ugly, talentless cunt. If the Yanks are so hung up on you and your mind numbing excuse for music, then go live over there. CUNT

Nominated by: Kiwi-Cunt

I’d never heard of this so-called teen sensation singer until I saw Kiwi-Cunt’s comment so I just had to take a look and a listen.

Lorde’s voice is “unique and powerfully intriguing” and “way beyond her years”. Her lyrics have been described as aiming “to capture what it really is to be a teen”, singing from a range of topics including the “all-consuming nature of friendship” to “finding yourself come hell or high water.” They “explore classic teen-pop themes – social anxiety, romantic yearning, debilitating ennui, booze-soaked ragers – with an eerie, zoomed-out detachment”

Rolling Stone wrote “Lorde’s languidly aphoristic lyrics balance rock-star swagger and torqued-up teenage angst” and that her lyrics “have a rattle-nerve pathos and power like nothing else going in 2013.”

No shit!?

Well, actually quite a lot of shit. Her melodic content is, to say the least, banal and her lyrics superficial – underpinning the fact that at 16 years old she has fuck all life experience to draw on to make them interesting. Basically, the pretentious little cunt just drones on and on about nothing.

And yeah, she does have this annoying habit of hiding her chin when when she’s being photographed. God help her. The music industry will chew her up and spit her out before she hits 20.

Nominated by: ChasCMusic