This is often mentioned in posts but I think iit deserves its own cunting.

I think there are more of these programmes because their cheap to produce in the Pandemic. Last night a programme on BBC 4 about Michelangelo. Presented by an Asian woman.

Anyway, ‘Civilisation’ with Kenneth Clarke used a lot. ‘I am standing in the Sistine Chapel’ Clarke said at one point. The voiceover -Well, we can see that’. Oh fuck off.

Another programme from the past-‘Michelangelo painted on his back’. ‘Well, he got that totally wrong he painted standing up’. It’s the tone I hate. If the voiceover had said ‘It was once thought that he painted it lying on his back but now we know…’ But no. And you just can’t help the feeling that they’re saying these pompous white men of the past got it all wrong.

‘Are You Being Served’ they did a programme on. Once again the patronising tone. As though- ‘they didn’t realise what they were saying back then, bless them…but you can laugh at it as long you understand the outdated attitudes’. Two Asian women again. So I went from laughing at Mrs Slocombe ‘will you look after my pussy’ to an Asian woman telling me that it’s OK to laugh at it if you don’t take it too seriously.

‘You wouldn’t get away with it now’ they kept saying. Yeah when someone calls someone a ‘fucking shithead’ (‘9 cats out of 10 Cats). You CAN get away with that but not silly Mrs Slocombe and her ‘pussy’.

Even Victoria Wood was guilty of this painstakingly laboriously explaining to us the the subtle relationships of Dad’s Army characters. As though -‘there was funny things in the past, give it a go’.

The worst sort of show for this is What We Watched In The Seventies. There they all are squirming in their seats at the appalling carrying ons back then. Fuck me it’s the mildest stuff imaginable and there they are all appalled. Oh fuck off.

Nominated by: Miles Plastic

An unusual cunting here, but not too unusual in today’s “woke” society.

An advert (Jo Malone Fragrances), starring that great actor John (“Star Wars”) Boyega (never heard of the cunt myself) has been pulled in China, where Mr Boyega’s televisual feast has been rejected and replaced by a Chinese actor. Now the “Wokes” are squealing like stuck pigs about not having any blacks in the Chinese version of the advert.

Well you “slaves of wokedem”, the Chinks don’t like the following people;

Kaffirs
Carpet riders
Americans
White people
Half castes

So as you can see they fit their adverts to suit their consumers. Maybe they should try it in this country. I’m sure it would be popular, and Jo Malone, you’re utter cunts for apologising!!!

Nominated by:Captain Ian Douglas Van Der Byl Quimson 

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/entertainment-arts-54158217

CHRIS GRAYLING M.P:

A bald headed cunting please for this slaphead windbag of an MP who has been a monumental failure at everything he has ut his grubby hands on. But it seems Grayling could fall down Gaylord Adonis’s shitter and come up smelling like Alan Carr, since he has landed a £100,000 job for 7 hours a week:

https://www.standard.co.uk/news/uk/chris-grayling-port-advising-role-100000-money-a4549271.html

Obviously the less time he spends “working” the less damage he can do (in theory) and I don’t have any issue with anybody earning (provided they REALLY “earn” it) whatever they can get, but how can this shit be worth that much money?. It’s not what you know, but who you know……

Nominated by W. C. Boggs

Ashley Banjo laughably calls himself a dancer, I call him a cunt. His so called “dance” lacks the grace of ballet, the culture of Latin, the artistry of ballroom or the appeal of Pole (my personal favourite). Fuck, it’s even more comical than Michael Flatley’s rookie attempt to stamp out a small brush fire. It’s not dance, it’s synchronised circus acrobatics which, given what a fucking clown he is, kinda makes sense. But he aint just one of the dumb circus animals, no, this premium bell end is the ringmaster – the choreographer.

He dragged a talentless troupe of doppelgänger halfwits onto a television show, ironically calling them Diversity despite them being carbon copies of himself – except of course the cute one with the fire hazard hair (someone make sure Flatley is in the wings just in case). That was 2009 and he has milked it (and probably the cute one) ever since.

I’m a charitable sole and these crimes alone do not warrant a full on cunting, however there is more which truly does, brace yourself, it’s about to get ugly.

Over ten years on and with the cute one now dragging around hairy bollox hanging lower than your grandad’s, yet still sporting the frizzled teenager mop top, Banjo’s stellar incompetence lands him his big break. Nobody wants their stand-in to be any good. If you go on holiday and Steve from accounts deputises for you, you spend every second praying he fucks up and makes you look indispensable. So, when the UK’s chief talent scout, Simon Cowell broke his back and needed a stand in, who did he call – that’s right – Sambo Banjo (see below for context before you get too irate at that).

Banjo puts together a routine which seeks to shame an entire nation for the acts of a single individual from another continent – who will likely never see it (lucky him). Racism needs calling out but there is a time and a place. A primetime light entertainment family show is not the stage for political cunt stunts. Maybe Banjo is of the opinion you use whatever stage serendipity deals you, possibly, but the nature of opinions are they differ – but he wasn’t prepared for that and took to social media to condemn all critics as racists.

Now there is a problem here, if you want racists to be viewed as social pariahs akin to paedophiles, child killers, or politicians, then you need to not bandy the term around on a whim just because someone disagrees with you. For to do so renders it banal and no more than punctuation.

Sambo Banjo comes for the 1800’s and was a term used in music. Back then racists abound, although I guess they didn’t see themselves as such, and thankfully we have moved on. Some still persist of course but they are hidden in the fog and haze created where everyone is glibly called a racist. Consequently, we can’t see the wood for the trees, a phrase even older than Sambo Banjo (Circa 1500). The term “racist” has no currency, it should be a potent attention grabbing accusation, but it isn’t, and that is a shame.

Now that Banjo, through the medium of dance, has kindly alerted me and 50 million other Brits to our racist tendencies, perhaps next week he can knock off a few more of our rough edges. Maybe with a routine on child fucking, perhaps then I would see the error of my ways and finally move onto adults. Genocide, human trafficking – come on Banjo – educate me further.

Nominated by: Cunt Spotter

(Chaps – we’re getting quite a few of your comments hitting the mod q, mostly for blunt racial references – To avoid all that hassle can you be a little more subtle/inventive? – DA)

No, I’m not talking about Fleet Streets finest printed shite, but ‘The Papers’ review, that takes place nightly on the Beeb & Sky.

It doesn’t matter which one you watch – they are essentially the same ;
A brainwashed robotic newsreader (clearly following an autocue) and two good for nothing braindead, woke, remainer, BLM appeasers – who can’t wait to give chapter & verse on how badly the cabinet are balsing things up, and how insane this riddiculous brexit business is.

Usual suspect guests include :-
Kevin Maguire (Daily Mirror left wing cunt)
Andrew Pierce (shifty Daily Mail ponce)
Yasmin Alibhaba Brown (Venemous white hating hag)
Polly (Fat arse) Mackenzie “I was Nick Cleggs advisor”- nothing to proud of, Cunt
Rachel (know it all) Shabi (I’m ashamed to live here – FUCK OFF THEN CUNT)
Isabel (Pony Club) Oakeshott (You are so so cleatly beneath me, peasant)
Ella (Tits but no brains) Whelan
Ash Sarkar (Racist, clearly Racist, the man on the tube racially abused me)
Christina Patterson (I’m here simply to riddicule the PM & look smug)
Matthew Syed (We need the power of Divsity in our society, bla, bla)

Don’t worry if you miss anyone’s ‘view’ on Sky – you’ll undoubtedly find them on BBC news the following night.

I’m no longer allowed beer & nuts after 9pm, incase I pebble-dash the TV when venting my fury at these Cunts….

Nominated by: Lord of the Rings